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Animal abuse: Difference between revisions

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[[Image:HAHAANIMALS.jpg|thumb|right|The [[HA! HA! Guy]] always tells the [[truth]].]]
[[Image:HAHAANIMALS.jpg|thumb|right|The [[HA! HA! Guy]] always tells the [[truth]].]]


[[Image:Lolmouse.gif|thumb|right|deadmau5?]]
Vegans are probably healthier than [[you|YOU]]. However, since [[you]] are probably [[Fat|morbidly obese]], this proves nothing. [[Vegetarian|Vegans]] are easily identified by being grossly [[Pro-Ana|underweight]] and frail from the lack of nutrients and iron that sweet, sweet flesh provides.  They are also prone to wrinkles caused by their constant scowling and anti-lulz.   
Vegans are probably healthier than [[you|YOU]]. However, since [[you]] are probably [[Fat|morbidly obese]], this proves nothing. [[Vegetarian|Vegans]] are easily identified by being grossly [[Pro-Ana|underweight]] and frail from the lack of nutrients and iron that sweet, sweet flesh provides.  They are also prone to wrinkles caused by their constant scowling and anti-lulz.   


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===[[Animal Liberation Front]]===
===[[Animal Liberation Front]]===
A.L.F. (the "Animal Liberation Front") contains all the complete [[insane|psychopaths]] that the two above groups could not contain, so were sent off to a secret training camp in the Rocky Mountains, where they are force fed Animal Planet 24 hours a day and trained to kill farmers and research scientists on sight. So far, they have distributed a large number of [[internet tough guy|death threat]]s towards their would-be foes, but have not done anything but set some meat trucks and science labs on fire and on one particulary lulzy occasion, stole thousands of minks from a farm and released them into the wild. The lucky (and more retarded) minks [[LOL|where hit by cars and killed]] while [[Lulz|the majority where not fortunate enough to get such a quick death and they slowly starved to death]]. The ALF are one of the most sad, pussy, faggoty groups to ever claim the title "terrorist organization", although to be fair they where accidently responsible for the brutal deaths of 95% of the population of Britain in the movie 28 days later when they attempt to save [[Niggers|a bunch of stupid, useless chimps]] being used to test a kickass virus.  
A.L.F. (the "Animal Liberation Front") contains all the complete [[insane|psychopaths]] that the two above groups could not contain, so were sent off to a secret training camp in the Rocky Mountains, where they are force fed Animal Planet 24 hours a day and trained to kill farmers and research scientists on sight. So far, they have distributed a large number of [[internet tough guy|death threat]]s towards their would-be foes, but have not done anything but set some meat trucks and science labs on fire and on one particularly lulzy occasion, stole thousands of minks from a farm and released them into the wild. The lucky (and more retarded) minks [[LOL|where hit by cars and killed]] while [[Lulz|the majority where not fortunate enough to get such a quick death and they slowly starved to death]]. The ALF are one of the most sad, pussy, faggot-infested groups to ever claim the title "terrorist organization", although to be fair they where accidentally responsible for the brutal deaths of 95% of the population of Britain in the movie 28 days later when they attempt to save [[Niggers|a bunch of stupid, useless chimps]] being used to test a kickass virus.  


They are of course, funded by [[PETA]], a truly [[epic]] source of [[lulz]].
They are of course, funded by [[PETA]], a truly [[epic]] source of [[lulz]].
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===Christians===
===Christians===


[[Shit nobody cares about|According to page 156, Article 25-b, paragraph 16 of the Bible]], <s>man has dominion over all animals. Therefore he has a divine mandate to screw with animals. He just can't eat any of the ones that don't have cloven feet, or so my Jewran tells me.</s> Later in the [[Bible|Babble]] it says you can do whatever to animals and eat whatever animals you want.
[[Shit nobody cares about|According to page 156, Article 25-b, paragraph 16 of the Bible]], <s>man has dominion over all animals. Therefore he has a divine mandate to screw with animals. He just can't eat any of the ones that don't have cloven feet, or so my Jewran tells me.</s> Later in the [[Bible|Babble]] it says you can do whatever to animals and eat whatever animals you want and [[women]] have to make men sammiches out of the left overs.  It's not until you get to [[Bible|Leviticus]] that it says that the [[woman|sammich maker]] can't use [[Bacon]] as a topping, use shrimp to make you a yummy po-boy or put cheese on a hamburger.


