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| {{wikify}}
| | [http://www.chickensmoothie.com Chicken Smoothie] is essentially a dumbed down version of [[Wajas]], where you can adopt virtual pets and ... that's it. They don't do jack shit. They simply get progressively get [[wolfaboo|bigger and sparklier]] until your eyes explode. This massive circlejerk of furries, special snowflakes, and 12 year-old girls is run by [[incest|Tess and Nick]], two furfags from New Zealand, and their posse of self-important artists. All users are required to keep their juicy mouths on the Admins' e-peens at all times, or they may not be picked for the next Staff position. |
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| '''[http://www.chickensmoothie.com Chicken Smoothie]''' is essentially a [[retard|dumbed]] down version of [[Wajas]], where you can adopt virtual [[sparkledogs|pets]] and then... nothing.[[Image:fattyonaleash.jpg|right|thumb|Every CS user's wet dream.]] They don't breed, fight, or shit, they simply get progressively bigger and sparklier until your eyes [[orgasm|can't take any more.]] This massive circlejerk of furries, sparkle artists, and 12 year-old girls is run by Tess and Nick, two [[furfags]] from New Zealand, and their posse of [[USI|self-important]] [[shitty art|artists]]. All users are required to keep their loli mouths on the artists' e-peens at all times, or they might not crap any [[shit|beautiful]] new dogs next month! The place is begging to be trolled.
| | ==Members== |
| | Chicken smoothie members are [[retard|intelligent]], well rounded [[fucktard|individuals]]. [[Image:csmathfail.png|left|thumb|CS users are very proficient in mathematics.]] What time isn't spent fucking their dogs is put towards designing their totes original [[fursona|fursonas]]. They're known for being [[autistic|incredibly skilled]] artisans, creating masterpiece after masterpiece depicting yiffing dragon-boos in [[Photoshop]]. One look at the site's [http://www.chickensmoothie.com/Forum/viewforum.php?f=29 oekaki] proves that. With such an abundance of skill to choose from, is it any wonder that when an [[special snowflake|artist]] with a small amount of talent does come along, the members [[clusterfuck|swarm]] to them like flies to fresh roadkill? To keep these users coming, [[bitch|Tess]] often gives them the [[no|great honor]] of designing art for the site without any form of pay. Unless you count the armies of fur-fucks throwing pixele wolfs at you, there's no compensation for your [[shitty art|hard work]]. |
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| Deleted
| | ==the Staff== |
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| ==Users== | | ==A |
| Chicken smoothie users are [[retard|smart]], well rounded [[fucktard|individuals]]. [[Image:csmathfail.png|left|thumb|CS users are very proficient in mathematics.]] What time isn't spent fucking their dogs is put towards designing their TOTALLY ORIGINAL [[fursona|fursonas]]. They're known for being [[shitty|incredibly skilled]] artisans, creating masterpiece after masterpiece depicting yiffing canines in [[MSPaint]]. One look at the site's [[oekaki|oekaki]] proves that. With such an abundance of skill to choose from, is it any wonder that when an artist with a small amount of talent does come along, the members [[clusterfuck|swarm]] to them like flies to fresh roadkill? To keep these users coming, [[twat|Tess]] often gives them the [[no|great honor]] of designing art for the site without any form of pay like the [[idiot|official artists]]. Unless you count the armies of furries aching to suck your cock pay, there's no compensation for your [[shitty art|hard work]].
| | ==art shti== |
| | ===Traditional Art=== |
| | Fucking worthless. Don't bother wasting your time. |
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| The users are also almost all illiterate [[christfag|christfags]]. If your signature does not profess how much you [[rape|love]] Jesus, you may as well not even bother posting because the users know that [[you]]'re a hellbound sinner and will give them [[AIDS]]. Does this go hand in hand with the mind boggling levels of ignorance found on this site? You decide.
| | ===Digital Art=== |
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| In addition to this, you will quickly notice that the vast majority of the site's users maintain the mentality that by posting poorly worded rants throughout the forums that they are able to stop animal cruelty. The 'Animal Chatter' section of the site is where this stupidity manifests in all it's narrow minded glory. Threads are fuelled by 'omg dis is so meen' responses, of course, whining about it will definitely stop people raping puppies! There is also a massive double standard when it comes to animal cruelty. Remember kids, it's inhumane to visit a petting zoo, but it's deemed acceptable to get your cat de-clawed, because you're too fucking lazy to teach your [[retarded]] pet not to scratch your [[shit]]!
