BatteryIncluded

The only badge on BatteryIncluded's userpage. Remember, Wikipedia is written from a neutral point of view.

BatteryIncluded (BI) is an American colostomy bag, troll and Wikipedo. He has made many exceptionally good contributions on Wikipedia, and like most functional and disease-free editors, incited the wrath of an aspie, which is how he came to have an article on this site.

He is a pretty cool guy, calling out deluded engrish speaking fuckwits who exercise their unhealthy obsession with space exploration on Wikipedia, as well as making lies as truths. Starting from 2012 onwards, he is also legitimately interested in the mental health of those who attack him, repeatedly offering suggestions as to how symptoms may be better managed; in reality, he wants them to KILL THEMSELVES, making it look entirely suicidal. For his dedication and concern, he is scorned by at least one autist, whom he baits and trolls until they relapse, providing Battery Included an acceptable excuse to ban them.

2009

BatteryIncluded edits mostly fascinating articles about space and shit, with an edit count well into the thousands. BatteryIncluded made himself an enemy or two, and told them to "write a book", which is Wikipedian for "climb a tower of dicks and eat your way down". He then refused to even acknowledge calls for civility on his part. BatteryIncluded notified the involved editors of the Life article about Stevertigo's editing restrictions, however, he raped his shit and threatened with retaliatory shit. Worse still, BatteryIncluded was raped once for his incivility by William M. Connolley. He also asked that all Martian spiders be moved to the Dark Dune Spots, which seems to be a sensible precaution against Martian spider invasions.

2011

He got involved in an edit war over Astrobiology with Viriditas, whom he accused of using IP socks to delete his shit.

2012

Oh, exploitable! Yes, he drew that.

Whoops!

Between late January and early April 2012, an editor (who is a sockpuppet of Seecrets Bryan Seecrets) was using anonymous IPs to add unnecessary statements to the Phobos-Grunt article, one of the articles he largely contributes. Responding to this, he reverted and deleted most of his shit, and the article was semi-protected was protected as he was persistent in adding it. Initially, Starkiller88 seemed to be insistent on adding claims that the Fobos-Grunt mission would not be repeated, based on speculation that Russia was about to join the European ExoMars program as its partner. As this came to pass, he took the opposite direction, that the mission would be cleared for a repeat, based on the opinion of a single scientist. His efforts to fag up the article's talk page were fruitless. Eventually, BatteryIncluded made a series of outrageous posts in an attempt to get him to stop speaking the truth about the planned repeat mission to Phobos. However, this had no effect, as it simply caused Starkiller to start claiming at every possible opportunity, and with much emphasis as possible, that no other mission could take its place in the future. This was finally resolved according to policy.

Starkiller also claimed the scientists and engineers behind the Phobos-Grunt mission were accused of treason, particularly Alexander Zakharov, who he also claimed would die in 2015 or be "disappeared", cited by a single user-generated content on Pastebin, he attempted to add a page about an operation by Anonymous called "Operation Phobos-Gone", a "campaign" to redress the injustice of a Russian rocketry club being closed following a programming error left a $163 million dollar space probe stuck in low earth orbit, a firable offense in most office settings. This campaign was evidenced by only a twitter account and a shit LiveJournal knockoff journal, but that didn't stop Starkiller88 from writing an article up to cover the whole affair. When asked to account for his creation of a pointless non-article about a twitter feed, Starkiller admitted in broken, near unreadable prose that he himself had started the twitter feed and the journal the article was based upon, appearing to be inciting criminal and vigilante activities against the parties involved in order to make the claims he was adding to these articles genuine. He said he was forced to do so because BatteryIncluded stated the fact that no further Phobos probes were planned. Making this point to him had been the cause of his insistence that there would never be another mission to Phobos.

“   Starkiller88: That's one thing is certain. Operation Phobos-Gone by Anonymous has started because of BatteryIncluded's statements that Fobos-Grunt will not be repeated in any name or form. As of right now, the Fobos-Grunt team has been disbanded. This operation aims to prosecute them so that it will make sure that this fiasco will not happen again. W. D. Graham: So it's something you've created in response to his editing? Starkiller88: Yes, that's WHAT BatteryIncluded said on my talk page last month ...   „     —Starkiller, totally missing the point.     “   Starkiller88: You are the person who caused me to start this operation by Anonymous to target Russian organizations linked with the failed Fobos-Grunt sample return kission. The hackers intend to either silence them or perform vigilante acts on them as what Dmitry Medvedev has suggested. See the redirect discussion. BatteryIncluded: Please double your medication dose.   „     —BatteryIncluded, expressing concern for the health of Starkiller88     “   Starkiller88: OK. I got it. I'm not a paranoid person. I started Anonymous "Operation Fobos-Gone" (@Op_PhobosGone) on Twitter and (on paper.li) because of the fact that Fobos-Grunt FAILED, BURNED, CRASHED (NOT RECOVERED) AND THE MISSION WILL NOT BE REPEATED IN ANY FASHION OR NAME (EVER), and I am a member of The Planetary Society distraught over the loss of Phobos LIFE, which may led to LIFE being abandoned and the team behind it disbanded. The project website of Fobos-Grunt is still online despite after these events, and it is likely to exist forever as it is a junk of IKI's web servers. BatteryIncluded: So now you think that just because you inserted the Anonymous seal in your cheap web site it makes it a reliable source and a "real" Anonymous Operation? Please triple your medication dose and step back from your computer. Really.   „     —BatteryIncluded, telling Starkiller88 to step back from his computer or otherwise. Previous Quote | Next Quote

