View source for Bashar al-Assad

{{Perfect Rainbowtiny|CANT MOSSAD THE ASSAD}}
{{Spoilers|REBELS HAD REACHED INTO DAMASCUS AND ASSAD IS ON THE RUN}}
{{Achtung|IT'S OVER}}
[[File:Bashar al-Assad in Russia (2015-10-21) 08.jpg|thumb|right|250px|Al Bundy?]]

'''Bashar Hafez al-Assad'''  or in English '''Basher Del Asshat''' was born on the [[Muslim|Moslem Holiday]] of [[9/11]] on September 11, 1965. Bashar was the [[President|Rightful leader]] of [[Syria]] who was elected in a free, democratic Syrian election on 17 July 2000.  He was able to win the office of Syrian President-for-life in a landslide victory with 88% of the vote. A Puppet leader of the Ba'ath Party and ardent supporter of Islamic Terrorist Groups, Al-Assad screamed the loudest for the destruction of '''[[America|THE GREAT SATAN]]'''. This was until 2012 when he started crying for fellow [[terrorist|Muslim]] U.S. President Barack [[Obama]] to help him maintain his aristocratic lifestyle of elected king and his favored position as King Of Oppression, [[lulz|Violator of Human Rights]], Keeping [[Wimmins]] Barefoot And In The Kitchen and being that Pimp Daddy King that Bitch Smacks anyone that has an opposing political opinion with a long prison sentence.  Everything the [[Obama]] administration stood for.<br>

In December 8, 2024, after nearly 14 years of buttfuckery of civil war, he was [[BTFO]]'ed by rebels.

== The Begining Of His Political Career: Bashar Murders His Brother ==

[[File:Basil al-Assad.jpg|thumb|right|250px|With pics, the motive for murder becomes obvious.  Basel or Bashar the No-chinned dork?]]

Unable to live up to his older brother who, like all the world's royalty such as Prince Charles of England, was a decorated hero in the Syrian Military without having ever fired a weapon or been in a battle - Bashar understood that he could never live up to his father's and the people of Syria's favor of his older, better, and groomed for President/Dictator brother. 
Feeling that he was the one better suited to grinding the people of Syria under his heel and into a never ending circle of eternal servitude and poverty. Not being able to stand the sight of blood and Syrian soldiers giving him the nickname of '''Frank Burns''' for his buther like Army Surgeon skills and 100% mortality rate Bashar realised he wasn't cut out to be a Doctor.  It was, perhaps being told again and again, ''"You Suck"'' by his contemporary doctors that Bashar felt it was time for a change of occupation and decided on the course of action of assassinating his brother.<br>
On 21 January 1994, Bashar [[lie|feigned]] an emergency that had his Brother speeding in the fog, in the early morning hours to Damascus International Airport for a flight to Germany on the Syrian Presidential Jet.  As per his plan, Bashar had convinced his brother Basel to drive because after the assassin's car had [[dead|struck Basel's]] car on the driver's side and at a rather high speed as well, Basel's chauffeur was found alive in the back seat of the car, wearing his seatbelt, while the driver's side seat belts had been removed along with the driver's side airbag .<br>
Like all [[Leftard|Liberal]] [[politics|Politicians]] to come before him, Bashar cried the hardest over his brother's death and ordered that the entire Country of Syria be shut down and for 3 days as the country mourned Basel's death.<br>
Following Basel's death a [[meme|popular slogan]] was started: '''Basel, the man we wanted: Bashar, the leftovers no one wants.'''

== Obama Hooks His Moslem Niggas Up ==

[[File:MAD-Magazine-Obama-Assad-Tale-of-Tape.jpg|thumb|right|250px]]

Being a fellow [[Terrorist|Moslem]] and friend to all rag-heads, terrorists, [[vagina]] mutilators and [[Islam|Islamic]] fundamentalism, [[Obama]] conviently looked the other way to Syrian war crimes and all other violations of human rights.<br>
For all Obama and [[Clinton|Hillary's]] complaints about our [[Trump|great lord and god emperor]] receiving aid from the [[Russia|Russians]], Obama did his best to aid them and Iran through his inaction and indifferance when it came to Syria.  Obama's refusal to interfear did nothing but discredit [[Syria]] as a state and allowed for Islamic extremists like [[ISIS]] to become established and gain power.  More so, Obama's indifferent refusal to enforce threats he had previously made regarding Syrian war crimes led to an escalation in human rights violations such as the [[hoax|alledged]] use of illegal chemical attacks against civilians both, Obama's inaction and ISIS gaining influence, of which started the overflow of Syrian refugees into Europe and [[America]] that Obama used as a ruse to hide his lack of involvement in Syria  by calling [[Trump|President Trump]] xenophobic and racist when he spoke the people's concerns and told these refugees that nobody wanted them stinking up their neighborhoods, bringing terrorism to U.S. shores  and they should all go back home because we already have enough convience store employees and McDonalds drive-thru cashiers that  are incapable of speaking understandable English through an outdoor speaker.<br>
Despite all these failings with his policies regarding Syria, Obama has gone on record saying that he is ''"very proud"''  of the outcome in Syria which includes the deaths of over 3,000 civilians because he refused to honor his own ''"Ultimatiums"'' regarding chemical weapons and allowed Assad to escape responsability.<br>
As experts in Middle East politics put it so eloquently, ''Obama's legacy will forever be remembered for destabilizing, in a matter of weeks, what the free world has spent the last 75 years working their asses off to stabilize.''<br>