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| | ==Advent calendar== |
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| The [[stupid|elite]] users of Chicken Smoothie are those that have spent the most time whoring themselves out for pixel dogs. They pride themselves on their huge collections of pets that they've acquired through many long, sexless nights <strike>while their friends went out to have actual lives</strike> [[Disregard that|Disregard that]], CS users have no [[IRL]] friends.
| | ==Anthrocon== |
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| ===Forum=== | | ==tumb1r drama== |
| [[Image:CSlulz1.png|right|thumb|OMG U INSULTED [[Jesus|JAYSUS]] AND MADE HIM CRAI U GO TO HELL WITH THE BIBLE.]]Exploring the forums in any sort of depth is an invitation to be [[bukkake|bukkake'd]] with stupidity. Not surprisingly, the fact that everything revolves around animals has made this a [[furry|furry]] paradise, where people from all over can talk about their [[beastiality|love]] for wolves and [[Mr. Hands|horses]] and fish, oh my. They even have a thread on [http://www.chickensmoothie.com/Forum/viewtopic.php?f=18&t=93144 how BAAAAAD fish are treated], along with the usual "I want to suck wolf dick so badly!!!111!1" threads. Ironically, despite all their complaining about wanting to be an animal more than a human, or how awful humans are for hurting animals, they sit around on their fat asses in front of a manmade computer all day, clicking and collecting pixel dogs instead of [[hypocrite|actually going outside to help animals]].
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| Engaging in a debate with a CS user will quickly degenerate into replies made of [[ALL CAPS|excessive caps]], abuse of exclamation marks, and whining about what a mean poopyhead you are. While animal threads are most popular, threads inviting users to whine about their insignificant teenage problems take a close second.
| | ==haha sorry== |
| | | I was going to revamp this but I'm real lazy lmao |
| ==Admins== | |
| [[Image:NickDog.png|left|thumb|One of Nick's [[disgusting|beautiful]] creations]]When the site started, Tess was the sole admin. She drew dogs and rats which [[midget|didn't grow at all]], and the site had no account system because [[fail|she couldn't code one.]] Soon she [[Scientology|recruited]] her brother Nick to help with the coding and the art for a few adoptables. Nick sucks less dick than the rest of the staff, but he still can't code for shit.
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| Tess, on the other hand, has now [[lazy|delegated]] everything about the site to other people. Other people do the art, moderate the forum, and code the site, and Jew only pays them in [[worthless|virtual money]] for it. She even had her brother make adoptables, resulting in art that looks like it was scribbled by an autistic toddler on [[LSD]]. She can't seem to manage her staff, who rampage through the forums doing whatever they please, and she doesn't have the [[balls]] to fire the untalented and tracing members of her artist team. She also blocks all PMs from the members, so if one of the [[retarded|helpful]] moderators bans [[you]] for posting a [[bestiality|picture of your dog]], OH WELL! It's not clear what she actually does besides handing out super speshul custom [[sparkledogs]] to anyone who [[blowjob|sucks up]] long enough and [[hax|haxing]] herself uber rare pets.
