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Answerbag

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Answerbag could quite easily be the shittiest (free) social networking site ever conceived. All you do is put up a picture and some information about yourself for your local pedophile terrorist group, considering how most relevant Answerfags are somewhere between the ages of 5 and 12 years old. Then you help out somebody who can't operate a seatbelt. It is also a straight rip-off of Yahoo Answers.

Basic Use

Answerbag allows ordinary people to ask questions before a small internet audience, and guarantees that half of these answers will be serious. You can also answer other people's questions, or your own question. This means people will be confused. A friends system allows you to have a non-sexual relationship with that guy you saw on Megan's Law. You can embed an image or video to questions or answers, which means users have to put up with lame answers and general trolling. There is also a points system on the site, and Answerfags try to receive more useless points and disrespect by building these up. What they don't realize is that only funny answers receive points, and points "magically" disappear when one is not on the site. Eventually, the Answerbag staff ends up stealing your question, preventing you from making useless points off your useless questions.

There are Four types of questions on the site. Normal questions are usually asked by your mom, and posters ask for advice on how to take their brother's dick out of their pussy. Polls are like questions, but you're limited to up to 5 (usually shitty) answers to choose from. Debates spark the most controversy, as they are picked by Answerbag staff, and the staff loves to watch assholes argue on the internet. These debates are always over "moral" subjects, like buttsecks and weed. There are always 2 sides to choose from on a debate: The first is usually "Chill Scientists for World Peace", and the other side is Texan Males for protection of Families". Forums are utter fucking bullshit, just like every other forum out there. If a question about a meme pops up, chances are the meme died years ago. If you answer a question, you will log on later to find a moralfag waiting to war with you, so don't answer any questions/debates (eg. avoid this fucking site).


HOW FOAMY THE SQUIRREL REACTS TO ANSWERBAG

Answerfags

An Answerfag is anyone who asks or searches more than one question on Answerbag. This term adheres to bitches consistently asking for dating advice, man-bitches consistently asking for dating advice, smart-asses who do those politically correct answers, people worried that their cocks are too small (they most likely ARE),Godbags, Over 9000 people asking "IZ TEH WORLD GUNNA END IN 2012?!?!?!?", Atheists asking about Christian Ideology, and Wimmin asking "AM I PRETTY?"; these people usually post their real picture (uh-oh). Eventually, some Answerfags get bored after a while and start to quote movie lines, while people with serious business go on to become the least-liked, highest-ranked members of the site (like a 4chan moderator). Typical famous Answerfags are Moongrim and Sega256. These Answerfags (opposites, by the way) actually care enough about a subject to provide a reason to argue for it. Anon pities them. Wars between Answerfags are usually 10-150 comments long, and always waste someone's time. But hey, that's what the internet is for, right?

Typical Answerfag

Disagreeing with any major Answerfag surely has one of two results, because this person is either a crazed redneck or someone whose only purpose is to disagree with you. Opposing against the crazed redneck will mean a lot of hate mail in your message box, while disagreeing with the other will land you in a 200-comment war over shit nobody cares about.

What hppens if you piss off an Answerfag

If you want a decent explanation of who you're up against, one can be found here: [1]

Facebook

Answerbag lengthened it's horizons in 2009 when it started allowing Facebook users to link their accounts to their Answerbag accounts in an attempt to fund the Iran Missile Program. This resulted in epic lulz, as 0% of Answerbag users realized it's functionality until a year after the feature released, and Answerbag had changed it's format, resulting in more lulz because nobody knew where the fuck anything was. And, of course, the only useless fucking feature of this is to post the question on Facebook. As usual, Facebook users just didn't give a fuck.

Troll it

Luckily, the site allows you to post as Anonymous and is an absolute goldmine of trollable liberals and atheists; although an Answerfag by the name of FruitPunchSamurai is doing a good job of ruining the fun of it. Go troll it until you shit bricks. No matter how blatantly obvious a troll you perform(ed), someone would bite. Every. Single. Time. http://www.answerbag.com/

Death of Answerbag

In December 2015, Answerbag - completely without warning - shut down. All its owners put is this message: "Answerbag.com is no longer available. Thank you for your patronage," leaving dozens of people without a place to feverishly nod in agreement with each other over the same rehashed sociopolitical nonsense and unfunny attempts at humor. Many members, whose lives revolved around Answerbag, now surely wander the Internet aimlessly, looking for a new home to ask dumb things and give dumb answers.

See Also

Answerbag is part of a series on

Sites

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