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Suey Park

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BREAKING NEWS!!
Suey no longer wants to be part of the very movement she created
Scratch that! It took her half a week to backpeddle and befriend Brianna Wu
Why she became upset

Suey Park is a feminist and professional hashtagger whose "accomplishments" include #NotYourAsianSidekick, #CancelColbert and #HowIMetYourRacism. She contributes to society by finding things to be outraged about in an attempt to set herself apart from the other hipsters who are living off of Daddy's trust fund.

   
 
Father into your hands
Why have you forsaken me?
In your eyes forsaken me
In your thoughts forsaken me
In your heart forsaken me, oh

 

 
 

—Suey Park, On why she's such a man hater

#NotYourAsianSidekick

Not being content with being the Asian friend, she created the hashtag NotYourAsianSidekick, to show her outrage, instead of actually talking to her friends about her discomfort like any regular human being.


   
 
it was much easier for me to get in [to college] and that’s the only reason I was there was because I was the only Asian in the cohort, and because of affirmative action
 

 
 

—Suey Park, On why it's racist to be priviledged, somehow.

#CancelColbert

Because Stephen Colbert actually had a funny joke it made this retard uncomfortable, as AZNs don't know about jokes. It is not in their yellow culture. So when viewing the internet with her slanty eyes for things to get outraged about, she stumbled upon a joke made by TheColbertReport, a Twitter that is not run by Stephen Colbert himself, and without hesitation she stopped fingering her sideways Asian pussy and went to blame Stephen for the offensive mildly funny tweet. Of course not realizing that isn't the personal account of Stephen Colbert.


Ching Chong Ding Dong is a character played by Stephen.

Didn't quite work out that way

Instead of Colbert getting canned he was promoted to become the next Late Show host. It is unlikely that he would have gotten this far without the big support of Suey Park and her idiotic fans. So thanks to Suey Park, Colbert is now more popular than ever.
#SueyParkFailed


#HowIMetYourRacism

The shitshow known as How I Met Your Mother featured an episode where all the primary characters were dressed as the stereotypical AZN. This of course made Soy Sauce Park very angry. So angry that she vowed never to watch the show again. It is rumored that the network was so devastated over the news, that they invited all of the crew to lunch.

Other Attempts At Getting Popular

Of course this is not the first time she has tried to earn big. Previously she has tried to sabotage the Superb Owl by claiming that the Washington Redskins was offensive to Shit-in-woods and other native Americans. So since that didn't give her, her much craved attention she of course just tried again. And the smart people of you might notice that the previous entry about Stephen Colbert, was Stephen Colbert actually making fun of the Redskins' manager. Her failed attempts at getting internet famous are:
#NotYourMascot
#NotYourTonto
#NotYourStockMuslim
#POC4culturalenrichment
#ImperialTimeline

Quotes

   
 
I have always been a free spirit, changing my major and my style every chance I could in college. Consistency and practicality are unknown to my very being. My dad died as I was preparing to graduate college and I found myself trying to “grow up” and give up my dreams for a steady career to support my family. It was like my dreams died with my dad as I tried to conform the the [sic] narrow restrictions of academia and administrative work, while continuing to stumble through and cause chaos in my own life and for the institution’s I’ve worked within. This month I did myself a favor and quit both my job and school. I think it would have made my dad happy to know that I was trying to live fully again. This is getting free.
 

 
 

—Suey Park Sauce

   
 
"High-maintenance" is a word patriarchy created in order to shame women for their needs. Reclaiming high-maintenance to mean high standards
 

 
 

—Suey Park sauce

   
 
*starts crying because I cry everyday*
 

 
 

—Suey Park sause

Videos

How it started

Stupid

THE INTERNET RUINED HER LIFE GUIS

Galleries

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

See also

External links

Suey Park is part of a series on

Social Media

Visit the Social Media Portal for complete coverage.

Suey Park is part of a series on

Social Justice

Visit the Social Justice Portal for complete coverage.

Suey Park
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