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| ==Artists==
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| Without a doubt, one of the most [[USI|self-important]] group of shits on the internet, CS artists believe they're doing the world [[Image:EquimaginePonyExample.png|right|thumb|Typical CS pet design]]a favor by gracing Chicken Smoothie with their art. Every month, they expect users to worship their latest paintbucketed pixels, and any who don't can look forward to being mobbed by the masses of cocksucking white knight furries. [[Crap|The resulting pets]] are excellent examples of how ''not'' to use default brushes and the smudge tool, featuring messy coloring and unoriginal markings. The artists' favorite pastimes are flouncing around the forum being rude to users and abusing their moderator powers. They are every bit as delusional as the members; most are furries, one is a [[Nazi]], and one believes so strongly that she's a [[Twilight|vampire]] that she drinks [[Image:Creativityatcs.png|left|thumb|I shit you not, these are passed as two completely different designs.]][[cum|blood]].
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| Not only are the artists incompetent at coloring cartoon dogs and horses, a good portion of the site art is traced! Yes, though the forums have an [[RAGE|angry]] message at the top of every art subforum warning that tracing will get [[you]] the banhammer, their own artists trace the site adoptables. The site [[idiot|admins]] are aware of their tracing artists, but are too chickenshit to fire the ones responsible, fearing [[butthurt]] from the users. As hard as they go at newbies and small-time artists for theft, official artists and popular members get off scott-free. Anyone who tries exposing them for being thieves face the banhammer, as well as their posts being [[DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING|deleted]].
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| ====Malk====
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| The most popular artist on the site, Malk is an artist from [[France|France]]. She makes her own versions of the adoptables, which are actually good when compared to the rest of the site [[shit|art]]. However, she is more rude, stuck up, and generally [[USI|full of herself]] than the rest of the staff combined; [http://www.chickensmoothie.com/Forum/memberlist.php?mode=viewprofile&u=481 her signature] is a perfect example of this. Despite her blunt, abrasive personality, she is worshipped by the [[fantard|fantards]] as an [[LOL|artistic god]].
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| Malk once had her own site, but was too [[stupid]] to make it work, and the whole thing went to shit. Refusing to give up on her [[shitty art|crappy site]], she merged it with Chicken Smoothie, and now is part of the CS staff.
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| [http://www.chickensmoothie.com/Forum/viewtopic.php?f=16&t=1350491 On August 16th, 2012, Malk officially retired from CS.]
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| ====equimagine====
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| Equimagine is the site's resident horse artist, shitting out painfully bad equines every month without fail. The only reason she's on the team is that she traced some horses and offered to let Tess use the lines for free. Jew, not wanting to pay real artists to make horse adoptables, immediately accepted. [[Truth|Nobody fucking likes her art]]. Users avoid her designs like the plague. Those that do bother adopting them shove them deep into their collections and only have them [[Pokemon|for completion purposes]]. Equimagine is also the site artist most guilty of tracing. While others have traced here and there, it's doubtful that ''any'' of her art is [[original content|original]].
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| On December 1st Tess announced that [http://www.chickensmoothie.com/Forum/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=352843 equi had 'retired'] as an artist from the site and that Jew is taking over her position.
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| ====Shima.Luan====
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| Yet another tracer on staff. She used to run a popular art shop, selling traced artwork and recycling commissions by recoloring them for new customers. [[retard|For some reason, the users never realized they were getting old, recolored commissions for the price of custom artwork.]] She never bothers posting anymore, just stays behind the scenes reusing the same three designs in all of her dogs when she can't find other people's designs to rip off. The users of course, possessing the collective IQ of a dead [[vagina|fish]], praise her designs every month as new and original art. [[Furry|Shima]] also [[tracing|draws]] furry porn on [[FurAffinity|FagAffinity]] for IRL money, pulling the same dishonest tactics on the hapless furries as she does with CS users.
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| {{cg|Gallery of Chicken Smoothie's Traced Art|Gallery of Traced Art|center|<gallery>
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| Image:EquiExample1.png|Interesting, users were told these lines were retired for stylistic reasons
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| Image:EquiExample2.png|These are still in use though
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| Image:DraftOverlay1.png|Artistic integrity, right here
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| Image:TracedShimaFox.png|Foxes too!
