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Ralph Breaks The Internet

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film poster
First Rule of the Internet: Don't read the comments...

Ralph Breaks The Internet is Disney's desperate attempt to squeeze out money at the expense of some decent characters from the predecessor Wreck It Ralph by taking a character like Vanelope Von Schweetz that was opposed to the duties of Being a princess and put her on the ever cliched Disney Princess Quest because she, like all Jewess' that have been in a relationship for 4 or more years, she developed boredom and has to go on a spiritual journey to find more in her life while turning Ralph into a Cuck that will do anything and everything to keep his Pedophilic relationship intact with Vanelope.

Unfortunately the whole movie watches like a bad relationship movie, chick flick, from the beginning when Vanelope loses her game cabinet to the end Vanelope getting what she wants with you being the one saying, LOVE MEANS NEVER HAVING TO SAY YOU'RE SORRY


Plot

File:Rbti40987.jpg
Future An Hero

Where the first movie had one very simple plot; (Ralph wanting to be seen as a hero.) - Ralph Breaks The Internet is a compressed medley of stories that start with Ralph breaking Vanelope's game cabinet . Ralph never aplogizes for doing any of this,

While trailing through the internet, Vanelope all of a sudden sprouts a pube and starts having a mid-life crisis where Ralph and her game Sugar Rush don't fulfill her anymore after she spends time in the #1 most famous online video game... GTA! Slaughter Race!!!

While Ralph is willing to and busy trying to earn enough money humiliating himself with embarrassing memes, Vanelope runs off to Disney World drinking mojitos and getting in touch with her princess roots.

In true Disney fashion, Vanelope reflects upon herself in a reflection of water and sees that she wants the world of Slaughter Race over her old worlds because it is exciting and because she doesn'tknow what will happen next.

Overhearing a conversation between Shank and Vanelope betraying him, Ralph goes to the dark web to find a virus to crash Slaughter Race but it escapes when the game is being rebooted and starts duplicating Ralph into a virus that crashes the internet because he is the most insecure thing it could find

After some feel good moments, Ralph cucks out and lets Vanelope go to messages of friendship and love.

Characters

Name Description
Vanelope Von Schweetz The first thing anyone watching this movie should be asking themselves is how the hell can she get out of her game as a glitch? In the first movie she couldn't leave her game because of the glitch rule but in Ralph Breaks the Internet she is everywhere. Like every Jewess that has been married for more than 4 years she is bored with her man and wants to break away from all she knows and this causes her to get Ralph to break her game by designing a new track for her. In the quest across the internets to find a new part to fix her game cabinet, Vanelope decides she wants to be free in a Disney Princess Epiphany by staring into water after which, she leaves all she knows to become a driver for Slaughter Race because she would rather have excitement in her life than the predictability of friendship and homelife. Rates in as the worst girlfriend ever.
Ralph Once a decent character, now a definition in cuckoldry. Basically Venolope's slave Bitch as he will bend over backwards to appease her. Destroys Vanelope's game cabinet by adding a track for her that leads to them entering the internets to find a new steering wheel for the cabinet on ebay. While in the internet, he goes to the Dark web to release a viruse on the internet, hoping that if it were slowed down Vanelope might get bored with it and come home. The insecurity virus he released ends up cloning Ralph's neediness and lonliness which crashes the internet. To cuck him out even more, his life is saved by Disney princesses so that Venelope won't be the cliche Disney Princess that is rescued over and over by a big strong man, instead he is the one being rescued by them. Unlike most Internet poor, he actually makes enough money by copying memes and trending on Social sites without begging for the likes.
Spamley A pop up personified so you know who to Wrap your hands around its neck. Sends Ralph and Venelope to Slaughter Race, to make enough money to pay for their Ebay order, to steal Shanks Car. Later he takes Ralph to the dark web for a virus that ends up breaking the internet.
Shank Owner of the car that Raph and Venelope were sent to steal by Spamley. Leader of an inner city gang of feel good punks that will have you recalling the moebius strip episode of Futurama and have you waiting for Shank to say she was abused by unsaid verbal abuse. Teaches Venolpe that friends can have differant lives and don't need to be in each other's site 24/7. Impresses venelope by being a better driver than her. Played by ✡Gal Gadot✡ and can successfully run a street gang so she's obviously a Jew.
Arthur The Virus that breaks the internet. It hones in on insecurities and copies them over and over. First it copied Venolopies glitch shutting down Slaughter Race. Once it escaped Slaughter Race it started coping Ralph's personal insecurities, Yuck yuck yuck, breaking the internet.
The Disney Princesses How do you convince millions of brain dead girls that a movie is just for them other than having them cucking out the Male character with a rescue? Have them teach Venelope how to be a proper Disney princess while hanging out in street clothes, like Vanelope, back stage. Only there to tell Vanelope the Disney Message of "Follow your heart" and make Vanelope an official Disney princess.

Product Placement

After the meeting, the business executives got into a small closet with the screenwriters and started frotting. This orgy and promised promotions undeniably influenced the direction. Disney's true colors already shine through the executive decision to sequel a movie of theirs. What makes this case special is they flaunt the abundant domains they own. Despite the amount of brands they cram into the movie, it's forever constricted to a PG rating, satisfying no one over the age of 10. Always sticking to the status quo of pleasing 9 year old girls. Typical pedo scheme. Anyway, disregarding Disney's properties, 99% of the IPs serve fuck all except for background noise, zero satirical jabs, and absolutely no corporate rivals. Speaking of which, there is a social media that progresses the plot, BuzzzTube. BuzzzTube is a fictional replica for JewTube. Even though JewTube was displayed in the movie, it cannot serve any plot significance, as it'll mean the jews will get a slice of that budget. Of course Disney would never let that happen, as they deeply hate jews.

LOOK AT ALL THE IPS WE OWN

Virus replicates Ralph's clingy pedophilia

Pedophile clones going after Vanelope to rape her

The movie trying to be like ED

Pandering to the 30 year old women

This cancerous genre of film has been growing like a hungry tumor in the industry. Internet oriented kids films produced by 40 year old dads, under the throbbing cock of Hollywood. Ralph Breaks The Internet takes the cake for worst offender of the shameless innocuous pandering to casual internet users. The scenes displaying the internet are fucking seizure inducing clutter. Littered with heckin relatable icons!

Domains

Much more is scattered throughout the IKEA warehouse.

The Single "Success"

The post credits scene is unironically the most attention garnering, containing the poorly disguised fetish. The furries and their furfaggotry had a new chew toy to chew on, Fun-Bun and Puddles. The scene is as explained; Ralph and Vanelope intrude a mobile game on loli Moana's tablet. Ralph then overfeeds Fun-Bun too many pancakes, therefore he swells up and explodes offscreen. The fame was short lived, like a used fleshlight. This resulted in roughly 30 pieces of fetish porn to be created, and roughly 30,000 homosexuals to circle jerk the fatty scat stuffing porn.

Oscar Awards

This is Disney's first CGI movie sequel, and most ambitious piece of work. Nominated for the Oscar Awards. This is totally gonna win at the Oscars! They've practically plastered the badge of honor on their Blu-ray copies. It's gonna happen- oh-... [Spider-Verse] released and won? Big fucking L. Some argue this being a mistake, when obviously the distributors jumped the gun.

"First rule of the internet: Don't read the comments" - BuzzzTube

Trailer


See Also


Ralph Breaks The Internet is part of a series on

Television

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