===The Italians===
===The Italians===
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===The Japanese===
===The Japanese===
[[Japan]] is known for many things; [[hentai]], [[BDSM|bondage porn]], and vending machines that dispense used panties to name a few. However, Japan is also well known for their Animal Rights Laws - or lack thereof. Japanese people enjoy many different kinds of activities that involve the [[lulz]]y mistreatment of animals, such as [[whaling]]. The Japanese have even been known to hunt [[Fat|whales]] that are deemed endangered, but they still do it anyway, because the Japs love their whale blubber. Another event in which the Japs partake is the time-honored tradition of [[Japanese Bug Fighting]]. In this hilarious and awesome competition, various kinds of scary bugs battle each other to the death for honour and glory, and you can even buy your "Battle Bug" from an aforementioned vending machine in the form of a "Gashapon" ball, in which the bugs are enclosed waiting for some little Japanese child to fork out 100 Yen to get his very own bug. They even made an [[Pokemon|rpg based off this]]. Needless to say, it pisses [[PETA]] off a lot. However, since the creatures in question are not [[cute]] and [[furry]], animal rights activists seem to have put this one on the backburner and would rather spend their time saving animals that are a bit more cuddly.
[[Japan]] is known for many things; [[hentai]], [[BDSM|bondage porn]], and vending machines that dispense used panties to name a few. However, Japan is also well known for their Animal Rights Laws - or lack thereof. Japanese people enjoy many different kinds of activities that involve the [[lulz]]y mistreatment of animals, such as [[whaling]]. The Japanese have even been known to hunt [[Fat|whales]] that are deemed endangered, but they still do it anyway, because the Japs love their whale blubber. Another event in which the Japs partake is the time-honored tradition of [[Japanese Bug Fights]]. In this hilarious and awesome competition, various kinds of scary bugs battle each other to the death for honour and glory, and you can even buy your "Battle Bug" from an aforementioned vending machine in the form of a "Gashapon" ball, in which the bugs are enclosed waiting for some little Japanese child to fork out 100 Yen to get his very own bug. They even made an [[Pokemon|RPG based off this]]. Needless to say, it pisses [[PETA]] off a lot. However, since the creatures in question are not [[cute]] and [[furry]], animal rights activists seem to have put this one on the backburner and would rather spend their time saving animals that are a bit more cuddly.


That said, if you're in the area, you might want to make an Ikizukuri run.
That said, if you're in the area, you might want to make an Ikizukuri run.
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===The Chinese===
===The Chinese===
[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2008_South_China_animal_consumption_incidents In 2008, numerous incidents in Southern China]'s Guangdong regions occurred over the selling of dog and cat meat. Both stray and domestic animals were taken to butcher shops in large quantities. Some pet owners even worried their pets had been stolen to be sold for [[PROFIT|pr0fit]].
In all the world, China is the shining paragon of the human right to use and reuse animals. Therefore, stuck-up Westerners love to visit the country to make propaganda about them. A typical example is Sanjay Gupta, a top-caste brown-skinned American better than the rest of us who we sent to their country to rag on them.  He shows typical river scenes probably made with archived footage from Pennsylvania coal country.  He can't believe they eat scorpions and bull penises, then wonders how they'll support four times as many people in the same space as the U.S., then complains they're using more coal and porn I think than the U.S., leading to a terrible shortage for his fellow wankers in the States.  He puts them down because the U.S. has never researched even 1% of the medicines that they use, so they must be bogus, going to special lengths to denounce the use of bear bile that contains deoxycholic acid, because having some butcher take out your gall bladder in order to fix a gallstone leaving you in pain for the rest of your life is so much more advanced than dissolving it with a natural chemical.  Worst of all is the ''freedom'' that Chinese people enjoy to flout laws without being sent away for 20 years on the first offense. Oh, yeah, and they write a menu that says "tiger paws", even if they don't sell them.  This kind of radical democratic thinking would never be allowed back in America, and he wants it stamped out with an iron fist!
 
If he weren't pro-pot (nowadays) I'd have suggested making a catshit pie and going after him like you were Abbie Hoffman.
 


[[Image:Edison-chen-cecelia-cheung-gillian-chung-06.jpg|thumb|right|200px|Chinaman [[Edison Chen]] getting his dick eaten by [[Whore|Gillian Chung]]. Notice Pedobear is present.]]


<center>
<center>
<youtube>eCezy2r7-tE</youtube>
<youtube>eCezy2r7-tE</youtube>
</center>
</center>
[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2008_South_China_animal_consumption_incidents In 2008, numerous incidents in Southern China]'s Guangdong regions occurred over the selling of dog and cat meat. Both stray and domestic animals were taken to butcher shops in large quantities. Some pet owners even worried their pets had been stolen to be sold for [[PROFIT|pr0fit]].
That the Surgeon General was able to restrain a [[WTF]] was pretty amazing.  Pay [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWBzwtVXzXc attention to 0:10 to 0:45].
That the Surgeon General was able to restrain a [[WTF]] was pretty amazing.  Pay [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWBzwtVXzXc attention to 0:10 to 0:45].


