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Wajas

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Wajas is a virtual pet site that allows furry 16-year-old girls (and an alarming amount of grown men & women) to make their fursona into a for-realz internet picture by breeding Pixel dogs. The site is run by Estuko, a kawaii and desu furfag who cleverly misspelled Etsuko.

(Protip: call them "wolves" or "dogs.")

Average wajas user oozing with sparkledog lust
You know it's true.

What people do there

Breeding!

This was so worth $20.

People spend lots of time planning out intricate designs for their Wajas and breed them. In fact, it's SRS BSNS to have a nice Waja (or at least 100) and God help you if you copy someone else's creative design!

Sadly, higher generations (like, the third generation) are absolutely worthless pieces of shit. These cast-offs are sent to newbies as gifts in the hopes that said newbies will be too retarded to understand the slight. Due to the nature of person this site attracts, this tactic is normally successful.

Only sixty dollars before dyes?

Because the admin planned the site out so well, the only sustainable method of making on-site currency is by selling second generation Waja pups. How do you do this? By buying first-generation customs for twenty US dollars or more. The "rare" breeds sell for fifty to eighty dollars. From there you need to buy dyes (the ones that actually make Wajas that sell are worth at least 18 dollars each) to paint the Wajas pretty colors and offer free blowjobs with purchase, otherwise they'll never sell.

Thousands of these "custom wajas" exist, despite the fact they're all the same crappy recolored lineart. A conservative estimate puts the number of customs at 20,000. Even if all of these designs were made in the cheapest way possible, Wajas.com has made over $650,000 in its three years of life (For a breakdown of profits: see here) and this does not even include the items, upgrades, or user services bought through Wajas.

So, in order to win the game, never breed after the third generation, and keep buying those customs. Since no sensible person would pay $30 once for shitty lineart, scientists remain baffled as to why these dumbfucks would pay it over and over again.


The Breeds

  • $20-$30: Normal, Egyptian, Corsie, Fire, Tempest. All these are ugly and worthless with about 50 billion in existence.
  • Customs made from other customs: Plushie, African, Water. Retards constantly BAWW that they don't know how to make these as they don't come from tokens.
  • $50-$60 or more: Earth, Divine and Bane (which apparently makes little girls cry because it's "too scary"). Too expensive--nobody buys them. All are "special releases" sold when Estu has wasted all money on buttsex again and needs more cash to run the site. Protips: Divines are only sold July 3rd and cost more than a hooker.
  • Not sold for cash: Aerial. More worthless than the $20-30 ones as they were given out free when the site exploded. They were later released for in-game money, making them even more numerous while simultaneously destroying the in-game economy a little bit more. People still try selling them for cash. You can also buy an item that will turn your beloved Waja into an Aerial. Oh noes!
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Make Your Fursona!

$80 Fursona art

Remember what we said about blowing $20 on a pixel dog? Well, not only can you waste mommy and daddy's hard earned cash, you can make it look just like your fursona and go roleplay in a clone of Blackblood Alliance and Naruto in the Wajas forums! Don't forget those expensive dyes and poorly-drawn items that cost $20 or more a piece to make your Fursona unique (just like everyone else's)! They are a MUST HAVE.

Oh, but the price of admission is so worth it once you get to play! Only in Wajas forums can you see such great writing as this:

Deadpool pouted as the two wolfs poofed away, and decides to sit in a corner again and go back to playing with his sock puppet.

azibo sneezed again and a piller was rise under deathpool.

It's almost as great as My Immortal!

Get Into Giveaways!

GenRe- a giving thread where nothing happens.

Countless threads exist just to give shit away. These threads usually take the form of "give a waja to the person above you" or "make a wish" threads in which people can "wish" (read: beg) for rare and expensive items.

Most of the "give an item" threads are filled by a bunch of assholes jerking themselves off by passing around cheap items and BAAAWWing about how bad their lives are. Members are often accused of taking more than they give. This results in a bout of drama in which fingers are pointed in every direction and the accused threatens to LEAVE TEH THREAD FOREVERZ.

Buy Shit!

Once you've taken over Wajas by spending lots of daddy's money on faildogs, there's not much else to do but create more faildogs and become agonizingly rich. But wait! You can collect non-customizable pixels, too!