== Assad Kneels Before Trump ==
<br>
<center>
{{frame|<gallery  class="middle"; heights="400px" widths="230px">
File:Executive Order 13769.pdf.jpg|Executive order 13769
</gallery>|border=black|background=white}}
</center>
<br>

Backing Executive Order 13769, or popularly known by [[Leftards]] as the Moslem ban, which mandates refugees from Syria be indefinately suspended from being allowed to resettle in the [[United States]] on a permanent or temporary basis, Assad supported the measure by going on record saying, ''"The executive order is written to be against terrorists that want to infiltrate and wage war against the West.  It is [[Trump|the great god emperor of the West's]] intention to protect his people and to keep these people from coming into his country to do harm to his people.  As a leader, I respect these measures.  I don't see this order as being against the Syrian People or Moslems in general but as looking to protect them because if terrorist were to come in under the guise as being refugees and did great harm to the West like they did on [[9/11]], they would only further harm Western/Islamic relations that have been already damaged to a near, unrepairable extent by terrorists"''<br>

== Syria And Russian Relations ==

<center><youtube>XPstRM77wMI</youtube></center>

{{Quote|If you look really hard, you can guess the exact second Assad started sucking Putin's dick}}

[[File:Putin-assad.jpg|thumb|right|250px|it's the Bond villain on the right and not the dork on the left that you should fear]]

Syria is the first time Russia has involved itself in a direct military conflict outside its sphere of influence since the biggest Idiot and worst of all US Presidents, [[Ronald Reagan]], hit them with an all [[American]] bitchslap so uneducated Americans believe that Ronny Reagans aggressive foreign policy was the reason of the Collapse of USSR but actually the end of Cold War in [[1980s|1989]] was an implosion of Soviet System that was induced by immanet deficites.<br>
Historically, Russia has always aided the more belligerent Middle Eastern Countries like Syria during the Cold War years for oil and as a tool to influence the region by serving as a constant threat to the American Ally and great Middle Eastern Nation of [[Israel]] with economic and military assistance.<br>
It was the Syrian Revolution of 1966 that cemented ties between Syria and Russia when Hafez al-Assad gave up his ass, along with Naval Ports and bases - giving Russia its much desired position in Middle Eastern Politics, that he was able to kill everyone in opposition to him and become President For Life of Syria in 1970.<br>
Since 2011, most of what Russia's involvement in Syria amounted to maintaining a government that the people of Syria no longer wanted. Since October 2011, Russia had permanently used its position on the UN Security Council to veto all possible U.N. Sanctions against Syria designed either to demand the Resignation of Basher Del-Asshat or to bring him up on war crimes.<br>
Since 2015, Putin's influence in Syria had grown with him renewing the past ''"Syria is Russia's bottom bitch relationship"'' that began with Asshat's father when Putin once again committed military weapons and troops to resist the deposing of Assad that the Syrian people wanted.<br>
Not wanting to anger his [[Muslim|Moslem]] masters that want to depose Assad or his Russian pals, [[Obama]] famously did what he always does and did nothing, checking off Syria as a win in his box while blaming the former policies of [[W|George W Bush]] for all the recent discord in the region.<br>

=== Reasons For Russian Involvment ===

[[File:20030100nb it is all about oil front.jpg|thumb|right|250px]]

Main reason: Oil you dumb ass piece of shit or have you become so brainwashed by the [[Leftard|Liberal Medias]] of the United States, Great Britain and [[Canada|The Socialist Republic Of Canada]] that [[You]] believe that it's only America that goes out and waging wars in regions because it requires a constant flow of oil to turn into gasoline so it can feed its forever in conflict war machine?<br>
First off: That was a good thing because it was the years between 1945 and the [[1980s]] that the US broke Russia's back and they had to withdraw from the world stage. It was only  because draft dodging [[Leftards|libtards]] like [[Bill Clinton]] and covert communist agents like [[Hillary Clinton]] and [[Obama]] claiming that the world was now safe because there were no longer two world powers standing toe to toe against each other in perpetual stalemate. By demanding reductions in the US military and pushing policies that reduced US world involvment they gave Russia the time it needed to regroup and reposition itself back on the world stage.<br>
Another reason for Russian involvment in Syria revolves around the fact that Russia has no Naval Bases on the Mediterranean except for Tartus in Syria. If Assad were to be deposed and a new government instaled in Syria then Russia would have to renegotiate its position and would probably take an [[anal|ass fucking]] to maintain it's only naval base in the Mediterranean or lose its presence on the sea entirely.<br>
Finally: Weapons sales. The magazine '''Foreign Affairs''' states that the Assad led government is one of the biggest buyers of Russian made weapons. Like any good capitalist investor, [[ironic]], Russia wants to protect its best customer and secure future sales interests.<br>