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| </gallery>|<gallery>
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| Image:EquiExample3.png|And another traced horse
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| </gallery>}}
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| ==Mods==
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| [[Image:CSmodfail.png|left|thumb|A CS mod [[Doing it wrong|trying to be funny]].]]Mods and artists go hand in hand. Some site artists are unfortunately also moderators, and bring the same incompetence and USI they're so well known for in their art to the modship.
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| The actual mods aren't much better, often just [[oldfag]] [[loli|lolis]] with ego problems. They [[faggot|flit]] around the forums, being rude and [[GTFO|unfriendly]] to new users and genuinely confused people, while ignoring the [[cancer|actual problem posts and users]]. Those who remove their lips from the cocks of the staff to voice anything other than praise are of course subject to the [[banhammer|banhammer]]. They hardly listen to the users, and usually let things go to hell until the whining masses threaten to overrun the place.
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| ===Sorren Fey===
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| [[Image:Sorren.png|right|thumb|Sorren: [[Kewlies|Just That Cool]].]]The same mod that was [[Doing it wrong|trying to be funny]], Sorren Fey is, without a doubt, the rudest mod on the CS mod team. Sorren only posts to tell someone off. As per usual on shitty [[otherkin|adoptables]] sites like these, plenty of [[12 year old girls|users]] bow down to [[twat|mods]] like Sorren to suck her [[e-penis|e-peens]], even signing up to this site to delete her article or turn it into a thing of [[vomit|praise]]. Or, perhaps more in-line with Sorren's piss poor behavior, Sorren herself vandalizes the article to [[BAWWW|make herself feel better]].
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| ===Mini-Mods===
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| With the actual [[fucktards|mods]] having their heads stuck too far up their asses to actually do their jobs right, [[all|many]] of the users take it upon themselves to bring down the [[drama|righteous fist of justice]] upon other members, who are usually either new users looking for help or another user expressing their love for an animal that isn't a wolf. These [[16-year-old girl|mini-mod users]] tramp around the forum being [[unwarranted self-importance|helpful]] and making posts in [[ALL CAPS]] to anyone they deem to be [[doing it wrong]]. When other users fail to respect their [[butthurt|authority]], they resort to threats of [[OMG|reporting them]] if they don't drop it, while seemingly unable to leave without getting the last word themselves.
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| ==Drama==
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| While Chicken Smoothie lacks in [[fun|major drama]], the users make up for that with constant petty drama and shitstorms. The most popular reason for starting a [[nerdrage|catfight]] with another user is of course, a "stolen" character or fursona.
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| Signs of a Stolen Character
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| *Same eyeburning shade of hot pink
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| *Has [[scene|scene hair]], just like theirs!
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| *Has a speshul necklace given to it by its dead mother, that's their [[no|original]] idea!
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| *Has their [[unoriginal|unique]], trademarked swirly markings
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| *Is also a bat-winged wolf; that's ''their'' species!
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| When not [[BAWW|crying]] about that, users like to spend their time raging at people who [[gore|rip off]] [[n00b|new players]] while simultaneously doing the same thing. They also enjoy sending rude messages to people who ignore their trade offers or don't offer highly enough on their favorite neon wolf. Polite, mature users are nonexistent or soon driven off.
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| ====Notable Threads====
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| '''Furry Thread''': Predictably, this is one of the most popular threads. Most posts are made by [[13 year old girl|13 year old]] [[furfag|furfags]] bitching about [[fursecution]], and then in the same breath yammering about [[no|normal]] activities like [[pedophilia|yiffing with minors]] in furry cybersex [[orgy|parties]]. All other posts are pictures of their cum-stained homemade fursuits and [[MSPaint]] drawings of their fursonas. Frequented by batshit insane [[lulzcow]], [[Meisuweasel]], and run by Meisu's spineless buttbuddy, Jerry.
