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American Dream

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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"Give us your poor, your tired, your huddled masses" was a one-time only offer

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The American Dream. Presented In Technocolor
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The American Reality. Downtown Washington D.C.

The American Dream™ is a marketing tool designed by the bourgeois, capitalist ruling classes to populate the United States of America with loyal puppets and cheap labour. These malleable drones are then used in an intricate charade that is known as "voting" which is used to legitimise a much larger marketing tool called Demockery -a thinly veiled trolling method that America has methodically used to pwn the world through globalization.

Although this has been a hugely successful, long-term exercise in covert empire building, it has backfired in recent years as the architect of The American Dream failed to install safety measures -including a 'circuit breaker'- to stem the flow of aspirants. As of the writing of this there are at least 12,000,000 too many dreamers and the only dreams left are already earmarked for highly educated whites and IT specialists. Thus, The American Dream™ can now be likened to an exclusive club with a velvet rope for the rich and beautiful.

The most prevalent technique of The Illuminati to propagate this myth is the global dissemination of shit television series such as "Baywatch", "CSI:Miami" and "Friends". These shows trick dumb foreigners into believing that, should they move to the U.S, they will immediately have lavish apartments in cosmopolitan cities surrounded by promiscuous women who party 24/7 or bask on sun drenched beaches meeting hot, dumb bimbos with big fag titties who always want teh cock in the back of your classic '69 Camino convertible.

The sad reality is that upon arrival they will be propelled into hideous ghettos where they will have to work 2-job, 20-hour days just to stay above the poverty line and the shame of government issued welfare and food stamps. Meanwhile, when they're not working for The Man, they spend their leisure time running the gauntlet from a bag of mixed nuts ranging from Evangelical Christians on street corners telling them that The Rapture is coming to thieving nigger crackheads, whilst constantly hiding from a Jew who's chasing them for the money they borrowed for their astronomical medical bills.

This all works out beautifully of course for the few pure bread whites that still exist after the last half a century of race mixing with burrito eating, border jumpers from the South and maple syrup loving, Frenchie cowards from the North. While the great majority of America is now really America-lite with a hint of Mexican added for flavoring and the purpose of mowing lawns the few real Americans left out there still hold out hope that the grand scheme will eventually pay off. Sadly, unbeknownst to them, this plan was concocted by the gold-hoarding, oven-avoiding, Jews that somehow managed to survive Adolf's great backyard barbeque of the 1940's. Holy shit! Jews run America? Get the fuck out of here.



The Emperor's Old Rags

 
The Good Old Days
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The American Dream during WW2
 
This sandwichboard was Made in China.

Inside the gated community that is the United States, things aren't much better. The American "middle class" worker toils in anonymity under the illusion that there is some magical pot of gold at the end of the production line rainbow. Working without health insurance, union representation, pension plans or job security (the 'fat' now trimmed from a bygone era before outsourcing when American industry produced most everything an American could want) still deluded that because they live in the most prosperous nation on earth, maybe tomorrow will be better; it never is.

The proud American still believes the hype: that all men are created equal and that they live in the land of the free and the home of the brave. Never mind that they owe their ass to the bank and their arms and legs to credit card companies, the American worker is a cowardly wage-slave that will endure almost anything the boss dishes out to keep a crap job they hope will one day deliver on the promise advertised by the The American Dream™: college educations, fulfilling careers, luxury 4-door sedans, property, flat screen TVs, bright futures and living happily ever after.

Meanwhile the Chinese have not only taken over the means of production, they are the ones living The American Dream™. Owning over 30 percent of the National debt China now finds itself Americas biggest loan shark after having put up with the failing democracies inability to balance its checkbook for the last 40 years. It seems like only a matter of time until they come calling to collect and sadly by then the Jews will have constructed their golden rocket ship and fled the Earth leaving poor white suburbia behind to pick up the tab. This will leave America in a state of poverty so bad that the majority of illegal aliens there will jump back over the fence to get the fuck out of the 4th world status that America has become. Yards will never be the same again.


Give Me The Dream Back Or I'll Blow Your Fucking Head Off

With its insatiable hunger for imports trumping its miniscuial ability to export Americas once mighty industrial base now finds itself on life support waiting for the day when the plug gets pulled and it can die in peace. Add to that the declining value of the dollar and the worlds soon to come shift of buying and trading oil in a new currency, probably Euro's, America is no longer looking so hot. These then coupled with its rising religious extremism tends to lead to one inevitable conclusion: World War 3. Don't worry world they may have guns but fat people run really fucking slowly.

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Coming Soon To An America Near You
 
What America Thinks its going to be like
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What it is actually going to be like


   
 
Fuck yeah bro I'm going to fuck some shit up. It'll all be like Halo and shit. I'll teabag the mothefuckers after I assfuck them with my abrams tank. They'll be all like, "No Kyle No, please we don't want to get fucked any more by your gun turret of justice", but I'll be like, "Oh yea Akmed? Tough shit motherfucker cause' America is here and we are going to rape your shit day and night cause' we can bitches."
 

 
 

Kyle, A typical American


Much like any cornered animal your typical American does not react very well to the knowledge that they won't be owning that 3 story house in the suburbs they've always wanted or having their 2.3 kids to carry on the blood line. No, they're pretty much going to flip their shit once they figure out they are fucked and the dream is dead. How long this will all take is anyone's guess but when it does eventually happen Activision is going to have a slew of kick ass COD games ready to go once the fallout dies down.

"When in doubt shoot something", this of course is a common phrase uttered by Americans at least once a day, everyday, in their lives. A violent animalistic lot Americans are either found eating themselves to death or fucking themselves into a coma. They aren't the smartest people to have walked the Earth yet what's kept them in check, the thing that has held them all back from a massive naked death-fuck-orgy has been the delusion that if they conform they will someday prosper. This simple idea is the cornerstone to holding back Dumbfuckistan from doing what it does best: Blowing shit up.

This dark realization is what has allowed China to be so gracious in the past about asking for its money back and why the majority of the world puts up with America's shit. They're fucking crazy and everyone knows it. The only medication that works is The American Dream™ and God help humanity when it no longer works.