View source for Fred

{{spoilers|text=[[Pwnt|FRED HAS HAD HIS ACCOUNT HACKED AND TAKEN THE FUCK DOWN!1!1!!! THANK FUCK FOR THAT!!!!!1]]}}

[[Image:Fred assplug.JPG|thumb|Fred getting it up the ass from one of his tater [[white|haters]].]]
[[Image:Sniapsd215152.JPG|thumb|lolwut]]
[[Image:Fredaudience.jpg|thumb|This is your fault.]]
[[Image:LMAO1.png|thumb|Umad fred?]]
'''Fred Faggothorn''' (aka [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lucas_Cruikshank Lucas Cruikshank] IRL), otherwise known as just '''Fred''', is yet another fucktarded, epic failure on [[YouTube]] that [[cheat|somehow]] became the [[unwarrented self importance|most subscribed]] YouTuber in history(Not anymore, [[O rly|we can all die happy]]), mostly because deformed [[FAIL|spastic fangirls]] find the [[bullshit]] coming from that dry, crusty cunt he calls his mouth funny, or because they think [[Lie|his emo haircut is hawt]]. He appeals to every newfag who thinks lolcats are funny and uses [[AOL]] on their shitty [[Pornography|virus filled]] computers. His videos consist of him using a [[aspergers|high pitched voice]] from [[Windows|cheap computer]] software and acting like a [[shota|6 year old boy]], and usually getting into retarded dilemmas like [[insane|losing his meds]] and running away from his [[ugly|mom]]. His lack of [[lulz]] has ended countless lives. Watching his videos will most likely kill your brain cells due to the [[faggotry|overwhelming sensory overload]] put into them, and are the complete definition of [[unfunny]]. {{quote|Hi Lucas I LOVE you and u can call me any time for real ANYTIME!!!!! 512-945-9510}}
{{quote|Fred is the coolest person on Youtube. Hes got millions of fans and haters, the people who hate him do that just cuz hes hella famous and hes the most successful person on Youtube. I <3 Fred. Me - Oh mah goth dood, lets go watch Fred's new video. Saibin - No man, Fred fawking sucks. Me - * Pulls out a gun shots Saibin on his motherfawking penis. * : DIE FRED HATER, DIE : (this person's username is actually balldropfail. [[srs]].)}}
{{quote|I want to fucking slam his head on the edge of a sidewalk, kick his head over and over while it's on the edge, run over his neck with a motorcycle, and hit him in the teeth with a baseball bat!}}
{{quote|How is he considered funny? Spongebob is funnier than that peice of shit.}}
{{quote|I'd rather rip my dick off and shove it up my ass then listen to this faggot one more second}}
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<youtube>Hi7TM87ksDI</youtube>
[[Jawsus|BRUSHING MAH TEEF TICKLES LOL!!!1!!1]]

== The story ==		 
[[Image:Gaykissing.jpg|thumb|right|Fred fighting with Kevin]]	
In his series of moronic videos Fred has queefed out, he pretends to be a shota in acting that actually can give non-retarded people so much [[rage]] at how bad he is they will have a heart attack. he also pretends to be a [[emo | social outcast]] with [[ADHD]] in attempt to appeal to the millions of [[fucktard | fucktarded]] [[13 year old boys]] and girls looking for friends on the Internet because they're too fucking retarded to get any in real friends in life . Fred also pretends to have an abusive alcoholic [[transvestite]] mother, who [[Anal rape | anally penetrates]] him on a daily basis, finally explaining why he is such a ridiculously huge faggot. Fred is a huge faggot.

He lives in Columbus, Nebraska guyz! Lakeview High School. Lucas Cruikshank.

[[DO IT FAGGOT | Kill him.]]

==[[Doug]] [[Parkinsons|Derky]]==
After [[Last Thursday|many years]] of verbally raping our eardums into a state of shock, [[Fag|Fred]] has finally retired from the Nickelodean straight-to-DVD business and found a [[Goatse|nice deep hole]] to go and die of cum poisoning.  Just as the intertubes faggotry meter began to return to a stable level and the boys of the [[IDF|Internets Defence Force]] thought they were going home to see their families again, tragedy struck when the dark lord Cruikshank uploaded yet another [[Herpes|video]] to his Tubeyube paeg.  What seemed to be a typical return from the netherworld of faggotry by the e-devil himself soon turned out to be many times worse than one could imagine, a new character by the name of [[Wut|Doug Derky.]]  This horrid new character sported the cursed [[Justin Bieber|fringe of beaver,]] and a voice unnaltered by computer witchcraft and Audacity.  All of the [[Nobody|billions]] of viewers on Youtube were incinerated by the true voice of the beast, even in the distant land of [[Deviantart]] the nefarious sounds caused several colons to explode and a [[Lulz|Furry to be trampled to death]] in mass panic.

