Registration has been disabled and the moderation extension has been turned off.
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.

Riots

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
This is an old revision of this page, as edited by imported>MelniXofia at 03:28, 14 May 2015. It may differ significantly from the current revision.
(diff) ← Older revision | Latest revision (diff) | Newer revision → (diff)
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Riots are a legitimate form of protest in which people with one point of view oppose the view of another group, the contending groups typically settling the difference by throwing rocks. Occasionally one side employs tear gas, shotguns, explosives, or other disproportionate measures of intimidation. Riots are a relatively peaceful tool to settle disagreements and often really lulzy to watch on your TV. The act of rioting is often America's favorite cultural sport after the Super Bowl. Riots nearly always end in a handshake and subsequent friendship between the erstwhile adversaries. LA, London, Detroit, Sydney, Dublin, and Greece are considered the rioting capitals of the world.

This article will cover notable riots throughout the world, and historical analysis of those riots.

The Real Root Cause of Rioting

Riots are not spontaneous violent outbursts, but rather must be understood as reactions to the real and much greater violence inherent in and inflicted by the system. That such reprised historical injustice incites nominal "rioters" beyond human endurance should surprise no one.

Two riots in Seattle put the institutionalized provocation (classist and racist in the respective instances) on shameful display for all the world to see:

Kyrgyzstan 2010

Moar info: Kyrgyzstan.

Kyrgyzstan Riots
Date April 6, 2010 - Present
Frags 88
Third World Yes

The assault on the evil Marxist regime began in April when a small group of protesters stormed government buildings and took officials hostage. The security forces retook the building, only to be forced out by even more rage-filled Kyrgyzs.

The part of the riot people gave a shit about happened the next day, when about 5000 'protesters' gathered, attacking police and looting stores. The rioters were able to overpower riot control and seize their automatic weapons, two armored vehicles, and the tear gas and stun grenades.

Continuing this demonstration of civil rights, the rioters tried to gain access to the Kyrgyzstani White House by driving two trucks into the front gates. Unfortunately, this didn't work. See the result in the picture to the left.

The president then fled the country for Belarus, and the opposition took control of the police and army. And of course, entire thing was all Russia's fault.

Greece 2010

Greek Riots 2010
Date May 1, 2010 - Present
Frags TBA
Third World Soon to be.


Since the current economic crisis, Greece has hit hard times. They are now owned by about twelve surrounding countries, with debt at around 300% of its GDP, meaning they are sinking deeper and deeper in to the shithole that is GREECE! It now has a "junk" rating on its outstanding debt. With concerns of Greece defaulting on its debt, its totally not corrupt politicians have begun work on restoring the country's economic situation. They have proposed getting a bailout from Germany, which would mean raising taxes all around, cutting wages, and becoming Hitler's bitch. The public, outraged at this, have started protesting; some even turning violent. The Greek needed a courageous protagonist in this dire time of need. They needed a hero. They needed Riot Dog.

The One True Hero of The Greek Riots

Emerging as the hero of Greece, Riot dog is its central figure surpassing Zeus himself in notoriety, strength, and courage. He single-handedly is leading the Greeks to victory from their economic oppressors.

Macarthur Park May Day Riots

MayDay Riot
Date May 3, 2007
Frags A greater justice was won this day.
Third World No

The LA May Day riot was less of a riot, and more of a mexican round up and reporter bitch slapping session. Some spics started making trouble, as they usually do, at some initially benign protests. Police respond to their mexican antics with the appropriate action; non-lethal projectiles. If you start shooting, people will generally run away. The beaner reporters clearly have words to say in their slanted media reports, complaining about getting brushed up against after ignoring orders from police officers. They claimed to have not heard the order to return to selling strawberries on the corner and were given a dose of bean bag justice.













Rodney King Riots

Holy shit Rodney King is dead now
1992 Rodney King Riots
Date April 29, 1992
Frags Not enough.(53)
Third World Sort of.

In another case of Black Outrage, The Rodney King riots were the result of some perceived police brutality on some crack head black guy. He first leads police on a high speed chase to avoid a DUI which would have violated his parole(who would have thought?). He then repeatedly ignores orders from the police. He is then tasered with no success due to the amount of crack cocaine and PCP flowing through his system. Police, having exhausted every available option to attempt to subdue this violent, erratic ape, resort to their batons. They eventually beat the shit out of him and he is arrested. Try asking a black person how they would have dealt with this type of violent man and likely you will get some irrational, emotionally charged response. The police were rightly acquitted of charges which began the nigger uprising.


 
 
People, I just want to say, you know, can we all get along? Can we get along? Can we stop making it, making it horrible for the older people and the kids?...It’s just not right. It’s not right. It’s not, it’s not going to change anything. We’ll, we’ll get our justice....Please, we can get along here. We all can get along. I mean, we’re all stuck here for a while. Let’s try to work it out. Let’s try to beat it. Let’s try to beat it. Let’s try to work it out
 

 

—Let's try to beat it. Exactly, Rodney King, in response to the riots.



Don't fuck with koreans you brack asshole.


So in typical fashion, the nigs took to the streets to do what they do best; rioting, looting, setting fires, and murdering. What better way to fight an injustice than to loot local businesses and kill fellow blacks? The people of Koreatown bravely defended their businesses, exchanging gun fire frequently. The police had abandoned the area so the business owners took things in to their own hands. You want stear kolean balbecue? Fuck you asshor.

Anarchy had arrived at the door of Los Angeles. Michael Bolton canceled a concert in the area. Several sports teams moved their games out of the city. George Bush and Bill Cosby made public pleas to end the lulz. I mean violence. A curfew was introduced, and marines and the national guard were called in. The killed a few more people for good measure and after four days peace was restored. In the end, 53 people had died, not half bad.