== Putin On The Ritz: Syrian Style ==

[[File:1050076334.jpg|thumb|right|250px|The epitomy of Bond villains]]

The big question being asked right now is, ''"Why did Putin committ Russian troops and weapons to Syria when these resources could be better spent elsewhere?"''  To quote George Mallory after he scaled Mt. Everest, ''"Because it was there,"'' or better yet, ''"Because he could."''<br>
Military experts are claiming that Syria was a Russian demonstration of might and served to announce its return to the world stage as a military power.  By showing its ability to invest money and military tools of war such as fighter jets, soldiers and missiles  along with the ability to maintain these for a long period of time was designed to show the world that Russia has the economy and military capabilities to deploy a proper military strike effectively.  Furthermore, it served as a show of force to the US, reminding the US  that thanks to [[liberal]] generosities that they are no longer the decaying, former world power from the 90s, but are on the verge of retaking their place as a world power and can intrude on any side of any American led military operation if they so choose.<br>
Now, go to sleep with the same worries that your parents and grandparents had knowing that the world is one bad hangover and an accidental button push from [[WWIII|World War 3]] and hope that the world will be there when you wake up.  Goodnight and remember that if you're not at '''Ground Zero''' when the bomb hits and instantly vaporized you will die a slow and agonizing death from Radiation Sickness.<br>


== A List Of Basher del-Asshat's Human Rights Violations Or How To Troll Syrian Fanboys ==

[[File:35hiiyf.jpg|thumb|right|250px|An actual birthday cake for a Gamefaqs, Syrian Fanboy]]
[[File:Assad,sozforpartyrocking.jpg|thumb|right|250px|He really is sorry.]]

The internet is not the safe space a lot of Assad's fan boys try to claim it to be and argue that if Assad was the dictator that the world claims him to be, then why would he allow the transmission of information across the internet.<br>
The fact is, much of the internet in Syria had been heavily censored with sites like Arabic Wikipedia, Facebook, Google and Twitter being blocked along with a 2007 law that requires all internet cafes to record a persons comments on message boards and chat forums.<br>
The biggest problem with the Assad goverment was that it was like the deposed Hussein government in that the secret police and military are literally a part of the government in that no one knows which is which and to oppose the military or police is to oppose the government and a threat against the Syrian Government is a direct threat against the military and police.<br>
Much like Castro's Cuba, this intertwined design is done with the sole purpose of qwelling revolution before it starts because to depose the existing government you must also destroy the police and military making a coup almost impossible without the direct Involvment of a foreign power.<br>
Despite his country being broke and in the middle of a civil war.  People starving, 51% of the Syrian Population unemployed and black markets dominating the economy, Assad, in 2014,  opened a 50 Million dollar mall in the center of the city of Tartus to the disappointment of his people who saw this as a ploy to cemment loyalties through bribes and favoritism.<br>

{{Quote|<b>There are reasonable grounds to believe that high-ranking officers—including the heads of branches and directorates—commanding these detention facilities, those in charge of the military police, as well as their civilian superiors, knew of the vast number of deaths occurring in detention facilities ... yet did not take action to prevent abuse, investigate allegations or prosecute those responsible</b>|UN Commision Of Inquiry Regarding Syria on the mass scale of deaths of detainees which may constitute a possible war crime}}
<br>

{{Quote|<b>Syrian Government aircraft carried out several apparently deliberate attacks on hospitals, medical centres and clinics and aid convoys, killing and injuring civilians, including medical workers.</b>|Amnesty International Regarding Syria}}<br>

{{Quote|<b>Two barrel bombs allegedly containing chlorine gas were dropped by suspected Syrian Government aircraft on 1 August on two residential neighbourhoods controlled by non-state armed groups in Saraqeb city, Idleb province, reportedly injuring at least 28 civilians.</b>|Amnesty International spreading fake news about the Syrian Government}}<br>

{{Quote|<b>Torture and other ill-treatment of detainees by Syrian government security and intelligence agencies and in state prisons remained systematic and widespread. Torture and other ill-treatment continued to result in a high incidence of detainee deaths, adding to the thousands of deaths in custody.<br>
In August the Human Rights Data Analysis Group, an NGO that uses scientific approaches to analyze human rights violations, estimated that there were at least 17,723 deaths in government custody between March 2011 and December 2015, resulting from torture and other ill-treatment.</b>|Amnesty International regarding Syria}}<br>

== See Also ==

*[[America]]
*[[Clinton]]
*[[Communism]]
*[[ISIS]]
*[[Islam]]
*[[Muslim|Moslem]]
*[[Obama]]
*[[Oil]]
*[[Rapefugee]]
*[[Russia]]
*[[Syria]]
*[[Sand niggers]]
*[[Socialism]]
*[[Terrorism]]
*[[Terrorist]]
*[[Trump]]
*[[Vladimir Putin]]


{{Commonwealth}}
{{Islam}}
{{Politics}}
{{Truth}}


[[Category:People]]
[[Category:America]]
[[Category:Communicae]]
[[Category:IRL Shit]]
[[Category:Rusfags]]
[[Category:Terrorists]]