<youtube>mvicbRMiZlk</youtube>

We are in dark times [[Gentlemen|men]] and [[Shemale|women]] of ED, gird your [[Cock|loins]] because this new evil will almost certainly be the end of the tubes and all the is lulz as we know it.

*[http://www.facebook.com/DougDerky Derky's Failbook]
*[http://www.twitter.com/dougderky and his Twatter WARNING: may cause faggotry and vaginal centipedes]

== Presidential Campaign ==
[[Image:Youtube fred comments lulz.JPG|thumb|Typical comments on Fred's YouTube channel]]
[[Image:Fredfanssuck.png|thumb|More comments including a piece of [[jailbait]] shit it would seem]]
In early October, Fred announced his fake campaign for [[Obama|President of the United States]], so once again another episode of Fred's failure is butthurtzzz.  The sad part of all this is he's probably the most competent for the job.
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<youtube>ypO4MLGFxYY</youtube>

===How do i failed ejaculationz?===
After a month of terribly-made fake campaign commercials in an attempt to try to make someone somewhere laugh, he made an episode where he acted [[butthurt]] about losing to a [[girl]], quite possibly the most unfunny pointless series of episodes on [[YouTube]] ever.
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<youtube>Qa-OHJ5h75A</youtube>

== Fred is GAY IRL ==

As this soon-to-be-copyright-claimed JewTube proves, Fred [[IRL]] is gay.
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<youtube>LsAKbjMvbU8</youtube>
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You should know that CNN sped up the comment scrolling up. If you pause it at 1:37, one comment states the truth: "You Suck". This comes as no shock to 80% of humanity. However, given that the typical Fred fan is a 12-year-old girl or a 12-year-old fag, such revelations may come as a shock. Then again girls love fags, [[amirite]]? It has been suggested Fred knew that his normal, faggy voice would make all dicks and nips automatically soft, so he sped it up so no one would know WTF is going on. Also, no one likes fags.

Fred gets called out on his faggotry by Danny aka [[Tourette's Guy]].
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<youtube>kQJGwgjZ71c</youtube>
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Still waiting for a live-action version
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<youtube>YIh5DG4fFQc</youtube>
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Fred's encounter with hillbillies during a kayaking trip leaves a bad taste in his mouth.
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<youtube>Ygdm7-dqhlE</youtube>
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== Comments ==
[[Image:comments4.jpg|thumb|Typical comments on any of Fred's videos]]
Fred has many views on all of his videos; some people say that this in itself is proof that he at least has some talent, but they couldn't be more wrong as can be seen in the picture of his comments. Over 9000% of comments are haters, [[∞|∞%]] are spammers, and 4% are fans. Fred's supposed popularity is completely derived from people hating him so much that they go to every video he has on his channel and post comments about how he is [[truth | an untalented little piece of shit who should become an hero]].

Fred somehow managed to anally rape Captain Awesome after fucking [[fakesagan]]'s gf.

==Fanbase==
[[Image:Fred emofag.jpg|thumb|Omigod so hawt]]

{{quote|guys cant you leave him alone?! he doesn't actually sound like that! Actually he's not a noob hes actually helping his cousine who has cancer :( SO [[Chris Crocker|LEAVE HIM ALONE]]|
aabuzalaf}} 



Like every internet celebrity, Fred has plenty of [[fangirls]] wanting to suck his .005-micrometer [[dick]]. His fans are all jackasses who, like any good [[fangirl]], listen to the [[Jonas Brothers]] and [[Justin Bieber]], still watch Disney Channel regardless of how shitty it is, constantly plaster their [[MySpace]] pages with pointless crap, and find ghey porn appealing everywhere. He also has been documented to have the worst [[Joker]] impression out of anyone, ever.

