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YoutubeWakeUp

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YoutubeWakeUP is a slacktivist hashtag/internet "movement" for exposing people just now discovering that there's child porn on the internet. Started in 2018 by white flag citizen Les Rois Des Rats, the movement didn't gain much traction in the states until a user named MattsWhatItIs strategically posted a video of himself watching little girls show camel toe and read comments of Pajeets beating off to 11 year old girls walking around barefoot. Matt and the movement gained notoriety after wannabe "satire" channels like DramaAlert started panicking about an "Adpocolypse 2.0: Electric Boogaloo," failing to stop Disney from not wanting their cartoons to be associated with a bunch of frumpy old men sharing fapbait.

The answer may surprise you
   
 
But think of the poor, poor Youtubers who have to get a job now!
 

 
 

—Pedophiles

Youtube: Broadcast Your Taint!

For about as far back as Youtube's existed, people have been using using it to upload their shitty home videos thinking that they'll be the next FR3D. After all, in the days of Web 1.0, if a screaming retard could make all of the moniez, then surely you and your unfunny friends could be the next viral sensation. In a practice that people still haven't realized is unfunny garbage, people started uploading their home videos of their friends playing out various in-jokes and expecting it to blow up. As an unfortunate consequence of everyone and their grandma trying way too hard to be the next big sensation, kids started to upload their shitty videos of boring crap like morning routines, bath time, or gymnastics stretches, but since kids are stupid, a lot of them didn't bother putting on sports bras beforehand. So, a bunch of creepy old virgins in Russia, India, Europistan, and Florida wasted hours of their collective lives scouring the Newest Uploads section of Youtube just for a millisecond of 240p nipple. In their defense, it's either Youtube or getting a call from the Federal Benis Inspectors for going on teh deep webs (or, you know, not beating off to kids).

It didn't take long for this to be noticed by everyone except Youtube, and remained allowed for years. In 2017, that one faggot with a Foxy avatar Pyrocynical uploaded a video talking about someone of deep concern (we're sure) telling his subreddit that they'll see CP if they search for a specific term on Youtube. Like a true patriot, Pyrocynical did exactly as the internet instructed him to do, and unsurprisingly found some videos of 8 year old girls asking for it. Pyro's video outlining his adventure was taken down, but not before a bunch of tryhard "commentary" channels trying to nitpick the video just so that people wouldn't delete their favorite playlists of six year olds on trampolines, and before some mirrors were put up for it. Pyrocynical released a video after the armchair critics had their rounds with it, calling them out for being pussybitches for disabling comments on their shitty attack videos, and pointed out that the videos were being monetized, which means that tax information had to be sent to Youtube, so some adult was involved within the upload process somewhere. Interestingly enough, most of the videos Pyro referenced in his first upload were removed from the platform, showing that Youtube doesn't watch videos before throwing money at channels.

   
 
Tasty tasty squirt in da ass
 

 
 

—Screencapped pedo, probably going on to write lyrics for Childish Gambino

Tout Le Monde Oublie Les Roi Des Rats

 
Rat posts on 8chan. Neat.
 
Another post Rat saved
 
Youtube pretends to care a year ago.

A year later, French weeaboo Les Roi Des Rats (The King of Rats) published a video of his amateur investigations into some chat groups that existed almost as long as Youtube itself for sharing links to these videos, asking people to hold Youtube's balls to the fire with a hashtag he called YoutubeWakeUP. The video was amazingly well edited, featured a log of original research with sources and links to some SFW examples, and was in French so absolutely nobody who matters watched it. About the same time, Rat King started posting screenshots from one of 8chan's pedo boards sharing Youtube links, but couldn't follow up on this too deeply since a butterfly effect from Daniel "Diddly Dan the Benis Man" Olson's "accidentally" downloading "child porn" and writing about it on his blog would eventually cause the site an overdue purge of the lulzworthy pedo faggots.

archive

The video saw a minor spark in Europe while some websites you've never even heard of shared it, with, sadly, the most notable of them being the French branch of the Huffington Post. We can only assume that Rat King was just as surprised as you are to learn that the Huffingpaint Piss can survive outside of crazy liberal wonderland, but with 800k views on his video, and Youtube themselves replying to him sharing their coverage of it, he took the fame gracefully and thanked everyone involved for helping raise awareness for the issue at hand. Rat King preemptively thought he was finished, and would go on to make videos on grooming rings operating in TikTok and Musical.ly, and participated in a hashtag from French "influencer" Squeezie called #BalanceTonYoutubeur.

