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Lemmings: Difference between revisions
imported>Lolyunohavgudsoftware No edit summary |
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'''Lemmings''' is a video game for the mentally disabled, ported onto every fucking 90's console in existence, and was programmed by [[Prick|David Jones]], the same creepy fucknut who would later produce the [[Grand Theft Auto]] series. The goal of the game is to safely guide a colony of severely retarded, [[Anime|green-haired]] [[Democrat|democrats]] called "Lemmings" through a hazardous obstacle course to the goal. [[Basement dweller|The player]] is given a limited amount of Skillz he can allocate to a particular Lemming [[AIDS|aiding]] in the completion of each stage. This game spawned a fuck-ton of unnecessary sequels, remakes, and fan-made spin-offs; [[Pac-Man|typical of a simplistic video game]] like this. | |||
{ | |||
==Skills== | |||
In order to send all the lemmings to the exit safety, the player must use [[List of sex moves|various skills]]. The original game had eight skills. These skills include: | |||
{| style= "width:100%; text-align:center;" border="2" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="2" | |||
|- | |||
|style= "text-align:center; width: 25%;"|[[File:LemmingsClimber.png|150px]] | |||
|style= "text-align:center; width: 25%;"|[[File:LemmingsFloater.png|150px]] | |||
|style= "text-align:center; width: 25%;"|[[File:LemmingsExploder.png|150px]] | |||
|style= "text-align:center; width: 25%;"|[[File:LemmingsBlocker.png|150px]] | |||
|- | |||
|style= "text-align:center;"|'''[[Spiderman|Climber]] <span class="co;[Click to collapse];[Click to expand];0;Climber"></span>''' | |||
|style= "text-align:center;"|'''[[Poop|Floater]] <span class="co;[Click to collapse];[Click to expand];0;Floater"></span>''' | |||
|style= "text-align:center;"|'''[[Terrorist|Bomber]] <span class="co;[Click to collapse];[Click to expand];0;Bomber"></span>''' | |||
|style= "text-align:center;"|'''[[Republican|Blocker]] <span class="co;[Click to collapse];[Click to expand];0;Blocker"></span>''' | |||
|} | |||
<div class="Climber"> | |||
===Climber=== | |||
Climbs up vertical walls like a boss. | |||
</div> | |||
<div class="Floater"> | |||
===Floater=== | |||
Uses an umbrella when [[Suicide|dropping from lethal heights]] to save itself from making a gruesome mess on the floor. | |||
</div> | |||
<div class="Bomber"> | |||
===Bomber=== | |||
Strap a C4 to this motherfucker and watch it go '''*BOOM*''', destroying a small sector of the stage terrain. | |||
</div> | |||
<div class="Blocker"> | |||
===Blocker=== | |||
This Lemming serves to [[Cockblock|block]] the other Lemmings from travelling any further, thus causing them to [[Fuck off|turn 180 degrees and walk away]]. | |||
</div> | |||
{| style= "width:100%; text-align:center;" border="2" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="2" | |||
|- | |||
|style= "text-align:center; width: 25%;"|[[File:LemmingsBuilder.png|150px]] | |||
|style= "text-align:center; width: 25%;"|[[File:LemmingsBasher.png|150px]] | |||
|style= "text-align:center; width: 25%;"|[[File:LemmingsMiner.png|150px]] | |||
|style= "text-align:center; width: 25%;"|[[File:LemmingsDigger.png|150px]] | |||
|- | |||
|style= "text-align:center;"|'''[[Under Construction|Builder]] <span class="co;[Click to collapse];[Click to expand];0;Builder"></span>''' | |||
|style= "text-align:center;"|'''[[Bash|Basher]] <span class="co;[Click to collapse];[Click to expand];0;Basher"></span>''' | |||
|style= "text-align:center;"|'''[[Underage|Miner]] <span class="co;[Click to collapse];[Click to expand];0;Miner"></span>''' | |||
|style= "text-align:center;"|'''[[Nigger|Digger]] <span class="co;[Click to collapse];[Click to expand];0;Digger"></span>''' | |||
|} | |||
<div class="Builder"> | |||
===Builder=== | |||
This Lemming will decide to build a staircase until he is out of equipment. That's literally it. | |||
</div> | |||
<div class="Basher"> | |||
===Basher=== | |||
Destroys the shit out of anything [[Fail|except metal]], carving a long tunnel through large boulders and leaving them to [[Minecraft|float in mid-air]]. | |||
</div> | |||
<div class="Miner"> | |||
===Miner=== | |||
Essentially the same as a Basher, but will tunnel diagonally. | |||
</div> | |||
<div class="Digger"> | |||
== | ===Digger=== | ||
Digs a [[Goatse|huge hole]] into the ground because he can. | |||
</div> | |||
=== | ==Anonymous' opinion on Lemmings== | ||
{{Squote|1=i hate lemmings, all you do is die.|2=[[Anonymous]]|3=[http://4chanarchive.org/brchive/dspl_thread.php5?thread_id=49188102&x=++++i+hate+pc+games+all+u+do+is+click#49191150]}} | |||
{{Squote|1=Our geography teacher was convinced that lemmings do commit mass suicide.|2=[[Anonymous]] ('''Protip:''' Don't ask [[Wikipedia|Geography teachers]] biologic questions)|3=[http://4chanarchive.org/brchive/dspl_thread.php5?thread_id=278448&x=Dumbest+Shit+Youve+Ever+Heard-sci+Edition#279650]}} | |||