On a site of 130,000 accounts, sometimes the great idea to release a very limited item comes around. Having at least 100 pixels worth $200 or more in your account is the only way to win the game. It's even better if you can buy 15 out of 20 of a single item on the game, and then get frozen. This ruins the game for everyone and means that no one can ever be happy.

Get B& and go BAWW

Even talking about locked threads gets you locked.

Wajas mods love coming up with new unwritten laws. Typically, rules are added on a whim after great butthurt, nobody is told about these new rules, and breaking said rules results in permaban. Eventually the rules are added to the TOS without telling anyone because "they were always there, guys." When people call them on their bullshit, the mods usually bend the rules to make what they said stick.

Sadly, usually these unwritten rules nail old, non-troll members while trolls go under the radar.

Example Rules:

  • Don't talk about the ban-fest! - Talking about the ban-fest results in thread-locking and possible B&
  • Don't talk about ban-fest victims - If they can't be there to "defend themselves" you can't talk about them.
  • Talking about anyone who is on the site and can "defend themselves" is "targeting" and results in B& - The retarded and self-important mods feel that any talking about someone that does not involve massive buttsex for themselves and their wajas is WRONG and EVIL. BAWWW!!

Many players will try to create nostalgic threads to reminisce about banned members like old friends, especially the ones with lots of Money/items. In reality, most users just want to beg for their "totally legitimate" pixel-shit.

Banning Victims

  • Ken - Unknown why he was permab&, as he responds with "lol I'unno" and mods aren't allowed to even pantomime why. Rumors suggest that he was the hacker of Daisy's account. Hearsay backs this up, suggesting that he even did this before, on Aramii. Why else would he sell $30 tokens at $20, a $10 loss, when he uses them regularly himself?
  • Rayven - Banned for sharing a sales account with her friend. Wtf?
  • Iggy/God - Accepted a shady trade of rare items from a user named Kitty, who stole a lot of money several items from Daisy. We would like to know who Kitty really is, so that we might kiss his/her feet in admiration (come on, Ken, stop being a pussy and own up to it).
  • Drythn - After making snarky comments towards Estuko, this person was the first to receive the temp forum banhammer from the lovely lady herself. It's hardly surprising that, less than ten hours later, this particular user found themselves out in the cold with the icy stamp of perma-banned on their account.
  • Musso - Permab& for multiple accounts from about 2 years ago. Wajas is great with catching up on b&'s, amirite? (them and over 9000 others)

Draaaammaaa...

Wajas is a few hundred furries shoved in a box with expensive fake dogs to fight over. How could Drama NOT happen?

Along with the drama, Wajas also has plenty of butt-kissing, usually accompanying every update or bawww-session. After a loud, obnoxious user has the sudden urge to compare the staff to Hitler, he will then promptly rush over to tell the staff how much he loves them in hopes that they won't freeze his ass after being butthurt. This never ending cycle creates plenty of fodder for more draaaammaaa than is necessary.

Some of the more famous drama incidents that users STILL bitch and moan about:

August 2007 - lm27 and the Sinking of the Titanic

Protip: Ask if anyone knows LadyMarie27 in the forums!

In August of 2007, Wajas was taken briefly offline with the promise of a new layout and some simple updates after a day or two. When the site finally returned, it had a disgusting purple layout and all the features were gone except for the forum. Due to CAREFUL SITE PLANNING, a virus by the name of LadyMarie27 - Later dubbed as LM27, had "decimated" the site.

The hunt to fix this so-called virus only ruined the site more. What better way to calm the raging waja users then to let the users have the forums, but not the rest of the site! The longer the downtime lasted, the worse the constant BAWWing got. Old users who had donated hundreds of dollars to the site left in droves. Even IRL money donation was down, so Estu wasn't making any money off her cash cow.

Important game features, such as the ability to breed Wajas, finally returned in December after four months of downtime with the site having more bugs than a hobo's crotch. The bugs still have not been fixed and the site breaks down and goes into a downtime every few months.

2007 - The Attack of the OWF

AKA Satan. The Obsessed Waja Fan was an NPC who bought ugly and worthless wajas. The more undesirable your waja was, the more the OWF would pay for it. People online when the OWF was introduced made billions overnight by buying up all the dirt cheap wajas and selling them to the OWF.

