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Gamecrush: Difference between revisions

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<!-- [[File:Gamecrush screenshot.jpg|thumb|right|200px|Really!]] -->
#REDIRECT [[GameCrush]]
It's generally believed that [[No girls on the internet|no girls like to play video games]], except maybe [[The Sims]] or other shitty non-games, but never [[WoW]] or ''[[EverQuest]]'' unless they're actually [[fat]] or [[traps]].
Well, along came [[Cracky-chan]] and [[Pink Poodle]], two [[Do Want|hot]] young chicks who say they do play these games.  So with the hope that [[basement dweller|gamer]]s would be able to hook up with some [[no girls on the internet|hot gamer girls from the internet]], GameCrush was born.
 
'''GameCrush.com''' isn't a dating service but instead a [[brothel]].  [[Basement dweller|Guys]] pay girls to play games with them over the internet.  This premium online service allows [[virgin]]s everywhere to browse through the photo gallery and personality profiles of thousands of [[whore|e-whores]], who will take your money in exchange for some [[pathetic|hot, sexy, one on one ''Halo 3'' action]].
 
==Selecting Your Whore==
<!-- [[File:Gamecrush girl inked.jpg|center|375px|thumb|INKED - "I love gaming co-op! There are NOT enough co op games :( I am really into zombie games and enjoy playing [[Left 4 Dead]] 1 & 2! I can have a foul mouth on occasion when really into gaming, but I still have fun and enjoy myself a lot more when chatting with others! I'm no expert at games but I like to have a good time!"]] -->
<!-- [[File:Gamecrush girl zombunny.jpg|center|450px|thumb|ZOMBUNNY - "I'm a gothboy/gamer and I love the dark side of life. I love putting on makeup and pretty clothes and going out to dance and party with other pretty boys and girls. I also love to tear it up on Gears of War 2..I love blood and chainsaws.And I love pale geeky guys."]] -->
[[File:CWCSweetTransvestite.JPG|center|450px|thumb|[[Chris-chan|Chrissy]] - "I'm totally into the game Little Big Planet."]]
 
 
[[losers|Potential customers]] are able to browse through over 1200 "play date" profiles consisting of fat women and traps, and even chat with the "[[ladies]]" for free.  Play dates have their status listed as either flirty or dirty, so if you're feeling extra adventurous and are looking to squeeze some dirty talk in between MW2 rounds you know who to choose. Once you select your whore, it's a simple matter of buying tokens ($8.25 for 10 minutes on Xbox Live or 6 minutes of flash gaming with a live cam feed) and then [[autistic|you're off to brag to your friends about your hot new gamer girlfriend]].  [[fact|Just kidding, you don't have any friends]].  It's still cheaper than paying for [[blowjobs]], though.
 
==Games Supported==
Currently only a handful of basic flash games on the PC, as well as four Xbox Live games are supported by GameCrush (''Modern Camper 2'', ''[[Gears of War|Queers of War 2]]'', ''[[Halo|Gaylo 3]]'', and [[Grand Theft Auto|GTA4]]).  Not to worry, though — the owners of the escort service [[fail|plan to add Wii, PS3, and WoW support as soon as possible]].  That way you can be sure that [[not gay|the virtual elf ass you're fapping to is actually a girl and not a 40 year old man.]]
 
==New Service==
<center>{{frame|<youtube>IOflZKjvpKk</youtube>|border=#B4E8B0|background=#B4E8B0}}</center>
 
==See Also==
*[[Dying Alone]]
*[[Fail]]
*[[Suicide]]
 
==External Links==
*[http://www.GameCrush.com GameCrush homepage if you have no dignity]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IOflZKjvpKk You can now Pay to Play with a Sexy Man- WTF?]
 
{{Gaming}}
{{Sites}}
{{Timeline|Featured article May 22, [[2010]]|[[Everybody Draw Mohammed Day]] / [[Nightclub]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[MissHannahMinx]]}}

Latest revision as of 00:54, 9 November 2015

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