View source for Operation SyPhyllis

{{spoiler|Oprah rigs vote in favor of African American}}
Zach Anner is a fine young man from [[Texas|Austin, Texas]], who in mid-2010 decided to take part in a contest held by [[Oprah Winfrey]] to win a [[Old_Media|television talk show]]. Zach was also born with [[Retard|cerebral palsy]] (the sexiest of the palsies) and confined to a wheelchair, which makes everything he does at least 100x more [[hilarious]]. The online contest was [[dumb|structured]] as such that each contestant had to submit an entry video, which would then be voted on by the [[basement_dwellers|online community]], with the top five contestants then being flown to [[LA]] to be judged by God of [[feminist|Feminazi's]] Oprah and her [[cult|sycophantic followers]]. The rules of the online contest [[dumb|allow]] individuals to vote an unlimited amount of times, [[LOL|however bot-voting is frowned upon]]. 

The [[internets]] immediately [[pretty_cool_guy|approved of his entry (and his entire persona)]] and rallied full force behind him, with the likes of [[B|/b/]] and [[Fag|John Mayer]] very vocally throwing their approval to his corner. In fact, support for Zach is one of the few things (aside from a hatred of [[niggers]] and love of [[loli]]) that /b/ has ever been nearly unanimous on.

This overwhelming support rapidly built a significant amount of online [[attention|buzz]], and was reported first in the [[blogosphere]], then by [[old media]] outlets, who always love a story about a retard making good. [[Google]] search results were rife with Zach Anner stories. The buzz quickly translated into votes, and within a week Zach was [[winrar|comfortably in first place]], with a gap of [[Over_9000|over a million votes]] separating him from his closest competitor. [[W|Mission accomplished]].

But the story does not end there. In mid-June of 2010, the [[loser|then-third-place]] contestant who went by the name of black person (who happens to be black), mysteriously began rising in the votes at an [[cheating|alarming and inexplicable rate]]. She rose from third place to second place inside of two days, and then began closing in on the beloved Zach, despite what had seemed just days before like an insurmountable lead. Finally, she overtook him (and then some), by adding well over a million votes inside of just one day. This was particularly remarkable as literally nobody had ever heard of 'Dr. Phyllis' (aka Phyllis Tucker-Wicks), including Google.  

This of course alarmed [[anonymous]], who, strongly suspecting [[Crimes|foul play]], immediately donned their [[tinfoil hats]] and launched an [[internet_detective|investigation]]. Amazingly enough, this time it seemed that they were actually on to something, as it was discovered that an additional script had been placed in Dr. Phyllis' vote button which may have radically increased her vote count. Additional research into the vote patterns' raw data seemed to corroborate this theory, and anon proceeded to go completely ape shit over the discovery that Zach was in fact being royally screwed out of first place, and more importantly the fact that for the first time in internets [[history]], one of their [[conspiracy theories]] may have actually been correct.

Due to the [[Rage|extreme, burning desire]] on the part of anon for [[Great_justice|justice]] to be done to both Phyllis' and Oprah's respective [[fat|asses]], Operation SyPhillis was born. 


==Tactics==
The first plot hatched by anon was intended to bring down the website which was hosting the contest. The legions of anon amassed their [[LOIC|LOICs]] and prepared to [[DDoS]] the shit out of myown.oprah.com with a barrage of righteous firepower. Unfortunately, it turned out to be little more than a barrage of [[fail]], as Oprah's tech team [[hackers_on_steroids|fully have their shit together]] and not a dent was made. It was also speculated that [[Derp|a good portion of anon were hitting the wrong IP address]], which probably didn't help matters. Either way, not a fucking dent.  

Moving along to plan B, it was decided that anon would [[Logic|fight cheating with more cheating]], and quickly organized a massive bot-voting effort in order to bring Zach back up to his rightfully deserved [[winrar|first place position]]. This effort was decidedly more successful, as Zachs votes grew like the [[Penis|mighty oak]], and although Phyllis' votes were also rising to now-absurd levels, anon finally managed to push Zach back into [[WIN|first place once again]].

At this point, anon was also [[Google bombing]] search terms like [[Truth|'Oprah rigs votes against Zach Anner']], and [[lulz|'Oprah hates the disabled']], with media outlets both online and offline beginning to pick up this story as well. With even more buzz building around Zach and the contest, this time related to the [[Fact|alleged vote-rigging]], anon discovered that the vote script had been removed from the 'Dr. Phyllis' button and her vote rate dropped significantly, returning to the level it was at before the script had been added in the first place [[Fail|(nowhere near enough to compete with Zach)]].



