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Adobe® Photoshop®: Difference between revisions

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:''Shoop redirects here. You may be looking for [[shoop da whoop]] or [[this looks shopped]].''
:''Shoop redirects here. You may be looking for [[shoop da whoop]] or [[this looks shopped]].''


{{pixplz}}
{{quote|you looked good...
 
... until your 30 day trial of photoshop expired|[[Typical]].}}
[[Image:photoshoop.jpg|thumb|left|IMA CHARGIN MAH DODGE TOOL]]
[[Image:photoshoop.jpg|thumb|left|IMA CHARGIN MAH DODGE TOOL]]
'''Adobe[[retard|®]] Photoshop[[retard|®]]''' is the [[internet]]'s [[winnar|premier photo editing software]]. Its very advanced features, [[Lies|present in no other image manipulation software]], allow you to perform complex tasks such as creating desktop wallpapers of your favorite Anime characters and [[Internet disease|airbrushing]] your [[webcam]] pictures to remove rolls of fat and pimples.
'''Adobe[[retard|®]] Photoshop[[retard|®]]''' is the [[internet]]'s [[winnar|premier photo editing software]]. Its very advanced features, [[Lies|present in no other image manipulation software]], allow you to perform complex tasks such as creating desktop wallpapers of your favorite Anime characters and [[Internet disease|airbrushing]] your [[webcam]] pictures to remove rolls of fat and pimples.
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If you wish to indicate that an image has been altered using the Adobe® Photoshop® program, the only acceptable way of saying so is as follows:
If you wish to indicate that an image has been altered using the Adobe® Photoshop® program, the only acceptable way of saying so is as follows:
[[this looks shopped|"This image seems as though it has been enhanced with Adobe® Photoshop® software."]] The term "photoshopped" is incorrect and a [http://www.adobe.com/misc/trade.html#section-4 violation of the Adobe® Photoshop® trademark].
[[this looks shopped|"This image seems as though it has been enhanced with Adobe® Photoshop® software."]] The term "photoshopped" is incorrect and a [https://www.adobe.com/legal/permissions/trademarks.html violation of the Adobe® Photoshop® trademark].
[[File:DodgetoolAP.jpg|thumb|right|Old AP UI]]
[[File:DodgetoolAP.jpg|thumb|right|Old AP UI]]


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==Photoshop® Contests==
==Photoshop® Contests==
[[Image:33z33pi.gif|right|thumb|Political Photoshopping]]
[[Image:Barack Obama making it rain.gif|right|thumb|<s>Political Photoshopping</s> Enhancement]]
Recent™ versions of Adobe® Photoshop© have approximately® [[over 9000|over 9000]] features™. Exactly two of them (Rotate Canvas and Auto Levels©) are actually useful for touching up your [[n00dz|vacation pictures]]. The only [[legitimate]] use® for the approximately 96,999,998© other features is to enter a "Photoshop® contest." Whoever spends hours® making the best fake photograph [[You Win the Prize|wins the prize]]©. Since the only advantage™ of photography over drawing is that it's faster and more accurate, this practice™ is unbelievably [[stupid]].  
Recent™ versions of Adobe® Photoshop© have approximately® [[over 9000|over 9000]] features™. Exactly two of them (Rotate Canvas and Auto Levels©) are actually useful for touching up your [[n00dz|vacation pictures]]. The only [[NORP|legitimate]] use® for the approximately 96,999,998© other features is to enter a "Photoshop® contest." Whoever spends hours® making the best fake photograph [[You Win the Prize|wins the prize]]©. Since the only advantage™ of photography over drawing is that it's faster and more accurate, this practice™ is unbelievably [[stupid]].  


Riding on the coattails of their program's massive success, the creators at Adobe® thought that it would be interesting to start up their own competition with the people who use Photoshop®. They sent out e-mails to the people that actually registered the program to explain the rules. The ten people with registered copies worked day and night. No one won the competition, many [[Baw|bawwed]] and Adobe® ran away from the competition ideas that they had.
Riding on the coattails of their program's massive success, the creators at Adobe® thought that it would be interesting to start up their own competition with the people who use Photoshop®. They sent out e-mails to the people that actually registered the program to explain the rules. The ten people with registered copies worked day and night. No one won the competition, many [[Baw|bawwed]] and Adobe® ran away from the competition ideas that they had.


