For the evulz

This page relies entirely on facts. Fact Cat knows this because of his learnings. Sorry for the lack of dick jokes.

Some men just want to watch the world burn.

For the evulz is generally known as the motivating factor behind a lolocaust of butthurt triggered by the "I don't give a damn" school of thought. A cursory glance of the subject would lead one to believe that it is identical to another motivation known as for the lulz. While superficially similar and sharing the same general sort of outcome, the two are, in fact, wholly separate concepts.

On the nature of evulz

Whilst enacting rectal trauma via the for the lulz method is accomplished by active participation in an event to further the noble aim of schadenfreude, the for the evulz approach is largely the inverse. Evulz are generally, though not exclusively, brought about by decided passivity in the face of some danger or threat. Due to this nature of evulz' advent, its effects tend to be far more pronounced. Whereas a victim of lulz may engage in a flame war, start a petition, begin e-begging, or simply going outside, the victim of evulz is not so fortunate. The aftermath of evulz may result in, but is not limited to, destruction of property, bodily injury, rape, death, and even war.

The purview of evulz is more constrained that that of lulz. For this reason, scholars, theologians, savants, and other pseudo-intellectuals with more unwarranted self-importance than common sense have angrily shrieked among themselves in an attempt to codify the subject since the dawn of human civilization, each invariably contributing more spittle than wisdom.

The great and powerful minds of Encyclopedia Dramatica, in stark contrast, have crossed that final precipice into deciphering the true nature of evulz. Having long ago devised The Comprehensive Theory of Lulz, we are uniquely qualified to put the matter to rest.

Identifying evulz

The first and foremost qualifier in this regard is motivation. To perform, or not perform, an act for the evulz requires the following preparatory mindset.

1. Because I can.
2. I don't give a fuck.
3. And fuck you anyway.

Haughty disdain, therefore, is the order of the day. Further among the criteria is the result. At least one of the following effects, or something reasonably similar, is required.

1. Terror or hysteria amongst a populace. Failing that, an individual will suffice.
2. Physical harm brought against a person, persons, domiciles, or places of business.
3. Lasting animosity between parties not including the instigator of evulz.
4. Lingering malignancy that cannot possibly be rectified with dog curtains or turning off the computer.

For these reasons, among others, actions wrought for the evulz tend to have more severe and longer lasting consequences compared to those performed for the lulz.

Myth and Fact

People tend to confuse these admittedly superficially related motivations. Here are a few case studies, presented for your edification.

Adolf Hitler

A great many (ill informed) people claim that Hitler was humanity's greatest concentration of evil to ever exist in a single person, and so they naturally ascribe his motivations as for the evulz. This is patently incorrect, as whether you think of was the devil himself or that he did nothing wrong, he clearly performed his actions to strengthen his nation.

Joseph Stalin

While clearly more self centered than Hitler, as the latter was primarily an ideologue, Stalin didn't really fit the mold for evulz. Sure, he banned the church and persecuted its adherents, but he did so to increase the state's authority and making things easier on himself. He did, however, perform at least one act of evulz; he declined a prisoner exchange involving Yakov, his son, for a German Field Marshal, saying

“	I will not trade a Marshal for a Lieutenant.	„

Imperator Nero

Nero's most infamous act was fiddling while Rome burned around him. Why? He simply didn't give a fuck, one way or another. That, gentle reader, was an act done for the evulz.

Alexander the Great

While not nearly as mentally unstable as Nero, Alexander is primarily remember for two things: bringing the rape train to large swathes of land around him, and what he said upon his death bed.

“	To whom shall you leave your empire, lord?	„

“	To the strongest.	„

In this act, Alexander clearly gave no fucks as what happened to the empire he built, as he wouldn't be there to rule it, and in this callous disregard he ensured that his death would herald greater conflict than he had seen in life. Truly, this far reaching apathy guaranteed him a seat in Evulzhalla.