==Shitstorms, Shitstorms Everywhere==
The immediate result of these valiant efforts was of course that Zach regained his top spot. But the [[blowback]] from the implication that an Oprah contest may have actually been rigged (against a super-cool disabled person, no less) was significant. The Oprah people quickly released a vague statement of acknowledgment:


{{quote|The online voting rules for the ‘Your OWN Show’ video submission competition were carefully crafted to be fair to everyone. Any allegations of impropriety will be investigated and the appropriate actions taken to keep the process unbiased.|The Oprah PR machine in action. [[Not|Money well spent]].}}


Meanwhile, the rest of the internet was alight with [[Flame_wars|lively discussion]] regarding the [[bullshit|legitimacy]] of the contest and its rules, the [[Fact|likelihood that team Oprah had hand-picked 'Dr. Phyllis' as a forgone conclusion]], as well as the suspicion that the entire controversy was nothing but a big [[hoax]] being perpetrated by those all-powerful [[God|internet gods]] at [[4chan]] (This is particularly funny, as its been [[Science|scientifically]] proven that 94% of [[b-tards|4chan regulars]] aren't even qualified to tie their own shoe laces. The other 6% [[basement_dweller|don't leave the house]] enough to even warrant ownership of shoes). Despite this, some consensus seems to have developed:


1. The rules of this contest are completely fucked. 

2. Team Oprah never expected the contest to get much attention beyond her core fan base of fat soccer moms and gay black men. 

3. Because of this, they never in a million years expected a guy like Zach to actually win, and have no idea what to do with him.

4. Zach totally deserves to win, and earned the votes that put him into first place originally. 

5. Did I mention the rules of this contest are completely fucked? Because they are.

6. It's not beyond the realm of possibility to imagine that an overzealous flack on Team Oprah had the votes tampered with in order to help push a more brand-friendly contestant into first place.

7. 4chan did something, somewhere. Nobody can explain what though. Especially not [http://www.geekosystem.com/4chan-not-happy-with-us-about-oprah-vote-gaming-story-followup Geekosystem]. 

8. Dr. Phyllis is a good cure for insomnia. 


<center>
{{morphquote|rusrsquotes||
|Oprah NOT Rigging Votes Against Zach Anner|[[Leftard|Huffington Post]], displaying the kind of [[lying|firm grasp on reality]] which has made them famous|DUDE I LOVE U ZACH!!!!! I VOTED FOR YOU.... JOHN MAYER SENT ME HERE BTW! TAKE HIS SONG FOR UR SHOW U WONT REGRET IT! I LUVV JOHN & ZACH! <333|[[16-year-old-girl|Candace24]], who knows [[Capslock|how to make a point]]|If I were on the legal team for OWN, I'd be gearing up for libel suits right about now. Going before the judge and yelling "but we think they rigged it first!" isn't going to get you very far.|[[Faggot|Whiteknight123]], on bringing [[Serious_business|defamation lawsuits]] against [[anon]] and not at all being [[retarded]]|I've no idea what anyone on this page is talking about...although I have heard of Oprah and I'll take her side of the argument if she gives me a new car.|Raven419, talking some sense|Oprah can't handle true talent & needs to rig everything.|Sumbodee, via Huffpost|Anonymous routinely calls people trolls when they out them. Since you haven't provided any [[your_argument_is_invalid|valid arguments to justify the rigging 4chan did, I don't see much reason in taking anything you're saying seriously]]. It can't be wrong for one side to do it but not the other. And before you tell me Oprah did it herself, provide something more than [[photoshopped]] graphs to back it up with.|[[Faggot|Whiteknight123]], like its his job|Rounding up people on [[4chan]] to spam votes is one thing, they aren't running the contest. Oprah on the other hand is running the contest, and if she is playing favorites, what it is the point of the contest.|Angelus2007, getting the [[point]]|Seriously? Is it just me or is [[Yes|4chan becoming the scapegoat of the internet]]? Obvious attempt by Opera herself to divert attention from her own little voting scandal. Well the internet isn’t that stupid Ms. Winfrey, nice try though.|Exodus2112, vastly overestimating the intelligence of the internet|Zach Anner Fans Admit 4Chan “Rigged” Oprah Votes In Zach’s Favor|[http://www.geekosystem.com/zach-anner-4chan-oprah-vote-rigging/ Geekosystem], being completely [[wrong]]|I expect full apologies from all who said I was full of it or making things up or whatever.|[[Faggot|Whiteknight123]], [[butthurt|holding his breath until he turns blue]]|Disgusting. I remember when news sites would do more than take any photoshopped image form a random source and slap it on their page. It looks completely fake. Oprah is the one who is messing around with the votes.|Zage513, who is clearly the [[old|oldest]] man on the internet|[[Ebaumsworld]] did it|At last, the [[truth]] comes out!}}</center>


