Encyclopedia Dramatica:Article of the Now/October 19, 2024

The Rapture

According to a few million especially delusional Christfags, mostly Americunts, the world is going to end in 2011 2017 Whenever it happens, starting with the Rapture and Judgment Day on May 21, followed by the actual END OF THE WORLD later in October. This has created an unprecedentedly fine opportunity for trolling. ON the other hand, Christians are being stupid again as they are sending themselves to hell while the atheists can finally live free without Jesus trying to pop-up every three seconds to sell you the Bible.

On May 21, 2011 2017 Whenever it happens, at exactly 12 Noon (Israel Daylight Savings Time), The Rapture™ will come to pass. At that moment, millions of people (though only THE BEST Christians) will suddenly vanish, all around the globe in one shocking moment. They will actually leave their clothes and shoes etc. right where they had been existing moments before. Everyone else will be quite puzzled as their friends disappear before their eyes. Cars and airliners will careen out of control as Raptured drivers and pilots suddenly abandon ship. Even the donated organs of these Christians, whether live or dead will be Raptured right out of the sinner's body.

It will be the most awesome thing the world has ever witnessed.

The billions of innocent babies, cute animals and other people "left behind" on Earth, all doomed losers and not-good-enough Christians, will then have to face the "Tribulation" of pestilence and other fucked-up shit and the emerging Antichrist! and eventually be sent to Hell where they will endlessly drown in lakes of fire, with red demons poking pitchforks in their butts. Finally, on October 21, the whole world will fucking END.

(( We Don't Want To Go. We're Waiting For The End Of The World Party ))

What have I missed?	Mastodon 2 days ago	Pedobear 4 days ago	Kevin Smith 6 days ago