Devin Patrick Kelley

Devin Patrick Kelley
Nationality:	Americunt
Highscore	26 killed, 20 injured
Top 25?	#14, #5 USA
Style	FPS, Single player
An Hero?	Yes
Motive	Angry at Mother-in-Law

As if the constant shootings in these past few months weren't a sufficient example to get politicians off their ass and put any action into their words. The angry, violent, wife beating, child abusing young loser known as Devin Patrick Kelley from New Braunfels, Texas drove a long 35 miles to San Antonio to shoot up a church, killing 26 people and injuring 20 others before getting into a high speed chase with police, getting shot and dying at the scene at the age of 26. At this point not much is known of Kelley, other than he served four years in the military before being dishonorably discharged and court marshaled for physically assaulting both his wife and child. Apparently he had a colorful history of violent stupidity, aside from just beating his wife and child and yet somehow he managed to pass a background check and purchase a gun, which seems to indicate a serious flaw in the way background checks are done, or what (if any) relevant criteria is compiled into them. I mean, here's a thought; if someone is so violently stupid they attack their own child... probably not a smart idea to sell them a firearm.

This makes Devin the deadliest and second youngest mass shooter on a church beside Dylann Roof, who was 21 at the time of his spree. The difference between Kelley and Roof is that the former managed to have a better kill to injury ratio.

“	In this moment, I am euphoric. Not because of any phony god’s blessing. But because, I am enlightened by my intelligence.	„

Nobody Could Have Seen This Coming

File:Devin Patrick Kelley - FaceBook Gun Post.png

Oh, wait a minute. Here's a fun thought that'll get your mind thinking hard: if you have someone as a friend on social media that you've known for a long time and they unexpectedly start posting pictures of guns just completely out of the blue... most likely not a good sign and you should report them so they get V&. Especially if they happen to be somebody with a political view that is anti-cop or anti-government in general, somebody diagnosed with a mental illness, socially awkward, a virgin, child or wife beater, heavy casino gambler, or Muslim.

Graded Score

Graded score
Kill count:	26/20 One kill shy of Adam Lanza
Accuracy:	18/20 46 hits in a room of about 50 people
Style:	5/20 Edgelord tactical gear.
Butthurt:	15/20 Deadliest shooting in Texas and dead kids.
Bonus:	10/20 Subjected the world to Texas on a Sunday.
Total score: 74/100 (C)

Path of the Righteous Man See full ranking

Wanted Level:
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S.W.A.T. Team

External Links

• Sutherland Springs church killer identified as Devin Patrick Kelley
• Devin Patrick Kelley: What we know about the Texas church shooting suspect
• Devin Kelley: 5 Fast Facts You Need to Know
• Sutherland Springs church killer identified as Devin Patrick Kelley