So ultimately we're left with Zach back in first place, Dr. Phyllis pretty much in hiding as she's made no statement whatsoever on the controversy (probably in fear of [[lynching]] at this point), and Oprah is left with the stench of a [[clusterfuck|horribly tainted contest]] which she now has to see through to [[Do_not_want|completion]]. The online community is also maintaining the status quo of [[batshit]] and never ending flame wars, the most entertaining of which can be found over at the [http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/06/22/oprah-rigs-votes-zach-anner_n_621729.html Huffington Post] of all places, where they've helpfully concluded that [[Lie|Oprah was NOT rigging the votes]], [[ignorant|because of the aforementioned Google bomb]] (???). This of course completely [[ignore|ignores]] the embedded vote script [[Duh|(as well as the fact that a Google bomb has no effect on, you know, voting)]]. All that aside, however, the truly entertaining part of that article is a particularly [[epic]] [[troll]] in the comments by the name of [[Faggot|WhiteKnight123]], who has literally been all up in that article 24 hours a day since it was written on June 22, posting nearly immediate anti-Zach and anti-anon comments in response to anyone who even vaguely sounds suspicious of Oprah or 'Dr. Phyllis'. Worth a visit for epic counter-troll lulz.


<center>
{{fv|UNIQUE ID|background-color:#ffffff;|font-weight: bold;
|<youtube>T_35KKa3b1c</youtube>
'''The video that started it all.''' 
|<youtube>qqzh-9wkHu8</youtube>
'''He really is quite talented''' 
|<youtube>7mQ2UkURtMk</youtube>
'''OMG John Mayer <3<3<3<3'''
|<youtube>bG0_rnkRiM8</youtube>
'''What the balls??!!!'''
|<youtube>8hxgPqqRbvk</youtube>
'''Even the retards at ABC love Zach'''
|<youtube>1vi46E5aOqM</youtube>
'''Stephen Hawking jokes! Well, its Fox.''' 
|<youtube>yQmxgmY1zCo</youtube>
'''Ummm... Ok?'''
|<youtube>IKN6BpvJ8yw</youtube>
'''Fox <3's Zach Anner, apparently.'''
<br />}}
</center>


==Success?==
[[Great_success|Success!]] Operation SyPhillis did exactly what it was supposed to do; call attention to the voting irregularities and simultaneously get Zach back into the first place position, where he should have been all along, as well as [[Win|embarrass the fuck out of Oprah]]. Anon was not 'cheating' in that 'Dr. Phyllis' was never truly a first place candidate, and Zach was. Anon did not tamper with the original voting... fact is, John Mayer and all his other publicity got Zach more votes than 4chan ever could have thought possible at that point; anon simply [[good|corrected a wrong]]. Unfortunately, having done their good deed, now the only thing worse than a [[Hell|Dr. Phyllis reality show]] will be the perpetual handjob anon will be giving themselves over the fact that they were actually [[loser|successful]] at something for the first time in their collective lives.


==UPDATE 7/5/2010==
The voting has officially ended, and the following message has been added to the contest pages:

{{quote|'''Special Announcement:''' The votes are all in! Please note the vote tallies are [[Lies|UNOFFICIAL]] and are subject to verification to ensure compliance with the video submission competition [[bullshit|Participation Terms]]. Please be patient as we [[cheat|tally and verify the votes]]. We will announce the top five vote getters sometime this week! Keep checking back to see who joins the other group of finalists from which we will cast Your OWN Show!|[[Niggers|The OWN Network]], buying time while they [[Cheating|fuck with the results]]}} 

I guess we'll have to wait and see [[ass_rape|just how badly Zach gets screwed]].


=='Surprise' Results - 7/11/2010==

<br>
{{rainbowpyramid|ZACH LOSES!}}
<br>
<br>


[[Image:Votedifference.jpg|center|thumb|800px]]
<center>'''HOLY FUCKING SHIT ZACH LOSES!!!1!11'''</center>



On July 9, 2010 the OWN network released their final [[Bullshit|vote tally]], revealing the winners and [[You|losers]] of the online [[clusterfuck|contest]]. To the shock of many (but not all), Zach finished not in first or second, but rather seventh place (and essentially out of the running), having been stripped of [[Holocaust|over six million votes]]. On top of this, the top two contestants (whom nobody has ever heard of), seem to have actually had votes [[WTF|ADDED]] to their totals after the voting was closed. black person and [[Camwhore|Jacqueline Wattimo]] (who were the top two after Zach during the contest) were awarded the top spots, keeping every single obvious automated vote that they managed to rack up during the contest and then some, with 8,453,803 and 9,360,096 respectively. 