== YouTube Fred Prank ==	
Last Thursday a couple of kids with too much time on their hands tried gathering /b/ from every corner of the internet globe to have everyone unsubscribe to Fred, which they thought would cause much butt hurt. /b/ didn't respond and decided that the fucktards didn't think this one out. Why would you subscribe to him just to unsubscribe to him in an unfunny prank. All and all Fred lost about four hundred subscribers at most. It was an epic fail which accomplished shit. 

<youtube>W8ckLGW1RC0</youtube>
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Squeeky voice kid gets it right. Talk about one step forward and two steps back.

==Fred and iCarly==
On February 16 of 2009, [[Nickelodeon]] released a special Episode of [[iCarly]]. When you thought the show was already a big hunk of [[bullshit]], they feature Fred. [[Lie|(Because we ALL know that we can't get enough of the helium breathing faggot.)]] Apparently, the episode goes like this: Fred is the most popular guy on the [[internet]], Freddy from [[iCarly]] says that Fred's videos are [[retarded]](so god damn true), Fred acts [[butthurt]] and tells everyone that he won't make videos anymore(TFG), Fred's fans act [[butthurt]] and jump Freddy every 2 minutes, the [[iCarly]] team tries to find Fred and apologize, they find out that it was a plan to get more pageviews for his site.

==Fred Disables His Channel Comments==

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<youtube>-sBkMyHVIpw</youtube>

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==Holy Shit They Gave This Twat a [http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1595842/ Movie]?!1==

[[Image:Drop Dead Fred.jpg|thumb|If only he would.]]

Sometime [[last Thursday]], a rumor was set loose upon the unsuspecting interwebs that casting had begun on a full-length feature movie based around Fred. A very lonely Jew director who lived in his mother's basement saw Fred whilst searching for porn and saw it as his chance to cash in. The movie was produced by Derf Films, which is a completely [[bullshit]] company that Lucas probably made himself. And as if it couldn't be filled with enough [[fail]] and [[faggotry]], they casted -- wait, "casted"?  Did a retarded six-year-old write this? -- [[John Cena]] as Fred's dad. [[Srsly]]. The filming began in November. <s>If you have any respect for the internet at all, you will go to the set and [[an hero]] yourself to hopefully throw a wrench in the works.</s> Disregard that, it premiered on the 15th on Nick.

Surprisingly(?), everyone hated it. Even most of the retarded Fred fans. As it currently stands, the Fred movie has a score of 2.1/10 on [[imdb]].

{{fv|starvids|background-color: pink;|font-weight: bold;|<youtube>rVFJzN20jhQ</youtube>|}}

==His new album==

If his own movie wasn't enough Fred also tried to sell out and get a record deal and his first album (Not counting his stupid Christmas spinoff) called [[no|Who's ready to party?: Fred Figglehorn]].

<youtube>l27otMzmWCQ</youtube>

==Fred Retired==

<s>Well it looks like Fred said he is doing no more videos now after the movie would air on Nickelodeon. Don't let this fool you, just wait a month he will make more videos.</s> [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ylrz20YkgFA DISREGARD]

==See also==
*Jew
*[[Unfunny]]
*[[Faggot]]
*[[Magibon]]
*[[Fangirl]]
*[[YouTube]]
*[[Emo]]
*[[Internet Celebrity]]
*[[Shane Dawson]]
*[[Basement Dweller]]
==Links==

*[http://partyvan.info/wiki/Fred Dox and Raid Stuff]

*{{Ytlink2|Fred}} <s>Lol not anymore</s> shitheads reinstated it.

*{{youtube|cME3nk4StnA|<s>Fred rideing a bike</s> '''Failing at it'''}}

*{{youtube|6Zc7Wt4WBEE|The fag trying to be cool}}
*[http://www.youtube.com/user/Fucketyfuckerable very gay butthurt fan] 
*[http://www.youtube.com/user/kljhhi an even more annoying butthurt fan] 
*[http://www.facebook.com/pages/Fred-Figglehorn/27598034671 OMIGOD FACEBOOK #1 FANSITE!!!1]

*[http://fredfigglehorn.com/ His shitty website]
*[http://news.tubefilter.tv/2009/09/17/youtubes-fred-the-movie/ It has been confirmed. You may now weep.]
*[http://www.miniclip.com/games/fred-figglehorn/en/ His new shitty game - proving he's a retard faggot baby]


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