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| '''Otherkin Thread''': Just what it sounds like, a thread full to [[inflation|bursting]] with especially delusional [[furries]] who really believe they're wolfdragons and winged foxes. Mostly talk about [[autism|acting like animals in public]] and complaining about how misunderstood they are u gaiz. Anyone who suggests that they are actually insane or shouldn't bark in public is met with the blood curdling [[bawww|rage]] of their [[FYIAD|animal spirits]] and MUST be a troll. Frequented by Engrish spewing moron, [[Kuwaizair]], and run by an extra bitchy passive-aggressive furfag with a God complex, [[autism|Wendigo]], who thinks she's [[noob|ttly leet]] and originally wrote this part of the article to [[asspat|big herself up brah]]. Wendigo has [[homosexual|many asslicking sycophants]] who praise her like jebus and approve of everything she does. They all hang out together on their wittily but aptly named bitching forum, [http://www.skinlesschicken.proboards.com/index.cgi Spineless Chicken], where they swim and rub each other in their communal pool of self-righteous semen. In particular [[16-year-old girl|Kamaliah]] spends much time one upping and bitching with Wendongo. Kamaliah likes to swan around ChickenSmoothie minimodding and sticking her retarded and unwanted two cents in everywhere, wetly slapping people in the face with her minimoddy wang of righteousness, probably while [[fapping|rubbing herself]] while she does so. But it's okay because she has her [[rimming|nose so deep]] in Wendongo's cavernous anus that nobody can hear her anyway.
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| '''Any Thread About a Controversial Topic''': Biblethumping [[christfag|Jesus freaks]] vs [[you|normal people]], shitstorms ensue.
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| '''Wolf Awareness and Conservation thread''': Lonely [[wolfaboos]] bawwwing about how humans are "omg so meen :(" for how wolves are treated in America. Run by notable [[beastiality|dog humper]] sublime, who also is known for going [[batshit insane]] and throwing a fit when someone who doesn't think wolves are THE BEST ANIMAL IN THE KINGDOM11!!ONE! shows up. Tread lightly in this thread, because if you aren't familiar with how a wolf's dong feels in your ass, you'll be pinned as a selfish, arrogant hoominz, a wolf hater, and unfit for their furry utopia.
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| This place needs the ever loving shit [[Do it faggot|trolled out of it]].
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| '''The Things that Annoy You Thread''': One of the fastest moving threads on the whole websites. It is full of [[12 year old girls|12 year old]] rants about how their parents won't buy them $300 phones and [[attention whore|wanting more attention]] for their [[shit|art]]. There is guaranteed drama on the thread as long as the mods aren't [[lazy|sitting on their arses.]]
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| ==Gallery==
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| {{cg|Lulzy Screenshots|Gallery of Lulz|center|<gallery>
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| Image:Cslulz6.png|The general hivemind of the otherkin thread. It's almost too terrifying to laugh at.
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| Image:Shitcross.png|Jesusfaggotry at its artistic finest.
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| Image:Lolirony.png|Sorren Fey, talking about the [[serious business]] that is CS art.
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| Image:Lolirony2.png|The image in question. That's totally [[Fail|art theft]].
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| </gallery>|<gallery>
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| Image:Cslulz8.png|More Otherkin asshattery.
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| Image:Hoshinowtf.PNG|I always knew where babies came from, even when I was one
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| Image:Niniaanimalinthesack.png|the private lives of otherkin
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| Image:CSlulz9.png|Someone shoot this fuckwit.
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| Image:Kittyluveridiot.PNG|more on the breeding habits of otherkin
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| Image:Arekushisuidiot3.PNG|my friends call me crazy because I bite them all the time
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| Image:CSlulz10.png|Seriously.
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| Image:Cslulz7.png|And you die a little more inside.
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| Image:CSlulz9001.png|YOU LIKE WOLVES OR YOU GET OUT OF MY THREAD. NO DIFFERENT OPINIONS ALLOWED.
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| Image:Csgothdisease.png|Quick guise! I think I might be catching Nonconformity Syndrome!
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| Image:HOLYFUCKITSCAPSTIME.png|DOES NOT COMPUTE. Also [[How do i shot web|how does one didget pic?]]