So Youtube saw the hashtag, saw the problem, and addressed it before it blew up, right? Nope. Look at your scrollbar, faggot, because we still have half an article to go through, and Youtube and competence go together like water and oily black women. Because the video was subtitled, instead of dubbed, most English-speakers either didn't want to read a ten minute video, or couldn't put it on for background listening, so while the video did impressive as far as French metrics are concerned, barely any English speakers saw it, and meanwhile back over in the states Youtube was too busy finding which Colbert clips to pin to the top of their website to do anything about it.

Back in the states, PaymoneyWubby (think Quinton Reviews but 50 pounds lighter, not an unlikable dipshit, and also nothing like Quinton Reviews) released a video on some 12 year old """"child model"""" doing a horrible excuse of ASMR and JOI, complete with lip smacking and eating, artificial nails rapidly tapping the side of a card, and a bunch of other shit that would make anyone who doesn't beat off to Dora the Explorer gouge their eardrums, and prompt anyone with misophonia to shoot up a school. PaymoneyWubby doesn't quite reach the subscriber threshold where Youtube will let him do whatever the fuck he wants, so they gave him a strike for the NSFW video so that the pedo appeal of Youtube would remain unscathed, and the company wouldn't have another Elsagate under their belt to deal with. A small Streisand Effect played out on Wubby's subreddit, but nothing would come up of it for another month.


Reddit Pretends it Invented the Hashtag

 
Yeah, well, I'm in the whole worm! #EXPOSED!
 
Of course there's a brony
   
 
I'm now in the wormhole
 

 
 

—MattsWhatItIs

Monday, Feb 18, 2019. A little over half a year had passed since the hashtag was born, and not but one day after a glorious prophet proposed an article for this very topic, MattsWhatItIs posted a video on Reddit. In a display of clickbait and social media manipulation the likes of which dinosaur media can only imagine, Matt posted the video close to midnight in the States, so that it would remain relatively unchallenged by faggots uploading five thousand flavor-of-the-month gaming comps, and show up at the top of r/all the very next morning. Matt explored what he called a "Wormhole" created from Youtube's absolutely broken recommended system leading to hours upon hours of fapbait from one video. He mistakenly calls this a "glitch," instead of Youtube's system working as intended by basing recommended videos off of what other people watch after viewing the video a user clicks. Pedophiles no longer needed (per-say) to meet in chat rooms to share videos since Youtube handed them fapbait on a silver platter.

What helped make Matt's video so effective was that instead of sitting there for a half-hour talking about shit nobody cares about, he stopped giving a fuck altogether and logged into a VPN, searched one generic term and clicked a random video with a mythical "woman" on it, then clicked two related videos and suddenly had a recommended section was now full of irl loli presenting themselves, and scrolled down to the pathetic old men trying to talk to the girls and/or post timestamps of nip slips/cameltoe and called them all sick fucks. Matt made an explicit mention that advertisements were being run on this video, and took a page out of GamerGate and spammed the fuck out of his description box for the video with contact information for the companies he was able to screencap, while pointing out that several of the videos had disabled comments (signalling that someone was somewhat aware of the problem), and that users who were sharing links to actual CP in the comments were still active. The last half of the video consisted of him clicking on random recommended videos, some timestamps within them and lingering on their comments, and closed it all off with a montage of Susan Wojcicki talking out of her wrinkly ass about Youtube's "priorities" against some bloggers complaining about mundane shit of theirs being demonetized.