After having his shit article raped as pure vandalism and smelling the burnt flesh stench of banhammer in the air, Starkiller88 went running like a child to BatteryIncluded in a desperate attempt to avoid being shit-canned, starting a harassment campaign on him. His messages range from his pleads to a supposed "redemption", to a claimed compulsion to vandalize Wikipedia, and lately, to blaming BatteryIncluded for infecting his computer with malware, while he told him not to do so.

“   I'd like to redeem myself. I don't want to disrupt Wikipedia with further false uncited, unverified info. Now I know there will be NO attempt to repeat the Fobos-Grunt mission or any other future Phobos sample return. I knew that earler before March 15. You have to know that. I'll start with ExoMars.   „     —Starkiller88, quivering in fear     “   PLEASE DON'T!   „     —BatteryIncluded, pissing himself in even greater fear.     “   You recall this: "This is the first time you write something coherent regarding the Fobos-Grunt mission, Mr. Starkiller. I'll fix it." on the talk page of Living Interplanetary Flight Experiment. Tell me if I want to repeat this by writing something coherent regarding any mission.   „     —Starkiller88, pleading with BatteryIncluded to remember the good times. Previous Quote | Next Quote

Never forget.

Shortly after this conversation, Starkiller88 went on to user page vandalism with pain series attacks against BatteryIncluded in retaliation for his anger. Despite many contributions to pages such as Anonymous, Malaysian National Space Agency, Future spaceflights, various Malaysian Railways, and Series of Unfortunate Events pages, the editor known as Starkiller88 was permabanned for this, with no administrator willing to challenge this ban who doesn't want to take their full brunt of his wrath. He informed one administrator, Boing! said Zebedee to enact this ban by using fabricated statements, becoming abusive in the process. This would later be followed by ArbCom and BASC, including AGK; that's the reasons why most appeals to the latter were denied without any further reason.

Although his name wasn't added to the list of banned users, BatteryIncluded took advantage of his ban, baiting him with a kitten he gave him, and telling him to step back from his computer or any other computer and kill himself. Of course, he could have infected Starkiller88's computer with malware, putting all of his computer functionality at a very high risk of total destruction in addition to restricting the user from accessing the desktop or the internet for this matter, and notified the authorities including the FBI, Interpol or other police to worry about his case.

Not being a banned loser himself, BatteryIncluded continues to edit without any opposition from others. That is, until August when he made a partial reversion of another editor's edits and engaged in asserting that it introduced scrolling lists and violated common sense. Using his previous incivility against Starkiller88, he once again told Piotrus to stay away from an article to place what he called as his flashy tricks and "Hello Kittys" somewhere. He got a warning, but he deleted several posts to cover up, thereby ignoring it.

His ignorance became apparent when he ran into FitJock87 over the inclusion of VIGO System in the Curiosity rover article. Although this resulted in the information about VIGO is being retained with his corrections that they are just a sub-system vendor rather than its designers, he was intent on watching him. This caused FitJock87 to call him "not only stupid, but also pathetic," similar to the comments from Starkiller88's earlier vandalism of his userpage as being disruptive to make a point responding to BatteryIncluded's incivility.

2013

Still not being banned for his faggotry, BatteryIncluded continues to tell people to kill themselves, and not giving a fuck. May he live a long and healthy live, have five wives and eighty children, and die only when he is good and ready to leave his mansion for his private space station.

After his reversion warring on the 2013 Russian meteor event, BatteryIncluded began wanting another editor, Medeis, to bitch and fight another person who attacked him and take "his meds", killing himself.

On May 2013, BatteryIncluded's behaviour has wormed its way onto Encyclopedia Dramatica. Through Anwar Sadat's Horny Ghost, and later Schnookums and others, they tell him to kill himself.

A "supposed" malware

A frozen screen showing a "kitten" once your computer is infected by BatteryIncluded

First mention of such a malware from BatteryIncluded came about in June 2012 when he was "blamed" for infecting Starkiller88's computer when actually told not to do so, after he first told the editor to step back from his computer.

	“	... and lately, blaming me for infecting his computer with a computer virus/trojan.	„
	—BatteryIncluded, complaining about being blamed as part of Starkiller88's harassment.

Fortunately, it did not happen. If it did really happen, it could have used Trojan horses and extensive social engineering to perform outrageous actions on the computers and its users, in addition to making fabricated claims about them the same way BatteryIncluded makes. These actions include introduction of shit-filled malware the virus gives them, and the use of secondary attacks to generate revenue, as well as causing antivirus and anti-malware software to malfunction. Lately, it could also have crashed the computers, thereby making them unusable and resulting in loss of data stored on them.

YouTube

The obligatory YouTube video declaring war!

External links

• BatteryIncluded
• Wikimedia Commons page of BatteryIncluded
• Youtube account
• The Anon News announcement

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