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Lesbian bed death: Difference between revisions

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[[Image:Death_bed.jpg|thumb|An example of lesbian bed death]]
#REDIRECT [[Lesbian Bed Death]]
This term is used by [[faggots]] to refer to the fact that once [[lesbians]] move in together, settle down and get older, they tend to ''never have sex with each other ever again'', unlike [[gays]], who just have sex with any asshole they can find.
 
==It's Inevitable==
 
[[Image:Lbd.jpg|thumb|The [[awesome|sad]]-yet-inevitable fate of all lesbian couples.]]
As anyone with a penis would know, it's difficult to get a woman [[sex|into bed]] especially when married. But when there are two women involved with no [[cock]] pestering them there is [[noone]] in the relationship who gives a [[shit]] about [[sex]] anymore, therefore causing [[lesbian]] bed death.
 
It is also [[common knowledge]] that [[lesbians]] are [[fat]] and [[fugly]], making sex with them repulsive. When both members of the relationship are that unattractive of course they're not going to have sex, [[noone]] would.
 
Another factor contributing to lesbian bed death is the fact that [[noone]] really likes munching carpet and, for fuck's sake, they're not going to want to do that for the rest of their life.
 
==[[Whores]]==
The reason for Lesbian Bed Death is that women are whores by nature, [[Fact|and will not fuck unless they are getting paid]]. In a heterosexual relationship, the man pays, and the woman puts out every now and then when she feels like it. In a [[sin|lesbian relationship]], each partner expects the other to be ponying up the fancy gifts and stuff, [[divide by zero|so the situation deadlocks]].
 
==The Solution?==
[[Cock]], [[an hero]], [[Necrophilia|more cock]]
 
==Salvation?==
 
There is a new breed of [[Slut|young and genuinely cute lesbians]] on the rise, which may someday make this lamentable fact of lesbian life a thing of the past, along with the Birkenstocks/overalls/fatness prerequisites, although probably not the unhealthy Indigo Girls obsession or the driving need to feel victimized by any occurrence of the letters m, e, and n placed together in the English language.
 
==See also==
*[[Lesbian Two Degrees of Separation]]
 
{{lezz}}
 
[[Category:Sex]]

Latest revision as of 17:26, 3 October 2015

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