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| Image:Jesusraepcs.png|[[Rape|He sees you when you're sleeping...]]
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| Image:Free Art.png|[[shit|Free art is good art!!11!11!!1!]]
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| Image:runsinthefamily.png|Says the queen of bullshit spewtery.
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| Image:Cslulz12.png|Raping their cats is a pastime of CS. See what spelling does to one's context?
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| Image:Cslulz13.png|[[What]].
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| Image:Tessfuckingfails.jpg|Don't you dare offer critique on how to improve someone's art!!
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| Image:Wendigobitches.jpg|Haters gonna hate.
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| Image:Csartfails.jpg|I'd much rather pretend my art is good than hear tips on how to improve!
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| Image:Disartisamazin.jpg|And the drawing and critique that caused so much [[BAWWW]].
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| Image:Csvampires.png|They're [[Twilight|vampires]] too!
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| Image:Iaza11867158828000.png|Tess covers her tracks after this article was discovered, unwilling to admit that her site is built on bullshit lies.
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| Image:Flurp.png|It's so [[Whaaambulance|disrespectful]] to not believe in [[Christianity|our religion]]! [[BAWWW|Geez]].
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| Image:Slurp.png|Srsly.
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| Image:Kamaliah_raegquit.png|Kamaliah: defender of over-reacting drama llamas everywhere.
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| Image:Watanimalsarebugs.png|wait? bugs are animals?
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| Image:Bugsarentanimalsrite.png|kuwaizair is stupid, she thinks bugs are animals
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| Image:Whocaresaboutbears.png|CS users care about all animals
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| Image:Wtfcsdemons.png|how to be cool on chicken smoothie
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| Image:Typicalcspost.png|ebil hyooomannnz!
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| Image:Isdealwingmean.png|A pet expert shows their skills
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| Image:Crulatoanimals.png|don't buy products crula to animullss
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| Image:Humansisntkilled.png|I don't comprehend
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| Image:Malk's Friendly.png|[[Crybaby|Malk at her finest]].
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| Image:Letsbreedfuckoutofcats.png|don't tell her not to back yard breed
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| Image:Xianisarace.png|the right way to deal with bigots
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| Image:Dockingisgood.png|Cutting up your pets is the kindest thing you can do.
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| Image:CSchubbychaser.png|The sound of fat chicks walking is [[Sick Fuck|hot]]
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| Image:Kerostupid.png|her eyes really glow in the dark people
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| File:Picture0888.png|Omnivore unicorn lol
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| File:Piceeeeeture_5.png|Omgee! They copied my soooo original fursona wolf! BAAAAWWW
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| File:SssPiceeeeeture_5.png|The logic fail
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| File:Csimmaslut.png|child appropriate topic
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| File:16orphanpregnant.png|cool story bro
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| File:Cswhydotheytreatmeaskid.png|a CS users is oppressed
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| File:Cswhatisspaying.png|cs users know their stuff
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| File:Csihavepetwolf.png|true story, don't dismiss the possibility!
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| File:Csworkswithbears.png|look at me!
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| File:Csdryhumprp.png|so cute!
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| File:Cscoyotesarendanger.png| give them credit, they know other animals but wolves exist
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| File:Sociopathfunction.png|sociopaths don't always abuse animals, not all animal abuses are psychopaths
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| File:Csfartrant.png|.......
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| File:Spirtwolfrp.png|typical RP on CS
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| File:Csiwantanewdog.png|mommy got me the wrong dog! bawww
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| File:Cslostitall.png|poor thing! :(
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| File:Csbarbaricpettingzoo.png|stop the abuse!
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| </gallery>}}
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| ==See Also==
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| *[[12 year old girls]]
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| *[[Furries]]
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| *[[Sparkledogs]]
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| *[[Wajas]]
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| {{Cyberpets}}{{Furfaggotry}}{{Gaming}}[[Category:Sites]]
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