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===[[Furries]]===
===[[Furries]]===


Furfags, although [[wtf|dressing up like animals]], consider themselves to be like animals, and claim they [[raep|"love animals"]] are also known animal abusers. As a matter of [[fact]], they are among the [[Bestiality|worse kind of animal abusers]] to spew in every shitty corner of the universe. Most furries won't admit to others of their hideous wet dreams and aspiration of actually having a [[buttsecks|sexual encounter]] with a real animal. For [[Sick Fuck|those brave enough]], they actually will live out their twisted, demeneted fantasy of having sex with an animal, much to its dismay. The others who are too pussy to make their dream come true usually resort to the tactic of drawing [[shit|wonderful]], yet [[traced|original]] [[abortion|works of art]] and post it on sites like [[deviantArt]] and [[4chan]] causing all kinds of rage. And then there are those who can neither draw or fuck an animal. Seeing as they neither possess the skill or courage to draw or rape an innocent animal, they usually resort to getting a plush doll of their favorite furry creature and putting a [[LOLWUT|fuck hole]] or a [[Alix Henriol|dildo]].
 
[[Image:PEDO_furry_cub.jpg|thumb|100px|Sexualizing animals makes them easier to abuse.]]
 
Furfags, although [[wtf|dressing up like animals]], consider themselves to be like animals, and claim they [[raep|"love animals"]] are also known animal abusers. As a matter of [[fact]], they are among the [[Bestiality|worse kind of animal abusers]] to spew in every shitty corner of the universe. Most furries won't admit to others of their hideous wet dreams and aspiration of actually having a [[buttsecks|sexual encounter]] with a real animal. For [[Sick Fuck|those brave enough]], they actually will live out their twisted, demented fantasy of having sex with an animal, much to its dismay. The others who are too pussy to make their dream come true usually resort to the tactic of drawing [[shit|wonderful]], yet [[traced|original]] [[abortion|works of art]] and post it on sites like [[deviantArt]] and [[4chan]] causing all kinds of rage. And then there are those who can neither draw or fuck an animal. Seeing as they neither possess the skill or courage to draw or rape an innocent animal, they usually resort to getting a plush doll of their favorite furry creature and putting a [[LOLWUT|fuck hole]] or a [[Alix Henriol|dildo]].


===The Americans===
===The Americans===
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===The Canadians===
===The Canadians===
Despite their delusions of moral superiority to the US, many Canadians vigorously defend the annual baby seal hunt in which baby seals are clobbered with spiked clubs in front of the animals' mothers until the ground literally runs red with blood.  Despite the fact that much of the world condemns the hunt and seal fur is banned in many countries, the hunt goes on, in large part because it provides work for fishermen in the winter who haven't yet learned that in the twenty-first century computer skills are more useful than hunting and gathering. Canadians are also down for the lulz when it comes to [[Luka Rocco Magnotta|torturing and killing kittens on Christmas eve]].
Despite their delusions of moral superiority to the US, many Canadians vigorously defend the annual baby seal hunt in which baby seals are clobbered with spiked clubs in front of the animals' mothers until the ground literally runs red with blood.  Despite the fact that much of the world condemns the hunt and seal fur is banned in many countries, the hunt goes on, in large part because it provides work for fishermen in the winter who haven't yet learned that in the twenty-first century computer skills are more useful than hunting and gathering. Canadians are also down for the lulz when it comes to [[Luka Rocco Magnotta|torturing and killing kittens on Christmas eve]].
=== How To Argue That It Is Your Right ===
[[Law|Legally]] animals are seen as property and this can be seen in word origins such as how we get cattle (cows) from the word chattle or property.  To claim that an animal has legal rights is a [[lulz|fuck-wit idea]] because, as property, animals are subject to the legal rights of their owner.  As further proof of this, the owner's rights always come first.<br>
The police can't just come and take [[Michael Vick]]'s dog away because he's letting it starve is his back yard.  The rights of the owner must be maintained and a warrant is required to remove the dog because to just take it would be an illegal search and seizure.<br>
So called animal rights laws are unconstitional because they tell someone how they have to treat their property.  Animal Rights Laws are [[conspiracy|an invasion by big government]] into the lives of the common man and are equal to laws being passed saying what colors you are allowed to paint your car.<br>
=== '''Bull Fighting''' ===
Anyone one who has read a Hemingway novel, seen a velvet painting in a barber shop or has a [[penis]] that is 9 inches or better knows the beauty and awe of the [[Spain|Bullfight]].<br>
[[Gay|Faggots]] like Ricky Gervais should be made to hand in their [[balls]] for speaking against them.
<br>
<br>
{{cg||The Bullfight Ernst Haas|Center|<gallery>
Image:Bullfight111.jpg|the Bullfight Ernst Haas
Image:Bullfight222.jpg|The Bullfight Ernst Haas
Image:Bullfight333.jpg|The Bullfight Ernst Haas
</gallery>}}


