View source for Ren Fest


[[Image:Renfest2.jpg|thumb|right|Renfest [[whore|whores]], though they prefer the term wench, because they're only whores when they can be seventeenth-century whores.]][[Image:Renfest1.jpg|thumb|left|A typical renfest costume. Note the [[homosexuality]].]]'''Ren Fest''' is a shortened term for '''Renaissance Festival''', shortened as thus because nobody on the [[internets]] can remember how to spell [[Renaissance]] properly. It's an event for people who wish that they lived [[at least 100 years ago]]. It is a haven for [[roleplayers]], since this is the only time of year they can get away with dressing like seventeenth-century whores and homosexuals without being accused of being whores and homosexuals.

Many [[fag|Ren Fest enthusiasts]], in addition to dressing in seventeenth-century garb, also buy suits of armor and/or archaic weapons with which they claim proficiency. Some of the more dedicated even make their own armor, though they are universally considered [[luser]]s.  [[User:EternalTanelorn|EternalTanelorn]] makes his own chainmail armor, even though he does not go to renfest. This is because he is too much of a [[basement-dweller]] to even go to Ren Fest. 

The only reason to go to Ren Fest, other than being a [[nerd]], [[geek]], [[luser]], [[basement-dweller]], or [[furry]], is so you can eat over-sized turkey legs (it's actually emu, lol) and watch grown men knock each other off horses with sticks. At Ren Fest you can also buy horibly overpriced things which you'll realize when you get home are completely worthless. There's no way you'll get your $200 back, so you might as well try to find a use for that steel-spiked leather codpiece you bought. Perhaps it could be a [[Free Cupholder|cupholder]].


==Rennies==

Like the ever-terrifying Carnie, Rennies are employees of the Renaissance Festivals that travel around in caravans with the Festival.  They generally smell terrible, do mind-boggliong (literally, lawl) amounts of hallucinogens and try very hard to have random sexual encounters with as many Festival-goers as humanly possible.  The Rennies are technically the largest group of Armed homeless people in America, and therefore not only sad and somewhat humorous, but also terrifying and dangerous.

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