View source for No life

[[Image:nolife.jpg|thumb|Can't kill them...]]

A [[You|person]] who has NO social life whatsoever. This is about [[statistics|98.9%]] of everyone on the [[internets]].

==Etymology/Explanation==
Without variation, the first accusation or retort of the [[pwned]] is that the [[pwn]]r has '''no life'''.  This is normally phrased as a claim that the [[pwn]]r spends too much [[time]] on the [[Internets]], or that the incidence of [[pwn]]age took "too much time" or "too much effort", clearly indicating that the [[pwn]]r is [[obsessed]] with and quite possibly [[Internet stalking]] the [[pwn]]ee. The [[pwned]] may also attempt to put on a facade that they are [[Too cool for the internet|"too cool for this internet shit anyways."]]

Because this is almost the exclusive standard usage of the phrase, '''no life''' has become a ''de facto'' acknowledgment of [[pwn]]ification. Thus most [[troll]]s will remain unsatisfied until told they have '''no life'''.

==Variations==
* "Get a life"
* "Wow, that must have taken forever. [[fact#Factual Inaccuracy|Clearly]] you have '''no life'''."
* "Wow, you are spending way too much time arguing with me. [[fact#Factual Inaccuracy|Clearly]] you have '''no life'''."
* "You keep commenting because you have '''no life'''."  See [[occupatio]].
* "Why don't you spend more of your time with your kids instead of arguing on the [[Internets]]?"&mdash;a favorite of [[pwned]] [[teen mothers]]
* "Poor, poor dear.  Here, have a nickel and get yourself a life."
* "Yeah right, you don't work, you spend all day online trolling because you have '''no life'''!"
* "Obviously you have '''no life''' and should probably kill yourself in order to not waste any more of the precious, precious natural resources currently keeping that stink sack you call skin alive."
* "Well, pardon [[mexican|me]] for HAVING A LIFE, [[cracker|gringo]]. "

==Comebacks==

* "[[NO U]]"
* "[[BAWWW]]"
* "[[U MAD]]"
* "[[lol]]"
* "[[Rofl]]"
* "[[Your Mom]]"

Any one or more of these will guarantee instant [[drama]] and [[butthurt]] met with "[[G2g i need sleep]]." Best of all, they require [[lazy|minimal typing]].

==List of People Who Have No Life==
[[Image:Sogen Kato.jpg|thumb|This guy also has '''[[pun|no life]]'''.]]
* [[Asspies]]
* [[Basement Dwellers|Commentary Community, the]] [[so-called|(So-called)]]
* [[Cheddar-Cheesia]]
* [[Youtube Poop|Gorilla Judge, the]]
* [[Gsnfag]]s
* [[Kevin and Kat]]
* [[Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto|LoGatto, Anthony ("A-Log")]] and [[Friends of A-Log|all his shut-in little friends]]
* [[Meowbark]]
* [[Sceptre]]
* [[Ser Amantio di Nicolao]]
* [[Solitaire]]
* [[Jimbo Wales|Wales, James Donal]]
* [[You]]
* [[Kaoru Yuuka|Yuuka, Kaoru]]
* [[Zezima]]
* [[Zombies]]

==Fanfiction==
[[Image:South Park Fat Guy.png|thumb|left|The author of this story.]]
My eyes glaze over as I stare at the unnatural florescent glow of the computer monitor. Suddenly, I realize I've had to urinate for 5 hours now. I was so entranced in my game of Warcraft that I never noticed. I stagger off of my chair, which has a hole worn in it from my fat ass grinding against it for almost 3 years straight. I limp into the bathroom and turn on the light. I glance into the mirror and stop. Something caught my interest. I looked into the mirror, at myself, into my eyes - my tired, limp, lazy, dull, lifeless eyes. And in that moment, reality hits me like a stone in the head; I have no life left, for the Internet has sucked it away, into the virtual world, gone among the billions of ones and zeros...I have no life...

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[[Category:How Not To Live]]