This is of course completely [[batshit]], and a transparent and seriously [[retarded|hamfisted]] way to get Zach out of their contest once and for all. Automated voting was obviously rampant throughout the last couple of weeks of the contest, with all the top contenders getting their positions padded with outright ludicrous numbers of votes. Why was Zach the only contestant to be [[castration|penalized]] for this? Why would they want to take the ONLY person in their contest with a built-in following and a ton of publicity and simply discard him? [[Logic|Wouldn't it be better]] for their contest and ultimately their show to embrace this sort of thing and, you know, take advantage of it? Why attempt to [[dumb|downplay his popularity]]?


'''Zach isn't 'on-brand' for Oprah, and they have no idea what to do with him.'''

The Oprah brand consists of pandering to [[soccer moms]] who hate their lives and [[gay]] [[niggers|black men]] who worship Oprah like she's some empowering, kitschy goddess. This means shows about things that no [[celebrities|sane human could possibly be interested in]], interspersed with cheap stunts like [[Jew_gold|free cars]] for her audience. Zach is a quasi-hipster smartass in a wheelchair. He's totally random and [[awesome]] (and seems like a really nice guy too), but the [[asspies|deep thinkers]] over at the OWN network would probably rather poke their own eyes out with a rusty pocketknife than try to figure out a way to market him to their current demographic (and have no interest in, or ability to, [[smart|expand that demographic]]). 


'''Oprah has a grudge against Anonymous.'''

Zach was obviously the favorite of [[anon]]. They helped a great deal in getting his buzz started, and really like him. Despite reports that anon was just promoting him for the [[lulz]] of getting a dude in a wheelchair on TV, the fact is that (much like [[cats]]), Zach is one of the few things anon has embraced [[irony|unironically]]. 

Now, Oprah likely has a huge [[erection|grudge]] against anon, because she was the victim of an [[epic|epic trolling]] [[last Thursday]] when she announced on national television a claim by a particularly [[smart|gifted]] anon that [[Oprah|'over 9000 penises were raping children']]. To be sure, [[anti-lulz|neither her nor her staff appreciated that very much]], and one wouldn't be surprised if they were using Zach as some kind of retribution. The ultimate [[irony]] of this, however, is that originally Oprah was just a random target of opportunity, which anon quickly moved on from. The Zach situation is an [[war|escalation which is likely to maintain anon's attention for a while]]. 


'''This 'contest' was engineered from the start, and Zach was just a distraction.'''

The entire 'contest' was likely a sham from day one, with the results a forgone conclusion. How else can you explain the hundreds of entries, with a few getting millions of votes, and the rest being virtually ignored? With the exception of Zach, can anyone honestly say that [[No|there is a vast difference between the winner, Jacqueline Wattimo, and pretty much any other random soccer-mom video that was submitted]]? How did she get ten million votes? The only way to get those kinds of votes would be to go viral, and the only video from that entire contest to go viral was Zach's. None of the others got any publicity or buzz at all, so how do you explain it? Unless of course the contest was [[cheating|rigged from the start]] and Zach was an unexpected (and unwelcome) distraction.

The [[truth|bottom line]] is that this 'contest' was always designed to just be some [[magic|smoke and mirrors]] to entertain the Oprah [[retards|core audience]], not an [[internet phenomenon]] (or even a real competition). The OWN network had zero interest in making their website a treehouse for 4chan or John Mayer fans or the rest of the random internet ether. As soon as Zach started to get [[Iron Man Numbers|serious numbers]] of votes and viral internet publicity, the [[Asspies|marketing wizards]] who were [[Mods|running things]] began to sweat, as they were clearly losing control of their creation. And if there's one thing that the Oprah brand enjoys, its [[Nazi|control over its message]]. So they took the [[Derp|clumsy and obvious action]] of rapidly jacking up Dr. Phyllis and Jacqueline's votes [[Steroids|artificially]], and when that didn't work, they just [[cut]] Zach's total in the final count. Why wouldn't they? [[Cult|Her audience views Oprah as their God anyway]], so if she says the contest is fair, its a safe bet that they'll all just nod in agreement. The ability and intention to manipulate the votes was of course built into the contest from the beginning, as no good [[Satan|marketing person]] would ever leave something like this up to the internet alone, but had Zach not entered the contest and brought all this scrutiny with him, they would not have had to do it in such an [[obvious]] way and nobody ever would have known. 


'''Oprah hates disabled people.'''

