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Lizziey

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ATTENTION!
This luser is a lolcow, and should be trolled to death in the usual fashion.
You can help by posting their nude pix or spamming their talk page.

A up-and-coming multi-whore, mostly drama, attention and comment types, lizziey is a LiveJournal troll and batshit crazy. She spends her time delving through LJ, and when she finds something to her interest, especially breastfeeding [1] [2], she links them to herself via complete bullshit. [3] If she is called on the bullshit, or is met with logic and facts, Lizziey will will break down into the standard trollisms: Internet tough guy act, ignorance, name calling, and increased font size. She will also tell you that you spend too much time on the internet and LJ, but this can be taken as truth since her replies in a single post can well be over 9000. [4]

A face only a drunk solider with PTSD could beat on.
Yes, that's really her husband's face. You can see the screams of "HELP" through that retarded smile.
Jizz stains, camera left breast. Excuse me while I go vomit.

Lizziey may try to lay guilt towards people by claiming her mom died, or the fact that that she's been pregnant 7 times, yet failed 4 of those. [5] Call out the Waaaambulance if this occurs.

Hey boys and girls, this isn't Lizziey's husband. What about those ten commandments? She seems to have a penchant for ugly faggots

Lizziey knows the laws

Lizziey owns the Internet copyright to everything she has ever typed [6], and the list of other things she now holds Internet copyrights to include, but are not limited to:

Also, someone call Pedobear because according to Lizziey statutory rape isn't real rape regardless of consent. [7]

Lizziey believes that she can do no wrong, no matter what the laws say, because her husband was in the military and a brother-in-law is a cop. And that gives her an automatic excuse for being a dumb cunt. [8]

OH NOES, NOT THE CHUILDRUN!

Last Thursday, Lizziey's kids were taken from her after one was found wandering around late one morning. When confronted by the police and child welfare, Lizziey claimed that she was legally blind and could not keep watch on her children. [9] However, being legally blind won't keep her from trying to join the marines [10], nor replying to multiple LJ posts. [11]

Children Protection Services, being IRL, didn't believe her and took her kids, and kept them for well over a year. [12] Truly mother of the year material here.

Though, she has gotten both her kids back, plus just had another. [13] [14] Thus proving you can't keep a skank off her back.

And she won't let her kids at your house, if she has them at that point, if you have a gun. Because if you have a gun in your house, you'll obviously have non-USDA regulated meat there too. Never mind that her kids are lock picking geniuses [15] and could successfully unlock the trigger guard and shoot themselves. THE MEAT IS WORSE. TRU FAX!!! [16]

Kids gone? Just get a new one.

Back in 2006 [17] Lizziey had two sons named Seth and Topher. Seth was found wandering outside with no pants on and was taken away by CPS.

Fast forward three years, according to her current LJ profile [18] she has two daughters named Stephy and Annika and a son named Topher. This obviously means that when Seth was taken away by CPS she somehow got a replacement child named Stephy who is now taking Seth's place as the eldest. Checked Lizziey's LJ user profile more closely than perhaps is warranted, noted that first she had Seth Joseph or whatever, and then Stephy Jo. A perusal of the communities she's watching (boob_nazi? really?) revealed "transkids." Most likely, she got Seth back and some series of events led to Seth BECOMING Stephy, as pictures labeled "Stephy" look exactly like "Seth."


Lizziey IS the IOC

Lizziey has deemed that any sport that she does not perform in or endorse is not a sport at all. [19] [20] Sorry Chicago Cubs.

We do not know what specific sport Lizziey is a part of, but rumor is that she's may be waiting for the commissioner of it to get some "free time" to resume his duties.

Going emo

Lizziey apparently tried to become an hero one day [21], but either ultimately failed or chickened out. Any attempts by Lizziey to become an hero again should be met with lulz and encouragement.

Lizziey and Twilight

For some unknown reason, she has the entirety of the first Twilight book on her website. [22]

ED article discovery?

Back in November of 2007, user:Shesaheroingirl came along and blanked this article twice. [23] [24] It was written off as another random dumbass on ED and quickly reverted. But since May 15th, Shesaheroingirl has been back and started editing this article to fit her views, with most of the times roughly matching Lizziey's comment times over on LJ. Special:Contributions/Shesaheroingirl [25] [26] Also, around the same time Lizziey was having a tiff with Rx_suicide, Shesaheroingirl was over on that article, adding valuable information. Also, her and user:Mayclock, who's been editing back Rx_suicide's page, are having a little WikiWar over each other's user pages. So either it is Lizziey, lying her ass off like a good Christian should, or it's someone close to Lizziey, trying to revive a credibility that's been dead for years. Don't worry though, we're working on seeing if Shesaheroingirl's IP from here matches the ones from Lizziey's comments on LJ, because you can't hide that, no matter how much you lie. (If you have it, add it to the talk page, plskthx)

Also jumping on the bandwagon of editing might be Lizziey's Internet posse by adding rickroll without realizing just where in the fuck he's at. [27] Other possible suspects include sane people, people who appreciate the smallest nuggets of truth mixed in with the wash, or otherwise normal people. Or, much like the rest of ED, they did it for the lulz because they might understand what ED stands for, instead of editing back to save face.

The New Man in Lizziey's Life

Just as recently as last week, Lizziey's profile read that she was still married to the man who had to take a leave from the military to deal with her bullshit at home. On June 14, it was announced that she had left her husband and is now in a new relationship that is "so strong". So quick to dispose of her husband for her *soulmate*.


Her age

She looks like she is 40. srsly


Did we really need more?

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Featured article September 14, 2010
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