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Space Station 13
Space Station 13 is a lulzy free to play murder simulator with a playerbase of thirteen year old boys, furfaggots, and wizards running on the Rube Goldberg machine of a platform known as Byond. Originally coded in 2004 by an anonymous faggot, it only became playable when the turds from something awful showed up and began to fix the original pile of shit into a playable "game" complete with 16 bit graphics and a flaming 15 frames per second. Soon after 4chan's /tg/ smelled roleplay and flocked to it like flies to a pile of cow shit in july, quickly polishing the turd the goons had shat out and creating a new branch dubbed /tg/code. Furfaggots then sensed that erp was manifesting and for the first time ever, stopped fapping to dogs and began to weave code like niggers in a plantation and produced the Baycode branch in the 30 seconds they had stopped fapping. Unsurprisingly Baycode was filled to the brim with new special snowflake races and other garbage. Around 2009 some weary /v/irgins found out about the game and stole bits of code like a Mexican in a walmart until they had made a branch of their own, /vg/station. Gamemodes are simple usually traitor where a person has to kill/steal something, the antagonist is selected randomly at round start and with luck it could even be you.
Lore
In 2055, a state of the art space station is erected in orbit around a gas giant by a monopoly known as Nanotrasen to research plasma. Inside the station are five departments detailed below, each with their own chain of command and assigned jobs. After a while some furry birds known as the vox show up and begin to steal shit and find employment with Nanotrasen who gladly accept free workers. On the other side of the galaxy are the syndicate, who want to steal Nanotrasen's research on plasma. Players are stuck in the middle of this shitfit and are tasked with the most complicated job of all, survive.
Departments
Security - An entire department of internet tough guys intent on stopping enemies of the corporation just like Judge Dredd.
Science - The only people who actually research the plasma they were sent to research, filled with trolls and bomb building terrorists.
Engineering - Because of the "state of the art" status of the station, an entire department of the station is dedicated to fixing security's fuck ups and more importantly, releasing a black hole for the lolz.
Cargo - A useless department damned to ordering crates and metal for the rest of the station
Civilian - The department of people still learning the fucked to hell controls
Command - IT'S HIS FAULT
Notable jobs
Clown - All you have to do is honk and fuck with the rest of the crew. By far the best job to troll with, just drop banana peels and rape everyone until you get your brains bashed in by random chance
Security Officer - Become one with stgggs, you are the law of the station. Beat people with your throbbing electric rod of justice for no reason in order to achieve maximum lulz.
Assistant - You have no real job, your sole goal is to cause as much butthurt as humanly possible within the 15 seconds you stay alive.
Scientist - Actually three jobs in one, each with their own chance to cause havoc. Toxins is the study of plasma fueled bombs and how you can make them and how much death you can deal with just one. Xenobiology is the study of slimes, pretty uneventful. Lastly Research and Development is the study of mass produced weapons for people who shouldn't be given weapons.
Trolling
Release plasma in the halls and then light it on fire before you get banned
Subvert the artificial intelligence into killing all humans
Detonate multiple bombs at the same time
Tell people who the antagonist is in ooc chat
Famous People
Cuban Pete - A successful troll who learned how to make a bomb so large it crashed the server. The bug was soon fixed by anally annihilated coders and admins.
Duny - An easy to milk lolcow who hates trolls and anyone who questions his massive ego boner.
Shoe Snatchin' Willy - Another successful troll who stole an entire severs shoes off of their characters.
Links
Where to download the broken engine in hopes you can achieve greatness
Space Station 13 is part of a series on Visit the Gaming Portal for complete coverage. |