The OWF was eventually taken offline, after countless furries, upset by the profits they lost out on when their wajas were bought and sold to the OWF, presented reasonable arguments about how inhumane it was to sell virtual dogs to an NPC.

As of August 2009 the site has changed the retire function to pay $5,000 WC upon retirement. This is like a mellowed down version of the OWF and makes retiring almost as useless as it was in the first place.

November 2008 - The Great Downtime (Number 452)

Wajas was transferred from the hands of semi-competent coder Rykos to a paid group of "professional" coders. These coders are so well-trained that in moving the site to its new server they break the website. They successfully lost two weeks of data including all user information, items and Wajas that they had to roll back to the last back up Estuko had made. You'd think there would be a daily backup? But nope, trust Estuko to fuck it all up as usual.

Being business savvy, Estuko decides to create a special piece of shitty breed called the Aerial to give out to each person for free as bribery to stay. Some users promptly made OVER 1000 accounts to get as many Aerials as possible, which is why the breed is virtually worthless. She even cut down the time it takes for female wajas to pop out babies - from five days, to two hours! This ploy didn't work, however as many users rushed over to what appeared to be greener pastures on rival sites.

March 27, 2009 - OMG, ads!

Wajas has major scalability issues caused by things like the stupid decision to permanently save all images as .pngs (even retired wajas - aka, the shitty and abandoned - still have images!), and never clearing out any forum posts, mail, or notifications... ever. The reaction of the admin? Fix the things chewing up server space and bandwidth?

Nope... "OMG- we need moar servers! Add Google Ads to make moar money as we blew all the past cash on buttsex! Put a limit on breeding wajas! Beg for the users to actually spend MOAR money on this site!" Hilarity Ensued.

July 22, 2009 - Uglier puppies time!

The same as before...

In what many Wajas players consider to be the good old days, the colors of puppies were the exact average of the colors of the parents. One day, however, Estuko decided that this was too boring and demanded that the coders change it. Suddenly, the color of your puppy could be any hue between the two parents, or even identical to one parent! The Wajas players collectively shat bricks and proceeded to whine all over the forums about how their precious Wajas had been ruined. If your $30 red dog doesn't make the exact tone of puke orange with your $30 yellow dog, it's USELESS and should be shot.

Protip: If you bawww about how "ugly" and "ruined" your pups are by any change to the breeding system, they're guaranteed to sell to the highest kiss-ass offer.

July 23, 2009 - UPDATE - Within a day Estuko had already caved and is trying to back out of her fuck up from the day before. All the kiddies screamed and hollered all night long on how Estuko shouldn't be making edits without their approval and, once again, she proves that they are right. She hopes that after reprogramming the breeding script to fit everyone's needs and desires that they'll be back to wanting to suck her cock. The problem is that she's too stupid to know how to fix it in order to have everyone agree on things again. In the meantime, she handed out free items that are expensive and rare on the site in order to try to prevent a riot.

To this day she hasn't understood the most obvious fix- Change the fail-script back!


October 5, 2009 - Failcoders

The "coders" added a new game, which, surprise surprise, has a very nasty and obvious exploit.

After bringing it to the attention of one of the "coders" they responded as follows:

PREVIOUS MESSAGES (first to last)

Player Were you the sole creator of the dice game as it appears on Wajas? If so, I was just curious if you had written / worked on any other games (PHP based or otherwise) outside of Wajas. :)
Coder Hi Mambo, I represent a team of developers that support Wajas. I came up with the initial idea for the game and my coders created it. We work on many custom projects for many different clients. Why do you ask?

>Lord Lando.

Player You should inform them that they have a serious lack of bug-checking as far as that game goes.
Coder Hi Mombo,

I am sorry to hear that. Would you care to list any of the bugs that you were able to find so that we may address them? thank you.

>Lord Lando.

Player Let this be an exercise for them, and see if they can find and correct the issue. :)

Feel free to PM me if/when you/they resolve it.

Regards.

Coder Mambo,

This is not appreciated that you are not reporting what you were able to find as a bug or a glitch. If we find that you are abusing this glitch or telling others about it, you will be dealt with accordingly in the strictest sense by the moderators. Please do tell us the issue that you found. Thank you.