==Asking for help...==
==Asking for help==
{{bigpic|NeverAskForHelpWithPhotoshop.jpg|frame|400|If you suck at Photoshop®, never on any occasion ask for help online.}}
<center>
{{scrollpic|NeverAskForHelpWithPhotoshop.jpg|850|400|If you suck at Photoshop®, never on any occasion ask for help online.}}
 
Our rendition:
 
[[File:Chrisandjacksonphotoshop.png]]
</center>


===Sites with Photoshop® Contests===
===Sites with Photoshop® Contests===
[[Image:photoshoop-cs4.png|thumb|right|IMA CHARGIN' MAH 3D TOOLS]]
[[Image:photoshoop-cs4.png|thumb|right|IMA CHARGIN' MAH 3D TOOLS]]
* [[Something Awful]]
*[[Something Awful]]
* [[Fark]]
*[[Fark]]
* [[Worth 1000]]
*[[Worth 1000]]
* Cracked.com
*Cracked.com
*[[4chan]]'s /b/ board
 
 
{{frame|<youtube>zmpt4T8Hyic</youtube>|margin=auto}}
 
 
==People who use Photoshop®== <!-- add some notable lolcows here, i cant be arsed to look any up -->


<center><youtube>zmpt4T8Hyic</youtube></center>
*Camwhores
*/b/-tards
*[[Loli|underage girls]]
*[[Pedophiles]]
*[[North Korea]]
*[[Furries]]
*[[weaboo|Weaboos]]
*You


==Free Alternatives to Photoshop®==
==Free Alternatives to Photoshop®==
Line 36: Line 56:


*The best [[butthurt|proprietary, patented, copyrighted, restricted, DRM-infected, homosexual]] alternative is [[Irfanview]].
*The best [[butthurt|proprietary, patented, copyrighted, restricted, DRM-infected, homosexual]] alternative is [[Irfanview]].
*If you are looking for an [[MS Paint]] on steroids, you'd probably like [https://www.getpaint.net/ Paint.NET]


==Gallery==
==Gallery==
<gallery>
{{cg|Photoshop® Gallery|photoshopgallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Suparho.jpg|What happens when a [[16-year-old girl]] has enough [[prostitute|hard-earned]] money to buy Adobe® Photoshop®.
Image:Suparho.jpg|What happens when a [[16-year-old girl]] has enough [[prostitute|hard-earned]] money to buy Adobe® Photoshop®.
Image:13yearoldwithphotoshop.jpg|What happens when a [[13-year-old boy]] pirates Adobe® Photoshop®.
Image:13yearoldwithphotoshop.jpg|What happens when a [[13-year-old boy]] [[BitTorrent|pirates]] Adobe® Photoshop®.
Image:LOLZ-1.png|A [[camwhore]] will often deny using Photoshop®.
Image:LOLZ-1.png|A [[camwhore]] will often deny using Photoshop®.
Image:Fgas-shoop.png| A [[Fat Girl Angle Shot|F.G.A.S.]] successfully masked with Photoshop® [[Less than three|<3 Luvzzz]] wishing that random google image was it's partner.
Image:4chan-photoshop.jpeg|What happens when these camwhores are too stupid to pirate software and go to [[B|/b/]] for help.
Image:Scandalous_tabloid_pic.jpg|An illegitimate instance of use for image enhancement of Adobe® Photoshop®.
Image:Scandalous_tabloid_pic.jpg|An illegitimate instance of use for image enhancement of Adobe® Photoshop®.
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Could Have Had A VX.png|Coulda Had A VX
File:Gaping Asshole Troll Shoop.png
File:Into The Van Shoop.png|An alternate image.
Image:Phail.jpg| [[Camwhore|Unacceptable]] [[Fail|usage]]
Image:Phail.jpg| [[Camwhore|Unacceptable]] [[Fail|usage]]
Image:Anime Guys Wallpaper by MewMidnight.jpg
Image:Anime Guys Wallpaper by MewMidnight.jpg
Line 50: Line 76:
Image:jbsg.jpg|The first thing [[12 year old girls|12 year old girls]] will do with Photoshop®.
Image:jbsg.jpg|The first thing [[12 year old girls|12 year old girls]] will do with Photoshop®.
Image:Photoshopfail.jpg|It's all a [[lie]].
Image:Photoshopfail.jpg|It's all a [[lie]].
Image:Awesomephotoshopjob.jpg|Way better at it than [[you]] are.
Image:Obama_gun.jpg|primates have yet to develop the brain functions necessary to operate firearms.
Image:LAURA SCOT CHIN.jpg|Natural
Image:zuckerberg_unicorn.png|Zuckerberg confirmed for [[Brony|ponyfag]].
Image:AliVanderhyden.jpg‎|Hiding STD's since 1990
Image:AliVanderhyden.jpg‎|Hiding STD's since 1990.
</gallery>
Image:Female_normal.jpg
Image:Badphotoshop.jpg|what [[You|a typical user]] will do with Photoshop®.
Image:Iran_missile_photoshop.jpg|A poorly-drawn missile launch, courtesy of [[Iran]].
Image:Turtle_photoshopped.jpg
Image:Hopingtomakeselflookbetterwithphotoshop.jpg
Image:Sonmanic_photoshop_party.jpg|what happens when the [[Retard|Retards]] discover Photoshop®.
Image:Lustifera_photoshop.jpg
Image:Lolphotoshop.jpg|The proper way to use Photoshop® is with women who are hot to begin with.
Image:Bitches_photoshop_template.jpg
Image:Photoshop_-_Fails_-_01.jpg
Image:Photoshop_-_Fails_-_02.jpg
Image:Photoshop_-_You_Know_What_To_Do.jpg
Image:Sharks_-_Fauxpics_-_07.jpg
Image:Apple_-_iPhone_-_Hitler.jpg
File:Photoshoop.PNG
File:Photos8 headset internet woman.jpg
File:Photoshop Fix.jpg
File:Photoshop-lessons.jpg
File:Photoshop-3d-design.jpg
File:Shopped1.jpg
File:Shoopdagirl.png
File:Failed attempt at photoshopped beauty.jpg
File:Adobe-photoshop-cs4.jpg
</gallery>|}}