Between this, and the perfect storm which brewed for over two years, the video had reached a million views in a few hours, a feat relatively unheard of for a 20 minute video since most people don't even have the attention span to sit through a 30 second advertisement. Matt held a livestream after its release for everyone to circlejerk about how their virtue signalling would for certain stop the pedophiles this time, like the karma-whores too sensitive for /b/ usually do. Thankfully Matt had provided a mention of the hashtag in his video, finally giving it some real exposure over in the States for Twitter users to start spamming to the confused interns running dog food PR accounts. Some remnants of old media smelled blood in the water and started to "report" on it by doing approximately a tenth of the amount of work put into writing this article (you're welcome). Forbes reported on it. Reddit users started spamming it on Reddit, even though it was already at the top of r/all. PaymoneyWubby got into one of the chats. People spammed it to idubbbz and a bunch of people who probably weren't even awake. Redditfags started spamming the stream with online petitions, as if those ever do anything.

Keemstar doesn't let a good controversy go to waste

 
This screenshot was taken literally five minutes after Keemstar said that Youtube fixed the problem. Those links better stay blue if you don't want a visit from the Party Van.
 
Nudism isn't porn, but a pedo is still going to beat off to a naked child on Youtube. Keemstar sees no problem with this.
 
"No, I'm not the pedo, YOU are!" - A man who asks his preteen fans to strip on cam.
 
"Hey mom, look at my drawing!" "It's shit, Daniel."

Failtroll Attempt

Youtube sent out a knee-jerk reaction to delete any video with "CP" in its title, which did almost nothing since literally none of the demonstrated videos in Matt, Rat, or Pyro's videos were brazen enough to use "CP" in the title, except cause a bunch of Club Penguin and Pokemon Go videos to be deleted, because Youtube thought that a core mechanic of literally the second most popular mobile game in the world would appear in 'less videos than people blatantly titling it "Child Porn." They literally took a 4chan joke from over a DECADE ago, and used it to try to combat child pornography. Jesus Fucking Christ.

Eventually some concern trolls started to weakly attack Matt's video for not blurring out the faces of the girls in the video, as if anyone's going to dox some random four year old in Kazakhstan. With an opening presented by these concern trolls, and a hot new story present for exploitation complete with gullible idiots from Reddit who were looking for validation, Keemstar decided to stick his greasy beard into the chat room and ask to go on DramaAlert, which went about as well as when CNN wanted to do a story on GamerGate, chief difference being that CNN the night before didn't make complete asses out of themselves. Keem went onto a Skype call with Matt, live in front of his audience of 500, and tried to concern troll that smaller channels may or may not get hurt by this, just like in the last Ad-Pocolypse. Nobody was phased by this, since anyone reliant on revenue from a shitty company that thinks John Oliver doing Fortnite dances is hilarious is too stupid to deserve money. The entire chat started slamming Keem for being a sellout, and Keem answered by trying to claim to be an expert on what little girls watch, since he has a daughter (unheard of!), in what is most definitely not a scripted response for explaining why his Youtube search history is full of home videos of toddlers in bath tubs.

   
 
Little girls just need to be little girls
 

 
 

—Keemstar on people grooming children

   
 
What are you going to do, ban public swimming pools because little girls go there?
 

 
 

—Keem "forgets" that most pools ban cameras. Or that they also ban beating off to little girls.

   
 
I have a daughter, so I care
 

 
 

—Keemstar "forgets" child abuse isn't real.

Keemstar went on further to point out that Youtube made a knee-jerk reaction, and asked everyone to think off all of the videos that might have deleted, but between this and his complete inability to even logic, the only people who didn't want him to shut the fuck up were people who wanted to hear him make a further ass of himself.

