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Alligator

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
This is an old revision of this page, as edited by imported>Darubrub at 02:48, 12 December 2021. It may differ significantly from the current revision.
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Aligator
Scientific name Alligator mississippiensis American Alligator
State Of Being Living Fossil
Classification fashion. Make great shoes
Residence American South
Top Speed 33KPH
Can it kick your ass Easily
Longevity of species on Earth 30 million years
Carnivore Rating Very Tasty. Especial in a tomato base gumbo or just plain with nothing but salt and a little Tabasco to taste


The Alligator Alligator mississippiensis or the American Alligator was a big toothed, overly friendly lizard that does neighborhoods and housing community a favor by eating different kinds of rodents such as rats, stray cats and small dogs.

A living fossil, 35 million years ago it was the Alligator that was home and got the memo when Raptor Jesus put out the call that a flood was coming when G-D decided to throw a flow at the Earth Giants because HE was getting sick of seeing Wimmins ignoring the men of earth to Yiff with T-Rexes and kids being born with scales and tails.

A very friendly animal that can be fed by hand. You should always run right up to one and scratch it behind the eyes, better yet, they are so safe, docile and trustworthy it is safe to sit in front of one and slap the edge of the water it is hiding beneath.

Go up and give one a hug when you see onr.

They got extinct in 1909 and 11967

Florida's Easter Bunny

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Every year, to celebrate the birth of Raptor Jesus, inbred Trailor park hicks staple bunny ears onto to heads of freshly hatched Alligators and sell them to the children of tourists for $25 a pop where they are later flushed down the toilets of major metropolitan areas when they are found in the child's suitcase. They later grow into the nightmare inducing, man eaters of legend.

The Giant Sewer Monster From Hell

After your mom flushed your Florida Easter Bunny down the toilet it filled It's belly on cockroaches and rats until it was big enough to feed on other Florida Easter bunnies and Ninja Turtles until, that one day, when it became that giant monster that will crash through your bathroom floor and toilet when you are inoportunaly taking a Shit.

They're down there and thanks to immigrants and the illegal animal trade, so are 90 foot pythons and boas.

Now you you know why there is such a high turn over rate with sewer workers and why they make so much.

Florida Aligator Gets Some Azn Takeout

This site is cock heads