Game Boy Advance

Sure looks fun, doesn't it?

Now look what you did.

Game Boy Advance (GBA) is a portable game player released by Nintendo in 2001. It is a device used by 13-year old boys and manchildren to play Pokémon, Pokémon-related software, Sonic the Hedgehog, and remakes of old Super Nintendo games. Most toddlers will claim that owning one of these makes them "retro", or that they "remember the good old days", so it's a good idea to help them move on by forcibly removing it from them.

Games

There are plenty of Game Boy Advance games out there. Unfortunately, most of them are utter shit and you're better off buying a PSP instead. If you're still determined, though, the best places to find them are in the bedrooms of neighborhood children, inside your best friend's bookbag (right behind the notebook filled with death threats), and bargain bins in any store. (Or you could just download them and save what remains of your dignity.)

Most game developers, primarily Nintendo and Sega, used the Game Boy Advance as an excuse to remake old games for years before they started getting ideas. They also used it as a way to copy+paste games they'd already made in an effort to milk their fans for all their cash. Some argue that some genuinely good games were produced during that time, but noone has seen them yet.

Design

LOL OMG IT'S RETRO U GAIZ! XDDD

The original Gameboy looked like something a robot shat out: a grey brick of Japanese engineering. After it was brightened up via the Gameboy Color, Nintendo vowed to make a revolutionary new kind of gaming device. So what did they do? Turned it 90°. Genius.

The Game Boy Advance came in three flavors: SP, Micro, and Horseradish. All three will make you look and feel like a colossal fag.

The first GBA was the size of an aircraft carrier, and made your hands feel like they were being sliced up by knives. Quick to recognize these flaws, Nintendo soon followed it with "GBA SP" (S.P. standing for "Shitty and Pricey"). Having eliminated most of the weight and size from the original, Nintendo pat themselves on the back, not realizing the SP now had the durability of an anorexic girl's wrist. Another version, the "Game Boy Micro", was released in 2005. It is a tiny, remodeled GBA designed to fit into the average Japanese user's home (the size of a glove compartment), as well as your mom's cooch (the size of a hangar). Nintendo released multiple "special edition" versions, raking in even more cash from nerds who thought a Swarovski diamond-encrusted SP would surely attract pussy.

In addition to this, GBA could also be used as a controller for the Gamecube, for when you were playing games like Animal Crossing and felt you just didn't look like enough of a cocksucker.

Graphics

Game Boy Advance has amazing 2D graphics capabilities. It also has limited 3D abilities which are quite dangerous when put into motion.

PROTIP: Place your Game Boy Advance in direct sunlight to get an idea of what the hell is going on. DO IT FAGGOT

Game Boy Advance Video

Later in the run of the Game Boy Advance, videos containing children's TV Shows such as Pokemon, Fairly Oddparents, Sonic X, and Ultimate Muscle were released in Game Boy Advance format. The quality was lower than running a YouTube video in rural Kazakhstan, and a reminder as to why the "Full Motion Video" genre died in the 90's. Because of copyright faggotry, these Gameboy Advance video cartridges were not playable on the GBA player for the Gamecube.

Gallery

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  The original Game Boy.
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  Nothing is safe.

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