>Lord Lando.

Player Ouch. No, I'm not abusing it and no I have not told anyone, nor do I plan to.

I made you aware of the existence of an issue that you would otherwise be unaware of. If it was something more technically complex, I would have given you more specifics.

As it is, however, what most in the development field would call a "rookie mistake", I will let it fall to you as the project manager. You should have verified that the game was ready to go live.

Regards.

Coder I am disappointed. We will be reporting you directly to the site owner to deal with this as they see fit for not making us aware of the exact issue with the game.

>Lord Lando.

Player Oh, don't worry. I already messaged the owner herself prior to this "warning".

Please see the terms of service, which state: "It is requested that users report all bugs to Wajas, INC. staff"; requested, not required.

I am disappointed as well. We were made to believe you all at Eternity Web were professionals. I certainly would not want to have you as caretakers on any web projects I would plan.

Regards.

October 7, 2009 - Update

professional coders!

Even after messaging back and forth with the owner, Estuko, and messages to some of the other "coders" the flaw is still there and no one seems to care. The game was updated but the bug was still there. Silence from the admin and from the coders as to why such an easy to spot and abuse flaw is still in the game. Most likely it's because the retards couldn't find the error.

The player that gave the information to both the admin, coders, and a mod was BANNED. Even after sending the money they got from the glitch (100,000,000,000 WC) back to the admin! Ahh, such professionalism in the coders and scruples of the admin should be copied on every site.

About one week later they realized everyone else had also found the exploit, went "oh shit!" then took the dice game down again.


November 2009 - OMG LIMITS?!

The day has finally come. Estuko has decided that enough is enough. So against her better judgement (wut judgement?), she has now decided to instate limits to "keep the site from dying." They include, but are not limited to....

Breeding age limit: Because old grampa wajas shouldn't be able to get jiggy with it. BUT WAIT, those $20 customs you bought with your parents money will be A-OK! And don't worry. Wajas will be installing the equivalent of doggy Viagra to keep your old, saggy wajas in good fucking condition.

Cave sizes: Because 5,000,000 wajas is just too much. Hoarding pixels costs money, peoples. The first step is admitting you have a problem....

Inactive? FUCK YOU: That's right. Inactive users will have their caves "flushed" (because we all know wajas and its players are shitty to begin with) - and if they want to come back? They get to be greeted by a roomy, empty account! Yay!

Use scrollbar to see the full image

And here is what staff are saying about players when they're not looking!

April 2010: Oh Shit son, you're frozen!

Because the staff are so fucking professional and at the top of their game, as of last Thursday they finally got the tools to detect scammers. After they noticed that "holy shit, when you give people free crap they'll abuse it!", they went on a banning spree. This would only fail a little bit if it hadn't TAKEN THEM A WHOLE YEAR to figure this out. Some players bitched on the sparkledogs' rant board, but nobody gave a shit until it moved onto the khimeros board. After that it was a god damn free-for-all with people saying things that would get them b& on Wajas and none of Estuko's cocksuckers to stop them. Things started to get boring, but lulz occurred when the butthurt Wajas mods came in bawwing about how they'd put up with shit for too long. Cue smackdown by the site's own creator, Onyx.

The Mods

If you can't read area titles, this section is Staff ONLY! It's obvious the site is full of drama whores and retards already so we don't need a list of users.

This rule has totally always been there.

Painty - Once a mod, Painty gave out her password over the forums and quit, then BAWWEd about losing everything she's paid for. Both she and her child are retarded. She was the first (and only) mod to date to get iced. Following that event, she disappeared into the murky depths of hell to get a bunch of people to bawww for her in the name of righteousness. They were all retarded, too. Also a zoophile, Painty purchased a mini-stallion "for her son". Uh huh.

Rapture - An Almighty Moderator, once known as Rupture. A major bitch who actually got demodded for bitchiness. People rejoiced, but as soon as the site suffered another downtime, Rapture had sucked Estuko's dick enough to get her power back. Ruptard enjoys making shit up to get people she doesn't like banned. Now demodded again, hopefully this time for fucking good.

SPECIAL MANTION: Celt

Celt on ED

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