===BRUTAL SHIT===
===BRUTAL SHIT===
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Image:Boiled alive dogs asians.jpg
Image:Boiled alive dogs asians.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery>
</gallery>|<gallery>
File:Snail maze.jpg|OMFG FUCKING DELETE THIS NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[[Image:Dead cat145.jpg]]
Image:ABUSE_OH_NU.jpg
Image:ABUSE_OH_NU.jpg
File:Squirrellauncher.gif
Image:Crush11.jpg
Image:Crush11.jpg
Image:Fox-hunt.jpg
Image:Fox-hunt.jpg
Image:PigChainsawDecapitation.gif
[[Image:PigChainsawDecapitation.gif]]
Image:toiletwolf.jpg|[[Courage Wolf]] Got pwned
Image:toiletwolf.jpg|[[Courage Wolf]] Got pwned
Image:Oink oink.gif|How Mexican drug cartels deal with treacherous pigs
Image:Oink oink.gif
Image:Zippocatforward.jpg|
Image:Zippocatforward.jpg|
Image:Wet pussy.gif| A Wet [[pussy]]
[[Image:Entrail cat.gif]]
Image:Hammer time.gif|Its Hammer Time!
Image:Hammer time.gif|Its Hammer Time!
Image:Blackshatecats.gif|Niggers Love animal Abuse too.
[[Image:I-love-kitties.gif]]
[[Image:Christcat.jpg]]
[[Image:Sawcat.jpg]]
[[Image:Dog guts.jpg| In [[China]] I'm food!]]
Image:Adorable kitten.jpg
Image:Cleaver.jpg
Image:Cleaver.jpg
Image:Dead dog.jpg
Image:Dead dog.jpg
Image:Hanged dog.jpg|Stage 1 in making a delicious dog sandwich
[[Image:Cat46.jpg]]
Image:Hanged dog.jpg
File:Dog gets hit by a shovel 5 times.gif
Image:Have a slice.jpg
Image:Have a slice.jpg
Image:Infected cat.jpg
[[Image:Pavement cat.jpg]]
Image:Pussy juice.jpg
Image:Roadcat.jpg
Image:Roadkill fapfapfap.jpg
Image:Roadkill fapfapfap.jpg
Image:Skinned dogs.jpg
Image:Skinned dogs.jpg
Image:cute.jpg
Image:cute.jpg
[[Image:Stab.jpg]]
[[Image:Stilletto cat.jpg]]
[[Image:Tubcat.jpg]]
Image:Zippocat.jpg
Image:Zippocat.jpg
[[Image:Trainfatality.jpg]]
Image:Cancercat.jpg
Image:Cat51.jpg
Image:Cat51.jpg
Image:Lolmouse.gif|[[lulz|Wil it blend?]]
Image:Cat45.jpg
Image:Shovel_Dog.gif|"I said sit!!"
Image:Cat42.jpg
[[Image:Cat33.jpg]]
[[Image:Cat29.jpg]]
Image:Cat24.jpg
Image:Cat20.jpg
Image:Lolmouse.gif|[[lulz|Will it blend?]]
Image:Cat's Corpse.jpg|Maggot food
[[Image:Bloody_dead_mouse.JPG]]
Image:Shovel_Dog.gif
</gallery>}}
</gallery>}}


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''[[Cats]]''
''[[Cats]]''
* [[Kenny Glenn The Animal Abuser]]
* [[NEDM]]
* [[NEDM]]
* [[Wang Jeu]]
* [[Wang Jeu]]
* [[Jewcat]] - Attempting to convert your cat to [[Judaism]] constitutes [[extreme]] animal cruelty
* [[Jewcat]] - Attempting to convert your cat to [[Judaism]] constitutes [[extreme]] animal cruelty
* [[Amber Baird]]




''Groups and Organizations''
''Groups and Organizations''


* [[PETA]]
* [[Animal Liberation Front]]
* [[Animal Liberation Front]]
* [[Cutoutdissection.com]]
* [[Earth First]]
* [[Earth First]]
* [[Greenpeace]]
* [[Greenpeace]]
* [[Cutoutdissection.com]]
* [[PETA]]




''People''
''People''
 
* [[Amber Baird]]
* [[Dalavesta]] - Fucks dogs and calls it an addiction.
* [[Dalavesta]] - Fucks dogs and calls it an addiction.
* [[Gary yourofsky]]
* [[Gary Yourofsky]]
* [[Kenny Glenn The Animal Abuser]]
* [[Kero the Wolf]]
* [[Luka Magnotta]]
* [[Michael Vick]] Make dogs fight for [[gambling|money]] and still keep your job with the NFL.