Yes, I'm afraid this is true. You can spread the word on this truth by [[Google_bomb|Google-bombing]] the search term plzkthx.

==Internets Reaction==
[[Image:Oprah Hitler.jpg|center|thumb|400px]]
<center>Pretty much sums it up.</center>


The internet of course is somewhat [[butthurt|aghast]] at this [[Shit_nobody_cares_about|gross miscarriage of justice]], with some calling for a boycott of Kohls (the sponsor of the contest) and others just being generally [[rage|pissed off]] that for once it looked like an underdog may actually pull through, but ended up [[I_am_dissapoint|inexplicably crushed anyway]]. It remains to be seen if any real action will come of this, either on the part of anon, or from the general media. 


{{quote|We demand an explanation... how can Zach suddenly lose six million votes overnight?|Jennifer Gleason, oblivious of Oprah's massive [[holocaust|gas chamber]]}}

{{quote|Rest assured, this too will somehow be blamed on 4chan.|anon, being [[smart]]}}

{{quote|ONE SOLUTION: PIPE BOMB|anon, saying what we're all thinking}}

{{quote|So fucking Phyllis gets to keep ALL her magic bot votes, but Zach gets his total cut by 70%???|Apparently so.}}

{{quote|I'm 12 and what is this|Nick Jeers}}

==Is It Over?==
[[Yes|No.]] Technically, it seems like they're going to allow Zach to participate in the finals, despite being [[Raped|dicked]] out of the top five (along with [[losers|two others who finished out of the running]]), for a total of eight contestants from the online contest. However, because OWN has demonstrated such obvious [[Rage|hostility]] towards Zach and his [[basement_dwellers|fans]]

Zach [http://www.oprah.com/own-your-own-show/And-The-Winner-of-Your-OWN-Show-Is actually ended up WINNING] in the finals.  This shit went down like six months ago, but no one was paying attention, because doing so would require [[dying alone|actually fucking watching Oprah]].

==Gallery==
<center><gallery>
Image:Oprahs_lair.jpg|Pretty much how it went down.

Image:Watermelonblackchick.jpg|Dr. Phyllis.

Image:Votedifference.png|minus 6 million
Image:Zach Fox.jpg|Shit just got real.
</gallery></center>

==See Also==
*[[Operations]]
*[[Oprah]]
*[[Holocaust]]
*[[Serious Business]]
*[[Niggers]]
*[[Old Media]]
*[[Internet Hate Machine]]
*[[Camwhores]]
*[[Over_9000]]

==External Links==
*[http://myown.oprah.com/audition/index.html?request=video_details&response_id=5615&promo_id=1 Zach's vote page]
*[http://www.facebook.com/?ref=logo#!/pages/The-Official-Fan-Page-of-Zach-Anner/128660607158820?ref=ts Zach's Facebook Fan Page]
*[http://www.oprah.com/community/community/tows/talkabout Oprah's community forum. SPAM PLOX]
*[http://www.youtube.com/user/ZachAnner Zach's YouTube channel]
*[http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/06/22/oprah-rigs-votes-zach-anner_n_621729.html Huffington Post shitshow]
*[http://www.examiner.com/search.html?cx=partner-pub-7479725245717969%3A9ze01gmnpyp&cof=FORID%3A9&ie=ISO-8859-1&q=zach+anner&sa=Search&siteurl=www.examiner.com%2Fx-30789-San-Antonio-Headlines-Examiner~y2010m7d9-Zach-Anner-with-over-9-million-votes-losses-6-million-votes-on-official-Oprah-talley#1055 Complete Examiner coverage of Zach Anner - Best coverage so far.]
*[http://www.geekosystem.com/?s=Zach+Anner Geekosystem's Zach Anner coverage (take the good with the bad)]
*[http://popwatch.ew.com/2010/06/23/oprah-zach-anner-voting-controversy/ Entertainment Weekly]
*[http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2010/06/24/oprah-winfrey-network-contest-fix-rig-zach-anner/ We report, you decide, motherfuckers]
*[http://news.oneindia.in/2010/06/27/oprahwinfrey-embroiled-in-vote-rigging-scandal.html Even the Indian press wants in on the action]
*[http://videogum.com/194472/oprah-rigging-votes-against-zach-anner/webjunk/ Videogum coverage]
*[http://newsfeed.time.com/2010/06/14/zach-anner-internet-celebrity-and-future-oprah/ Time Magazine]
:(There's literally like 1000 pages of this stuff, so just Google it you lazy bastards)
*[mailto:phyllis.tucker@sdhc.k12.fl.us Dr. Phyllis' e-mail]



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