Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance

Actual gameplay. Living in a box, living in a cardboard box

Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance (also known as Metal Gear Raiden) is the ninth game in the Metal Gear series. Originally teased right after the launch of MGS4 as Metal Gear Rising, the game concept was too metal for Kojima himself to fuck up, so it was handed over to motherfucking Platinum Games much to the disappointment of Metaru Gia fanbois. However, demand for the game remained high since fanbois enjoy jerking off to Raiden's tight cyborg ninja ass. The game is full of brain-melting bullshit ripped from the Metal Gear Solid series, couched in the sublime and elegant drama of cyborg weeaboo sword-fights. Like every Metal Gear game, this one spawned a massive cult following with fans spewing related memes to death like they did with Portal.

Plot

Since this game takes place in the future, Snake, the Patriots, and other related jerkoffs are not part of the plot. Game director Hideo Kojima designed it to be a spin-off, and then handed the writing off to his bottom bitch interns because he was too busy fapping to Quiet.

Players assume the role of Raiden, who was smart enough to abandon his dead lying bitch girlfriend Rose and worthless son so he could return to the battlefield. After being defeated by a katana-wielding wetback, he ditched his old cyborg body for something with more teenage appeal and set out to defeat an army of cyborg terrorists.

Gameplay

Pretty much all you need to beat this game.

There is no need to describe how easy it is to be good at this game as long as you can parry every enemy attack and then rape them with QTE slow motion sword slicing.

Characters

Maverick Security Consulting, Inc.

Raiden - He is back and more homosexual than ever, showing off his tight cyborg ass in every combo. After losing to Sam and failing to protect Nelson Mandela, he became a cyborg and swore to destroy all the baddies with his tools of justice.

Boris - Raiden's russkie boss. Always complaining about rules of engagement or some such nonsense.

Kevin - Token black man. Affirmative action exists even in the future.

Courtney - Retarded cunt who always spills her coffee like a retarded cunt. Comedy!

Doktor - Ich liebe Kapitalismus! A German cyborg scientist with a German accent, very clever Kojima.

Sunny - She is also back, serving as pedobait for gamers by showing off her delicious flat chest.

Blade Wolf - A cybernetic dog that somehow survives to becomes Raiden's partner after being sliced into thousand pieces.

George - A homeless Guyanese kid who doesn't speak English. He was kidnapped by a pedophile and sent to some filthy laboratory in a Mexican sewer where most of his brain was scooped out before he managed to escape. He is nothing more than comic relief.

Desperado Enforcement, LLC

Problem, cyborg?

"Jetstream" Samuel Rodrigues - A Brazilian weeaboo who cuts off arms and doesn't afraid of anything.

Mistral - Your typical Albert Camus sand nigger from France. Known for having many arms and wielding a polespear.

Monsoon - A Cambodian douchebag who never shuts up about his frigging memes. Also known to be the hardest boss in the game because of MAGNETIC POWER, JACK! NATURE'S POWER!

Sundowner - A Californian with an inexplicable southern accent who wants to top the high score made by the Jews. This badass is also FUCKING INVINCIBLE!!! until Raiden comes along and slices him into a million pieces.

Steven Armstrong - A liberal-hating, football-playing, true American ex-Marine Senator who wants to turn the country into a land where the rich are free to troll the poor as hard as they want. Senator Armstrong is known for being the hardest object known to man due to the power of NANOMACHINES, SON!, and nearly beating Raiden to death without actually visibly damaging his cyborg body. Could have gone pro if he hadn't joined the Navy.

RULES OF NATURE

This game's soundtrack is far more addicting than its gameplay, so addictive that it has its own Guile theme. It is also the reason for a bunch of shitposting on /v/, where anons argue which OST is the best.

Previous Video | Next Video

Previous Video | Next Video

Memes, Jack! The DNA of the soul!

RED SUN WASH AWAY THE ANGER!! STANDING HERE!! A STRANGER I REMAAAAIIIIIIIN!!!! DO NOT WANT Senator Steven Armstrong, showing his opinion of American pride.

External links

Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance is part of a series on Gaming Visit the Gaming Portal for complete coverage.