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Styla

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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"Styla" (or: pimp-fag, dazzler, wangster, pornstyla) is a species of douchebag primarily known in western Europe. The term "Styla" was originated from the infamous dwelling place of "Apache Styla" community located on Fikirtepe, Istanbul. It describes a very new and pestilent sort of faggotry, even moar ghey than the most fabulous fag:

The lifeform which describes itself as "stylaz" are mostly Turkish mammals or sandniggaz a.k.a. Arabs with male gonads, who wear (at least 4 must apply):

Personified FAIL
  • dark or mirrored aviator sunglasses (they call them "Porno Sunglasses")
  • baby-pink shirts or sweaters
  • huge bling bling earrings
  • shirts or sweaters with strass applications, blatant and obviously fake designer label prints
  • white shoes out of patent leather
  • glaringly bleached jeans or white trousers
  • new trend: bandannas, worn cowboy style (someone tell them that bandannas have got to be brown or yellow and to be worn in the left back pocket!)
  • Playboy-Bunny patches every-fucking-where
  • Trucker caps just laid on their head, to avoid ruining their...
  • ...50% hair/50% gel Hairdo, often with a bleached Mohawk, that makes them look like Goku or Vegeta.
  • Shaved back head with tribal patterns
  • if not originating from southern Europe Arab: a grotesque fake tan. Those are also called "Spraycan Niggers" or "UV fried chicken".

or:

  • stick their trousers into their white socks while wearing nike airmax or lacoste shoes they stole at footlocker
  • listening to crappy R'n'B music or ridiculous german gangster rap on their cellphonespeakers because headphones could stop the airflow through that large open space in between their ears
  • Asian letter tattoos that would all translate into "I love big juicy cock"

Arguably the European answer to the American Scene Guido scene. (Unfortunately, Eurofags got scene, too) All told they look even more ghey than homosexuals while acting like a macho Neanderthal on cocaine.

Styla behavior:

  • Speak Turkish
  • Act like they´re rich despite actually being poor as fuck and living in old welfare houses
  • They brim with unwarranted self-importance and unrealistic expectations
  • They throw a tantrum when you look at them the wrong way ("I'm gonna fuck your mom!")
  • They get butthurt (and aggressive) when a hot female tells them to fuck off
  • They use strange MSN statuses such as ("Siradanim ama ilk siradan" meaning "I'm ordinary, first order")
  • They all try to hook up with eastern european women on various IM programs such as MSN and ICQ, with the help of their poor english? ("I you like good, cam pls")
  • They think R&B is a new kind of gangsta rap
  • They pose in front of or lean on your luxury car if you leave it alone in their ghetto, uploading the pictures to their MySpace or irc-gallery and claim it's theirs
  • They need half of their ridiculuosly low salary to lease a cheap BMW
  • MySpace or other user galleries frequented by them get spammed full of kitschy shooped internet disease pictures, mostly garnished with playboy-bunnies, and designer logos (they will never be able to afford). They are also very fond of MySpace blinkies.
  • In the rare case they got a credit card, they'll rent a car, race it and put the video up on JewTube. Expect nothing better than cellphone-cam-quality.
  • Being in full feather all day long, their taste of girls are mostly wallflowers (using the contrast to look even more fabulous)
  • They totally FAIL at getting the attention of women over 18 yrs, so they are stuck to 16-year-old girls who love their pink shirts and want to become a "Playboy"-bunny. But for the lulz, they FAIL even at being narcissistic.
  • Total retarded style of writing: "GaNgZzZtaZz", "°~bL!NG*bL!nG~°!" - sometimes using the whole world of ascii to make their mental diarrhea look like creative writing.
  • Claim they have a-levels, but don't even know what a genitive is or how to use it.
  • They always reside in filthy "dwelling-shelves" in big cities, referring to them as "their block".

Also very common among stylaz: posing with fake guns, drugs and status symbols. The aim is to fake a high income, success and/or gangsta status to attract females older than 18. Thinking they were men of some account, they're not even familiar with the basics of etiquette.

Making fun of "Stylaz"

You don't even need to troll them. Just got to log into the said communities and tell them in a polite way that they fail at being "stylish" or their Dolce&Gabbana clothes are obvious fakes. That's enough to make them go KABOOM. If you love making fun of them, apply as a bouncer at a decent nightclub - you'll get lots of them free to the door, have fun booting! In addition to kicking them out, you will probably have to eat others' shit since they are rich and bought 10 bottles of Chrys and the manager doesn't let you fuck with them.

Those guys were serious about their video, this is not a hoax.


Another great example by widely known Turkish DJ MC Kabak

Gallery of the asinine

See also:

Links to the asinine