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Kotakoti: Difference between revisions
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[[Image:Dakota rose shoop.jpg|thumb|Somebody take this bitches copy of Photoshop away from her]] | [[Image:Dakota rose shoop.jpg|thumb|Somebody take this bitches copy of Photoshop away from her]] | ||
[[Image:Kotakoti Side angle.jpg|thumb|There's a reason she doesn't move her fat, fetal alcoholic head in any of her videos]] | [[Image:Kotakoti Side angle.jpg|thumb|There's a reason she doesn't move her fat, fetal alcoholic head in any of her videos]] | ||
[[Image:Kotakotirealface.jpg|thumb|The real face of Dakota Ostrenga]] | [[Image:Kotakotirealface.jpg|thumb|The real face of Dakota Ostrenga]] | ||
[[Image:Kotakotinosejob.jpg|thumb|Just for clarification, she hasn't had rhinoplasty at all; the bridge of her nose just sank into her face naturally]] | [[Image:Kotakotinosejob.jpg|thumb|Just for clarification, she hasn't had rhinoplasty at all; the bridge of her nose just sank into her face naturally]] | ||
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== Background == | == Background == | ||
[[Image:Kotakoti aspiring artist.jpg|thumb|left|Dakota Rose, poster child for Fetal Alcohol Syndrome 2012]] | |||
[[Image:Kotakoti Dakota Rose Kill It With Fire.jpg|thumb|left|]] | |||
Previously mentioned as being the younger sister of haggard, past-it [[camwhore]], Kiki Kannibal (Kristen Ostrenga), Dakota Rose's life has been laced with drama, lies (mostly theirs), a supposed statutory [[rape]], a man dying as a direct result from supposed statutory rape, foreclosure and a shit load of hefty fines. When it comes to being [[white trash]], the Ostrengas pretty much wrote the definition. | |||
Her parents, Cathy and Scott Ostrenga, encouraged [[Kiki Kannibal|Kirsten]] and Dakota from a young age into competitive [[whore|whoring]]. | |||
Getting in contact with Cathy Ostrenga is easier then ever nowadays! All you have to do is follow these simple instructions: | |||
'''01. Acquire defamatory and/or damaging material involving Kiki and/or Dakota''' | |||
'''02. Submit defamatory and/or damaging material involving Kiki and/or Dakota to the [[internet]] and proceed to distibute expeditiously''' | |||
'''03. Wait 30-60 mins''' | |||
'''04. Sit back and chuckle obnoxiously as the [http://images.encyclopediadramatica.ch/5/51/Kiki_Kannibal_Cop_DMCA.jpg DMCA] violations and threats to sue begin rolling in!''' | |||
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Image:Kotakoti Megaphotoshop.jpg|"Dakota Rose, Photoshop? Nawww!" | Image:Kotakoti Megaphotoshop.jpg|"Dakota Rose, Photoshop? Nawww!" | ||
Image:Dakota Rose Webcam.jpg| | Image:Dakota Rose Webcam.jpg| | ||
Image: | Image:Dakota_Rose_Webcam_2.jpg|Kirsten (Kiki) and Dakota stripping on webcam, as is to be expected of cum-hungry, scene-whores. | ||
Image:Kotakoti Loves herself.jpg| | Image:Kotakoti Loves herself.jpg| | ||
Image:Kotakoti Hypocrite.png| | Image:Kotakoti Hypocrite.png| |
Revision as of 01:27, 2 January 2012
Kotakoti, also known as Dakota Rose (real name Dakota Ostrenga), is Kiki Kannibal's younger, slightly more fuckable, suspected Fetal Alcohol Syndrome victim (basically, her mothers a drunk) and serial Photoshop abusing sister.
First recognized to have been embroiled in the Kiki Kannibal Buzznet shitstorm, (circa 2006 - today), Dakota has since decided that she does not want to make the intelligent decision of learning from her older, whore sisters mistakes and has begun making quite a name for herself; namely on 4chan's cosplay & EGL imageboard, /cgl/.
Introduction to Kotakoti
The first thing you need to know about Dakota Ostrenga, is that she's 100% real, and by 100% we mean she lies about fucking everything. Tainted by her older sisters past delusions of internet grandeur, fed up of always being pushed to the back, she's finally beginning to shine. You don't like it? Like Dakota gives a shit, you're all just a bunch of "pedophile lesbians".
Dakota has spent her time over the last year well, furiously troweling on the makeup and taking hundreds of carefully angled photographs, submitting them to various social networking outlets across the web in her desperation to be noticed by anybody. Of course, it didn't take long for her photos to be picked up by the Asian Media, who're well known for their love of children and unfuckable loli's.
Much to Dakotas dismay, it turned out she was only featured on an inferior Asian countries news slot and not the kawaii Japanese national headlines she'd been hoping for. The slot in question was a minor Chinese newscast usually shown between ad breaks who'd aired a piece the previous day on a polydactyl cat and an infomercial on dog sweaters the day before that. Despite this, Dakota will still brag and push it like it is a really huge deal, because she's going to be a famous loli you know.
Youtube and Tumblr users have been seen attempting to leave comments questioning the validity of her looks, only having found them to be hastily removed by none other then Kotakoti herself. Past inquiries have yielded mixed results, Dakota having once revealed that she does in fact wear hair extensions and false eyelashes; has since backtracked completely and deleted all evidence of her having ever said so. There has been speculation regarding the condition of her eyes, which appear to change shape and colour entirely at random, however Dakota has stated that she not wear circle lenses so it must be true. Of course nobody will be able to provide you with caps of her saying any of this on account of her deleting fucking everything. BackgroundPreviously mentioned as being the younger sister of haggard, past-it camwhore, Kiki Kannibal (Kristen Ostrenga), Dakota Rose's life has been laced with drama, lies (mostly theirs), a supposed statutory rape, a man dying as a direct result from supposed statutory rape, foreclosure and a shit load of hefty fines. When it comes to being white trash, the Ostrengas pretty much wrote the definition. Her parents, Cathy and Scott Ostrenga, encouraged Kirsten and Dakota from a young age into competitive whoring. Getting in contact with Cathy Ostrenga is easier then ever nowadays! All you have to do is follow these simple instructions: 01. Acquire defamatory and/or damaging material involving Kiki and/or Dakota 02. Submit defamatory and/or damaging material involving Kiki and/or Dakota to the internet and proceed to distibute expeditiously 03. Wait 30-60 mins 04. Sit back and chuckle obnoxiously as the DMCA violations and threats to sue begin rolling in!
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Don't let mommy Ostrenga see these.. About missing Pics
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