==See Also==
==See Also==
[[File:JascGetOut.png|thumb|right|Some other company's inferior product]]
[[File:JascGetOut.png|thumb|right|Some other company's inferior product]]
* [[MS Paint]] - Adobe® Photoshop®'s leading rival software.
*[[MS Paint]] - Adobe® Photoshop®'s leading rival software.
* [[Gimp]] - Inefficient [[open source]] alternative.
*[[Gimp]] - Inefficient [[open source]] alternative.
* [[Irfanview]]
*[[Irfanview]]
* [[Nice try]]
*[[Nice try]]
* [[Meme Combining]] - A good use.
*[[Meme Combining]] - A good use.
* [[Garfield]] - A common target of Photoshop
*[[Garfield]] - A common target of Photoshop
* ''[[Dragon Ball AF]]'' - All content for this urban legend created with Adobe® Photoshop®.
*''[[Dragon Ball AF]]'' - All content for this urban legend created with Adobe® Photoshop®.
* [[Lotus Breast]] - Famous [[shock image]] made with Adobe® Photoshop®.
*[[Lotus Breast]] - Famous [[shock image]] made with Adobe® Photoshop®.
* [[Interpol Hunt SwirL-Face]]
*[[Interpol Hunt SwirL-Face]]
* [[This Looks Shopped]]
*[[This Looks Shopped]]
* [[IMMA CHARGIN MAH LAZER|Shoop da whoop]]
*[[IMMA CHARGIN MAH LAZER|Shoop da whoop]]


==External Links==
==External Links==
* [http://photoshopdisasters.blogspot.com/ PhotoshopDisasters] A blog dedicated to the most impressive Shoop's failures in marketing industry.
*'''{{archive|vbD5|PhotoshopDisasters}}''' A blog dedicated to the most impressive Shoop failures in the marketing industry.
{{digital media}}
{{digital media}}
{{softwarez}}
{{softwarez}}
[[Category: Softwarez]]
[[Category: Softwarez]]

Latest revision as of 07:21, 1 September 2023

Shoop redirects here. You may be looking for shoop da whoop or this looks shopped.
   
“ 		 
you looked good...

... until your 30 day trial of photoshop expired
 

„
  		 

—Typical.

IMA CHARGIN MAH DODGE TOOL

Adobe® Photoshop® is the internet's premier photo editing software. Its very advanced features, present in no other image manipulation software, allow you to perform complex tasks such as creating desktop wallpapers of your favorite Anime characters and airbrushing your webcam pictures to remove rolls of fat and pimples.

