View source for Stinkrat

[[Image:Stinkrat attack.JPG|thumb|REAL MEN HATE WEASELS]]
[[File:Vitruvian Ferret.jpg|thumb|"Know thy self, know thy enemy. A thousand battles, a thousand victories." - ''[[Gook|Sun Tzu]]'']]

'''Stinkrats''',  also called "weasels", or "ferrets", are the gayest possible pets that anyone could own. They combine the [[lies|lameness of a cat]] and the outright flaming [[fag|faggyness]] of a one of those yappy toy dogs that Hollywood whores keep in their [[Vagina|purses]], '''AND''' it reeks of shit and axle grease to boot. Given how crappy a ferret is, it takes a special kind of [[Fucktard|eccentrist]] to even consider owning one of these worthless little pieces of shit. According to [[Wikipedia]], [[Roman|Caesar Augustus]] sent ferrets or mongooses (named "viverrae" by Plinius) to the [[ibiza|Balearic Islands]] to control the [[cat|rabbit]] plagues in 6 BC.

==Why Stinkrats Suck==

They fucking smell like ass and embalming fluid, hence their common name. Many stinkrat owners remark how cuddly these overgrown rodents are, but [[Jesus Christ]] almighty, who the fuck wants to get anywhere near one? 

It's closest relative is the common sewer rat, and they seem to know that they are inherently fail, as they like to keel over if you sneeze on them or look at them cross-eyed. Howevar, others think their inferior genetic makeup is not completely to blame. [[Some argue|Some zoologist speculate]] that ferrets simply don't live long because they would rather [[An hero|just die]] than be the pet of such an abysmal human being.

Whatever the reason, ferrets typically have a short lifespan, have chronically poor health, and require all kinds of [[fake]] medicines, and special ferret food just to keep them alive (which is basically the dog and cat food that fell on the floor at the factory, only it costs as much as a tank of gas [[Awesome|Every. Fucking. Week.]]

==Holy Shit, Ferret Owners are Completely Batshit Insane==
Stinkrat owners, as you would expect, are completely certifiable mental case fucktards. Think about how stupid you would have to be to want one of these, and combine that with someone who has an [[Gay|intense craving for the p3nor]], typically makes [[Scientology|poor choices in life]], and has the tendency to not [[STFU|SHUT THE FUCK UP]] long after you've flamed them into oblivion. Got all of that? It's much. much, worse:
<center>{{videoframe|E-Mpathycentral|font-weight:bold; text-align:center|font-weight: bold;
|<youtube>djelJi_IqW8</youtube><center> Some Ferrets jumping around into a bowl full of peanuts. Funny!</center>
|<youtube>pRfwNjw82GY</youtube><center> Ferrets: The Pursuit of Excellence</center> 
|<youtube>SAhYJI9rmXc</youtube><center> Ferrets: The Pursuit of Excellence</center>
}}</center>

{{quote|It seems like as my children got older and moved out, I sort of replaced them with ferrets.|And she wonders [[Batshit insane|why her children don't call her.]]}}

==Trolling Ferret Owners==
<center><youtube>Ca2Wbxf4Lu0</youtube></center>

[[Image:RAGE.jpg|thumb|[[RAGE|<font color="green">>Fuck you my ferret is better than you.</font>]]]]
Trolling these stupid faggots is really easy, as they are, again, clearly diminished in mental capacity. They will [[tl;dr|go on endlessly]] about how great these little shits are, mostly as a facade, to hide the fact that they are secretly ashamed of their failure of a pet. Knowing that is half the battle. Some common ways of trolling these idiots are:
*Saying [[Asspies|pretty much anything remotely negative]].
*[[Caturday|Spamming cats]] in their faggy [[Anti-lulz|Ferret Friday]] threads on /an/ ([[Pokemon|IT'S SUPER EFFECTIVE!]])<br>
*Tell them that a cat or a dog, or even a fucking goldfish, is >9,000 times better than a shitty ferret, any day of the week.
*Also, posting pictures of [[dead]] stinkrats. For some reason these are really easy to come by.

==Ferrets For Kids==

<center>
<youtube>BNZzJELbFRI</youtube>
</center>


==Gallery of Shame==

{{cg|Stinkrats|STINKRATZ|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Stinkrat cheerleader.jpg|There is no God.
Image:Stinkrat hat.jpg|[[Facepalm|/facepalm]]
Image:Stinkrat bdsm.jpg|Some stinkrat owners are into [[Bestiality|BDSM]].
Image:Stinkrat Tuxedo.jpg|PLEASE MAKE IT STOP
File:Schnookums Lurking.gif|Oh, hello!
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Stinkrat Paris Hilton.jpg|That's right, [http://thesuperficial.com/2006/07/paris_hilton_really_loves_her.php Paris Hilton owns a stinkrat]. I think that pretty much says it all. BTW, the life expectancy for this one has just [[VD|diminished significantly]].
Image:Stinkrat Cheezburger.jpg|Oh, like you didn't see [[ICHC|this coming]].
Image:Stinkrat rabbit cosplay.jpg|A [[nice try|pathetic cover up]] by an ashamed stinkrat owner.
Image:Snacksferret.jpg|Another [[Snacks|subtle argument]] against the ferret.
<!>Image:Stinkrat pwnt.jpg|The right thing to do.<!>
<!>Image:Stinkrat fixed.jpg|For the more [[offended|sensitive]] audience.<!>
<!>File:Wiseferretiswise.jpg|Wise ferret is wise<!>
<!>File:FerretWorld.jpg|Ferret [[WTC]]<!>
File:Attack Ferret attack 640.jpg|[[ED]]'s eventual fate thanks to this horrid article about wuvly ferrets
<!>File:Ferretolympics.jpg|Ferret Olympics<!>
<!>File:Furry Ferret Furret by raizy.jpg|Furry Ferret Furret by [[DeviantArt]]ist Raizy<!>
File:FerretBabe.jpg|"Ferret Babe"
File:Stinkcat.jpg|The stinkrat's closest living relative
Image:Furretbeatsferret.jpg|[[pokemon|Furret]] > ferret.
File:Creepy Ferret People.jpg|[[Creepypasta|Ferret People]]
File:Tkgd2007 Weasel words.png
File:Weasel words on my wiki.png|<center>It's more likely<br />than you think...</center>
Image:My Spider.jpg|[[Spider]]s make much better pets than stinkrats.
</gallery>}}

==Pets That Are Way Better than Stinkrats==
*[[Cats]]
*[[Dogs]]
*[[Hamster]]s
*[[Mudkipz]]
*[[Penguin]]s
*[[Extreme animals|Pretty much any other animal you can think of]]

[[Category:Animals]]
[[Category:IRL Shit]]

==External Links==
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VxLP6ni8vVo Rudy Giuliani hates ferrets.]
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eCgL18iKOdE Ahnold drowns stinkrats in bathrooms]

[[Category:Subcultures]] 
[[Category:Abnormal Psych]]