View source for Reptoid

{{notice|''Not to be confused with: [[Scalies|Human retards who disguise themselves as reptiles for mating purposes]]''}}
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[[File:Trump surrounded by reptoids.jpg|thumb|right|400px|They run the show.]]

'''Reptoids''' are an inter-dimensional race disguising themselves as human beings, which have infiltrated the global power structures [[for the lulz|to enslave the human race]] and turn all of us into Reptoid [[food]] via a process known as involuntary Organ Harvesting <b> THEY WANT YOUR TASTY [[Liver|LIVER]] </b>.

[[Some argue]] that the only ones capable of seeing Reptoids are [[psychic]]s, although by way of employing [[tinfoil hats]] one could conceivably disrupt [[Fox News|thought-control beams]] long enough to sneak a glance at a Reptoid during [[Power Rangers|it's morph-in-time]].

In collusion with the [[Illuminati]], the Reptoids are second only to [[Jews]] in their malevolence, and as the ones responsible for Candlejack, the Re

Reptoids are known to live in giant underground cave complexes, where they spend guv'ment moneys on their extensive furcadia accounts.  They have been seen with wings, horns, homosexual bumper stickers, and at Obama rallies.  They regularly rape Tom to create their alien-reptile-human hybrids, then force their inbred flippered children into slave labor camps, where they spend all their time updating the reptoids' myspace pages.  

Reptoids were first [[Schizophrenia|discovered]] (some close-minded sheeple would say "invented") by the [[profit|prophet]] named [[David Icke]] [[at least 100 years ago]]. It is through his diligent [[drug abuse|research]] that we now know that taking our children to day care will result in them being [http://www.bibliotecapleyades.net/biggestsecret/matrix/matrix15.htm ritualistically raped and tortured by Satanic lizard-men], [[Jews|reptoids]] did 9/11, that [[slowpoke|we're all just slaves to the man]] and that the only way we'll ever save ourselves from bondage to our evil reptilian overlords is to [[hippie|love one another unconditionally and always send positive energy into the world]] (because that's always worked before, amirite?). If you ever have the misfortune or mental disorder to read his books and are clever enough to read between the lines, it becomes quite clear that when he says "reptoid" he ''really'' means Jew.

== Human-Suits ==
[[Image:RaptorJesus2.jpg|thumb|200px|[[Raptor Jesus|The original Reptoid]]]]
Reptoids are known to wear human-suits in order to conserve energy. When a politician takes the spotlight it is usually because a Reptoid has [[blowjob|sucked]] out their [[tubgirl|innards]] and used their [[cum|skin]] as a jelloey suit so they can [[rofl|silence]] [[everyone|dissent]]. Fortunately, their disguises can be rumbled by any basement-dwelling pothead making some small tweaks with Photoshop. Typical alien invaders, always overlook something small but crucial.
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{{frame|<gallery>
Image:Reptoid_paul1.jpg|1) Save a JPEG with high compression
Image:Reptoid_paul2.jpg|2) Apply the solarize filter
Image:Reptoid_paul3.jpg|3) Apply the find edges filter to detect the shapeshifting lines
</gallery>|border=#2b6519|background=#ccb323}}
</center>
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== How To Spot One ==
<big>'''OMG <s>MPEG COMPRESSION ARTIFACTS</s>  REPTILIANS CAUGHT SHAPESHIFTING'''</big>
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<center>{{frame|{{fv|JoneRants|background-color:white;|font-weight: bold;
|<youtube>LIALzT3uHAU</youtube><center>'''OMG HE WALKS AWAY AS HE IS SHAPESHIFTING! PROOF!'''</center>
|<youtube>NveOvHvlawo</youtube><center>'''Note the [[Donnie Darko]] music.'''</center>
|<youtube>ZB0kV2z38pY</youtube><center>'''His tongue moves too fast for [[an hero|an human.]]'''</center>
|<youtube>dwKcjRD1DNE</youtube><center>'''This video [[USI|made the world aware of space lizards.]]'''</center>
|<youtube>bVIglDQpb50</youtube><center>'''Licking your lips=OMG [[W]] IS A REPTILE!'''</center>
|<youtube>wu77YbjTa38</youtube><center>'''A mindless, fluoride drinking sheeple tries to debunk the reptoids.'''</center>
}}|border=#2b6519|background=#ccb323}}</center>

== Gallery ==
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<center>

{{frame|<center><gallery perrow=4>
Image:Gorn star trek.jpg|A standard reptoid...
Image:Thehorror.jpg|[[Michael Jackson|and one with boobs!]]
Image:McCain Grin.jpg|A [[retard|redtoid]] here.
Image:Obama Grin.jpg|And a black person one too!
</gallery><gallery perrow=5>
File:Reptoid mark arbib (president, athletics australia).png
Image:Lizard_Queen.jpg|God save the reptilian queen.
Image:Davidickelizard.jpg|OH SHI-
File:Hillary clinton reptoid unmasked.jpg|Phew! What a relief
File:Kellyanne conway and steve bannon reptoids in disguise.jpg
</gallery></center>|border=#2b6519|background=#ccb323}}
</center>

== See Also ==
[[Image:Duracell matrix.jpg|thumb|500px|In order to change a [[NORP|human being]] into [[lulz|this]].]]
*[[Jews]]
*[[Illuminati]]
*[[Otherkin]]
*[[Furries]]
*[[Aliens]]
*[[David Icke]]
*[[Truthism.com]]
*[[They Live]]
*[[Gorilla199]]
*[[Xee-A Twelve]]

=== Known Reptoids ===

*[[George bush]]
*[[Barack Obama]]
*[[Justin Beiber]]
*[[Jerry Seinfeld]]

== External Links ==

* [http://www.whitehouse.gov Reptilian homepage]
* http://www.reptoids.com/


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