An Hero Amongst the violence

When blacks had created a de facto segregation in the LA area, they decided to aid in race relations by encouraging a truck driver to stop. Once stopped, the driver was beaten to a pulp by the angry baboons. What was this man's crimes? If you haven't guessed it already, he was beaten for being white. Reginald Denny was his name and he is a fucking martyr. The assailants threw concrete, hit him with hammers, spit on, mocked, and laughed as he lost consciousness. They threw up their gang signs at the news helicopter that caught the entire thing on tape. One particularly smart nigglette that had been playing too much Doom decided it would be a good idea to shoot at the truck's gas tank, unfortunately missing. Reginald survived the onslaught but will never speak or walk the same again. All of the attackers were brought to court and due to a hung jury, were let go. What can we take from all of this? Well, for starters, we can't trust these fucking niggers to go all fucking tribal ape shit the minute they think they can kill someone. The liberal court system that failed to prosecute these men is shameful. The white guilt over Rodney King should not have come in to play. Due to copyright issues, video of the event is rare. Any video seen is likely copyright infringement. That said, here's the video:

   
 
<Reporter> Did you ever figure out why he got beat up like that?

<Bobby Green> He was white.
<Reporter> That was all, huh?
<Bobby Green> Yes.
<Reporter> Just in the wrong place at the wrong time.
<Bobby Green> Yes.

 


 
 

—Moar like: "the wrong race at the wrong time"

Tienanmen Square

Tienanmen Square
Date June 1989
Frags Unknown (Between 100 - 10,000)
Third World Yes

Tienanmen Square was the backdrop for the successful defense of communism by the People's Republic of China against democratic terrorists. The Capitalist pig protesters threatened the security and ideals of the state. The military decided to take action, suppressing the rowdy crowds. At the end of the protests, China attempted to censor all information related to any deaths that may or may not have happened for public safety concerns. They successfully kept photos and information from being released and is the only time ever where the Streisand Effect did not occur.

Tank Man

Nigerian 2010 Riots

Nigerian 2010 Riots
Date January 17th, 2010, March 7th 2010
Frags 992
Third World Yes

On January 17th, 2010 some black Muslims smoked some particularly potent crack and decided it would be a good idea to chop up some Christians while completely ignoring the fact that there were numerous christian gangs in their vicinity. And so, like any self respecting black person, they grabbed their machetes and began going from village to village killing some Episcopalians in the name of Allah. When the Christian gangs got wind of this they grabbed their guns, showing those backwards assholes what superior weaponry can really do.

After being rounded up and arrested, bodies of over 150 dead Negroes were found in wells and sewage systems across Nigeria.

This happened again on the seventh of March the same year, in which around 500 more people died. Point is, black people are dangerous.

UK Poll Tax Riots

UK Poll Tax Riots
Date March 1990
Frags None
Third World No

The UK Poll Tax Riots were a series of protests against a poll tax in the UK, sometimes called the Battle of Trafalgar, drawing a terrible analogy to some other battle of the same name. Margaret Thatcher, then prime minister, was going to impose her poll tax despite nearly universal opposition. The people clearly did not understand that a poll tax keeps the filthy pakis from voting. Demonstrations were set up and nearly a quarter of a million people showed up. Looting and violence occurred but no deaths. In the end, the evil Margaret Thatcher was defeated and the poll tax was repealed shortly after and now blacks can vote. Good job assholes. Here's a video:


lol kill police officers.

2010 Toronto G20 summit

Moar info: G20 Toronto Lollercaust‎.

Toronto G20 summit
Date June 2010
Frags None, unfortunately
Third World No

The G20, a gathering of rich old fucks who run the world to discuss how to make more Jew gold, took place somewhere in Canada. Naturally, the local hippie and college activist population, desperate for attention as always, made haste and prepared themselves to peacefully march on over to the summit for the sake of baby seals and fetuses everywhere. Also naturally, every scrawny little suburb-raised fuck with a ski mask decided to join in and exploit the large crows of sheep-like hippies as a chance to vent some angst on the Man's property.


A SQUARE DIAGRAM OF THE RIOT FOR RETARDS!


Two patrol cars were burned, Starbucks' windows were smashed and jewelers were looted as every cop in Ontario was kept busy holding back the massive wall of unwashed and unshaven zerglings while the Presidents and Prime ministers looked on and fellated each other. On a positive note, at least 150 protesters and hipsters were herded into jail cells where they will be spayed, neutered and put up for adoption.

Unfortunately, a bleeding-heart judge ruled that the police's new and amazing sonic cannons had to have their power level emasculated because of their potential to damage hearing. Some argue that there is no harm in destroying the ears of protesters that never listen to common sense anyways.

Tea Party Protests

This section has been censored by the good folks at Conservapedia for your own good. Do not attempt to recreate this section. Whatever you do, do not click here.


Ukrainian Chimpout

Moar info: Ukraine.

Ukrainian Chimpout of 2014
Date January 2014
Frags 5 so far
Third World Yes

The great Ukrainian Chimpout of 2014 is the result of some political bullshit nobody cares about and an abundance of poverty stricken alcoholics. Ukrainians are known for their firebombs and their keen sense of fashion.


PREPARE FOR BATTLE
World of Maidan About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]


The Tanks are on the Way

Every half hour the Ukranian government reminds protestors that they have dispatched tanks.

Photographic evidence:



Ukrainian Chimpout 2014 About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]


Burn motherfucker, burn.

The end?

See Also

Featured article July 8 & July 9, 2013
Preceded by
Trayvon Martin
Riots Succeeded by
Airplane