Kikestar accuses Matt of virtue signalling at. Kikestar calls in at 2:44:00

Anything for a Paycheck

When Keemstar's attempt to provoke Matt completely fell on its face, the slimy pedophile attention whore started arguing against people in the chat like a petty dickhead, then ragequit to start spamming Twitter to his fanboys about how not mad he was, spending hours trying to convince the world in an uphill battle that all along it was Matt who was a pedophile and an attention whore, and conveniently leaving out how badly he got beat the fuck out in the chat. Keem went out, dedicated so desperately to try to "expose" Matt (not unlike when strangers pay him to "expose" his daughter's chest), that he posted three videos of himself screaming about an abandoned Twitter account making Matt a "fraud." Keemstar then activated "slanderous sperg mode" and tries to liken a blatant comedy video with pedophiles grooming children.

(Archived because Keemstar's title changes are as pathetic as his butthurt.)
   
 
I did everything in my power to NOT ask him if he touches kids!
 

 
 

—Keem pinning his own comment, trying to look cool to the 13 year olds he entertains and grooms.

   
 
"[Child exploitation] is an issue that I'm passionate about"
 

 
 

—The guy trying way too hard to slander people for pointing out child exploitation on Youtube.

   
 
I didn't know she was 15!
 

 
 

—Keemstar after being called out for watching a 15 year old spread her butthole for him, three years earlier.

In turnabout fashion, this raises the question of Keemstar's motives. Is Keemstar just that butthurt, or is there something more sinister going on? Is this desperate character assassination from a slimy pedophile just a weak attempt to cash in on a controversy, or is it an attempt from Keem to keep his financial stability at the expense of children, that there's nothing this grizzled sad shell of a man won't do for a paycheck? After all, between Matt and Keem only one of them is really doing it because he actually cares, and the other gets a paycheck from helping keep children groomed. Maybe Keem's hard drive is full of 15 year old girls spreading their butthole like last time, so he really wants to keep videos of 10 year old girls pooping on Youtube so he doesn't have to drive out to Walmart for a $10 thumb drive.

Of course, we all know why he wanted Matt destroyed.

Matt was slandered all across Twitter and Reddit by Keemstar's army of groomed children, and a few of the "braver" ones swarmed the original livestream all at once. Matt stepped down for a spell from his involvement in the movement, since beating the snot out of poor stupid kids is counterproductive to YoutubeWakeUp.

Meanwhile, Outside of Special Ed...

Media Pulls Out

 
Oh noez! Now Youtubers are going to stop making content!
 
Now whose going to pay for RiceGum's solid gold buttplug?

The damage was done, though. Purina, Grammarly, and Fairlife all pulled ads and decided to meet with Youtube because nobody wants to think about child porn while pouring a glass of milk and practicing participles while their dog eats nearby. Several drama whores cried out in anguish, taking a break from talking about how horrible Youtube was to talk about how they were entitled to Youtube's money! They lambasting Matt for being soooooo horrible and threatening them with the possibility of having to get a job and be functioning adults. Couldn't we just overlook the whole thing, since 5,000 gaming channels or a bunch of fat guys in swivel chairs clearly wasn't worth the sacrifice? They were entitled to Youtube's money for Youtube hosting their videos, because they made Youtube (not the mainstream videos that get tens of millions of views within hours, but them, the pathetic trend chasers with less than 30k subs each). Because... you know.. it's not like everyone and their grandmother set up a Patreon for a Youtube channel during the last Adpocolypse.

The entitled crybabies whined and whined, trying to frame the guy who deleted everything prior on his channel as just wanting views, but still ads kept being pulled because, surprise, Matt having an abandoned Twitter has jack all to do with pedophiles in Indonesia. More and more companies started to pull ads. Ikea. Glad. GNC. Epic Games. Even Disney. Youtube knew they were fucked if they kept their thumbs up their asses, and started, for fucking once, addressing the community's complaints in a timely fashion. Youtube deleted a couple thousand channels, locked comments on millions of videos, and proved that they could actually get off their asses and do something, and all it took was emailing a few advertisers. The impact was so great that it even got featured on Bloomberg. Meanwhile the drama whores are still stuck up about Matt, leaving a lesson in how interchangeable and generic most Youtubers actually are, since doing anything more requires effort (meanwhile I'm writing this article for free, and covering this topic better than them, so they can suck my dick).

 

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