{{Squote|1=(USER MADE LEMMINGS GO "OH NOES!")|2=[[Anonymous]]|3=[http://4chanarchive.org/brchive/dspl_thread.php5?thread_id=38870824&x=user+was...#38877208]}} | |||
{{Squote|1=Lemmings. Fucking win game.|2=[[Anonymous]]|3=[http://4chanarchive.org/brchive/dspl_thread.php5?thread_id=49696556&x=the+early+internet#49712265]}} | |||
==Nostalgia threads== | ==Nostalgia threads== | ||
| Line 49: | Line 118: | ||
<gallery> | <gallery> | ||
File:Amiga Lemmings.png|The Game itself. | File:Amiga Lemmings.png|The Game itself. | ||
File:Lemming.png|Lemming Blocker. | |||
File:Lemmingscaek.jpg|[[Cake|The mission objective]]. | File:Lemmingscaek.jpg|[[Cake|The mission objective]]. | ||
</gallery> | </gallery> | ||
| Line 54: | Line 124: | ||
==See also== | ==See also== | ||
*[[Sheep]] | *[[Sheep]] | ||
*[[Suicide]] | |||
==External links== | ==External links== | ||
*[[wikipedia:Lemmings (video game)|Lemmings]] on [[TOW]] | *[http://www.oldgames.dk/freeflashgames/arcadegames/playlemmings.php Play it online, right here, ya Goddamn Nostalgiafaggot.] | ||
*[http://www.lemmingsuniverse.net/ Lemmings Universe] – Yes, there's a Lemmings Fandom | *[[wikipedia:Lemmings (video game)|Lemmings]] on [[TOW]]. | ||
*[http://www.lemmingsuniverse.net/ Lemmings Universe] – Yes, there's a Lemmings Fandom. | |||
{{Memes}} | {{Memes}} | ||
{{Gaming}} | {{Gaming}} | ||
Latest revision as of 04:30, 5 February 2016
Lemmings is a video game for the mentally disabled, ported onto every fucking 90's console in existence, and was programmed by David Jones, the same creepy fucknut who would later produce the Grand Theft Auto series. The goal of the game is to safely guide a colony of severely retarded, green-haired democrats called "Lemmings" through a hazardous obstacle course to the goal. The player is given a limited amount of Skillz he can allocate to a particular Lemming aiding in the completion of each stage. This game spawned a fuck-ton of unnecessary sequels, remakes, and fan-made spin-offs; typical of a simplistic video game like this.
Skills
In order to send all the lemmings to the exit safety, the player must use various skills. The original game had eight skills. These skills include:
| Climber | Floater | Bomber | Blocker |
Climber
Climbs up vertical walls like a boss.
Floater
Uses an umbrella when dropping from lethal heights to save itself from making a gruesome mess on the floor.
Bomber
Strap a C4 to this motherfucker and watch it go *BOOM*, destroying a small sector of the stage terrain.
Blocker
This Lemming serves to block the other Lemmings from travelling any further, thus causing them to turn 180 degrees and walk away.
| Builder | Basher | Miner | Digger |
Builder
This Lemming will decide to build a staircase until he is out of equipment. That's literally it.
Basher
Destroys the shit out of anything except metal, carving a long tunnel through large boulders and leaving them to float in mid-air.
Miner
Essentially the same as a Basher, but will tunnel diagonally.
Digger
Digs a huge hole into the ground because he can.
Anonymous' opinion on Lemmings
—Anonymous (Protip: Don't ask Geography teachers biologic questions), [2] |
Nostalgia threads
Moar info: Nostalgia Thread.
Due to its age and poor graphics, Lemmings are often mentioned within Nostalgia threads. Like anything else mentioned in a nostalgia thread, Lemmings is treated as a vintage of fine wine. Knowledge of this game shows that one is a connoisseur of the fine facets of the 90s.
Applied to human beings
Certain humans display lemming-like characteristics. They follow the crowd and do whatever their peers tell them so. In fact, a common idiom used to argue to conformers is "If someone told you to jump off a cliff, would you?" Lemmings dress the same, talk the same, and listen to the same music. Bloggers generally use "lemming" as an insult to people that don't conform to their own beliefs. Linux supporters call Micro$oft fans "lemmings", and vice versa. Republicans call Obama's followers "lemmings", and Democrats call Reagan worshipers "lemmings" as well.
4chan is a magnet for a class of lemmings called Newfags. These lemmings overuse memes and post unoriginal image macros in order to be accepted by the rest of the Anonymous collective, and they usually fail. Lemmings such as those are often blamed for memes lasting for years instead of weeks, and for the last of OC. Scientists has recently discovered lemmings to be a major cause for Internet cancer.
Gallery
-
The Game itself.
-
Lemming Blocker.
See also
External links
- Play it online, right here, ya Goddamn Nostalgiafaggot.
- Lemmings on TOW.
- Lemmings Universe – Yes, there's a Lemmings Fandom.
|
Lemmings is part of a series on Visit the Memes Portal for complete coverage. |
|
Lemmings is part of a series on Visit the Gaming Portal for complete coverage. |