Nobody knows how much Adobe® Photoshop® costs or how Adobe® can still make money because nobody has ever actually purchased a copy of it before. Every copy of Adobe® Photoshop® in use today is actually the same pirated copy that has been in circulation for several years.

If you wish to indicate that an image has been altered using the Adobe® Photoshop® program, the only acceptable way of saying so is as follows: "This image seems as though it has been enhanced with Adobe® Photoshop® software." The term "photoshopped" is incorrect and a violation of the Adobe® Photoshop® trademark.

Old AP UI


Photoshop® Contests

Political Photoshopping Enhancement

Recent™ versions of Adobe® Photoshop© have approximately® over 9000 features™. Exactly two of them (Rotate Canvas and Auto Levels©) are actually useful for touching up your vacation pictures. The only legitimate use® for the approximately 96,999,998© other features is to enter a "Photoshop® contest." Whoever spends hours® making the best fake photograph wins the prize©. Since the only advantage™ of photography over drawing is that it's faster and more accurate, this practice™ is unbelievably stupid.

Riding on the coattails of their program's massive success, the creators at Adobe® thought that it would be interesting to start up their own competition with the people who use Photoshop®. They sent out e-mails to the people that actually registered the program to explain the rules. The ten people with registered copies worked day and night. No one won the competition, many bawwed and Adobe® ran away from the competition ideas that they had.

Asking for help

Use scrollbar to see the full image

If you suck at Photoshop®, never on any occasion ask for help online.


Our rendition:

Sites with Photoshop® Contests

IMA CHARGIN' MAH 3D TOOLS



People who use Photoshop®

Free Alternatives to Photoshop®

Gallery

Photoshop® Gallery About missing Pics
  • What happens when a 16-year-old girl has enough hard-earned money to buy Adobe® Photoshop®.
    What happens when a 16-year-old girl has enough hard-earned money to buy Adobe® Photoshop®.
  • What happens when a 13-year-old boy pirates Adobe® Photoshop®.
    What happens when a 13-year-old boy pirates Adobe® Photoshop®.
  • A camwhore will often deny using Photoshop®.
    A camwhore will often deny using Photoshop®.
  • What happens when these camwhores are too stupid to pirate software and go to /b/ for help.
    What happens when these camwhores are too stupid to pirate software and go to /b/ for help.
  • An illegitimate instance of use for image enhancement of Adobe® Photoshop®.
    An illegitimate instance of use for image enhancement of Adobe® Photoshop®.
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]
  • Coulda Had A VX
    Coulda Had A VX
  • An alternate image.
    An alternate image.
  • Unacceptable usage
    Unacceptable usage
  • This is the first thing all teenage girls do when they get Photoshop®.
    This is the first thing all teenage girls do when they get Photoshop®.
  • The first thing 12 year old girls will do with Photoshop®.
    The first thing 12 year old girls will do with Photoshop®.
  • It's all a lie.
    It's all a lie.
  • primates have yet to develop the brain functions necessary to operate firearms.
    primates have yet to develop the brain functions necessary to operate firearms.
  • Zuckerberg confirmed for ponyfag.
    Zuckerberg confirmed for ponyfag.
  • Hiding STD's since 1990.
    Hiding STD's since 1990.
  • what a typical user will do with Photoshop®.
    what a typical user will do with Photoshop®.
  • A poorly-drawn missile launch, courtesy of Iran.
    A poorly-drawn missile launch, courtesy of Iran.
  • what happens when the Retards discover Photoshop®.
    what happens when the Retards discover Photoshop®.
  • The proper way to use Photoshop® is with women who are hot to begin with.
    The proper way to use Photoshop® is with women who are hot to begin with.

See Also

Some other company's inferior product

External Links

  • PhotoshopDisasters A blog dedicated to the most impressive Shoop failures in the marketing industry.
Adobe® Photoshop®

is part of a series on
Digital Media

Adobe® Photoshop® • Android • BlackBerry • Blu-ray • Compact Disc • DesuRadio • DRM • Fairphone • FLAC • Fraps • Gimp • Internet DVD • K-LULZ • Irfanview • iPhone • iPod • iTunes • L0de • Microsoft Surface • Mixtapes • MKV • MP3 • MS Paint • Pivot Stickfigure Animator • Quicktime • RealPlayer • Reason • Sony Vegas • VLC Media Player • Windows Movie Maker • Windows Media Player • WMV • Zune

Adobe® Photoshop® is part of a series on

Softwarez

Visit the Softwarez Portal for complete coverage.

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