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Adobe® Photoshop®: Difference between revisions
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:''Shoop redirects here. You may be looking for [[shoop da whoop]] or [[this looks shopped]].'' | :''Shoop redirects here. You may be looking for [[shoop da whoop]] or [[this looks shopped]].'' | ||
{{ | {{quote|you looked good... | ||
... until your 30 day trial of photoshop expired|[[Typical]].}} | |||
... until your 30 day trial of photoshop expired | |||
[[Image:photoshoop.jpg|thumb|left|IMA CHARGIN MAH DODGE TOOL]] | [[Image:photoshoop.jpg|thumb|left|IMA CHARGIN MAH DODGE TOOL]] | ||
'''Adobe[[retard|®]] Photoshop[[retard|®]]''' is the [[internet]]'s [[winnar|premier photo editing software]]. Its very advanced features, [[Lies|present in no other image manipulation software]], allow you to perform complex tasks such as creating desktop wallpapers of your favorite Anime characters and [[Internet disease|airbrushing]] your [[webcam]] pictures to remove rolls of fat and pimples. | '''Adobe[[retard|®]] Photoshop[[retard|®]]''' is the [[internet]]'s [[winnar|premier photo editing software]]. Its very advanced features, [[Lies|present in no other image manipulation software]], allow you to perform complex tasks such as creating desktop wallpapers of your favorite Anime characters and [[Internet disease|airbrushing]] your [[webcam]] pictures to remove rolls of fat and pimples. | ||
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If you wish to indicate that an image has been altered using the Adobe® Photoshop® program, the only acceptable way of saying so is as follows: | If you wish to indicate that an image has been altered using the Adobe® Photoshop® program, the only acceptable way of saying so is as follows: | ||
[[this looks shopped|"This image seems as though it has been enhanced with Adobe® Photoshop® software."]] The term "photoshopped" is incorrect and a [ | [[this looks shopped|"This image seems as though it has been enhanced with Adobe® Photoshop® software."]] The term "photoshopped" is incorrect and a [https://www.adobe.com/legal/permissions/trademarks.html violation of the Adobe® Photoshop® trademark]. | ||
[[File:DodgetoolAP.jpg|thumb|right|Old AP UI]] | [[File:DodgetoolAP.jpg|thumb|right|Old AP UI]] | ||
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==Photoshop® Contests== | ==Photoshop® Contests== | ||
[[Image: | [[Image:Barack Obama making it rain.gif|right|thumb|<s>Political Photoshopping</s> Enhancement]] | ||
Recent™ versions of Adobe® Photoshop© have approximately® [[over 9000|over 9000]] features™. Exactly two of them (Rotate Canvas and Auto Levels©) are actually useful for touching up your [[n00dz|vacation pictures]]. The only [[NORP|legitimate]] use® for the approximately 96,999,998© other features is to enter a "Photoshop® contest." Whoever spends hours® making the best fake photograph [[You Win the Prize|wins the prize]]©. Since the only advantage™ of photography over drawing is that it's faster and more accurate, this practice™ is unbelievably [[stupid]]. | Recent™ versions of Adobe® Photoshop© have approximately® [[over 9000|over 9000]] features™. Exactly two of them (Rotate Canvas and Auto Levels©) are actually useful for touching up your [[n00dz|vacation pictures]]. The only [[NORP|legitimate]] use® for the approximately 96,999,998© other features is to enter a "Photoshop® contest." Whoever spends hours® making the best fake photograph [[You Win the Prize|wins the prize]]©. Since the only advantage™ of photography over drawing is that it's faster and more accurate, this practice™ is unbelievably [[stupid]]. | ||
Riding on the coattails of their program's massive success, the creators at Adobe® thought that it would be interesting to start up their own competition with the people who use Photoshop®. They sent out e-mails to the people that actually registered the program to explain the rules. The ten people with registered copies worked day and night. No one won the competition, many [[Baw|bawwed]] and Adobe® ran away from the competition ideas that they had. | Riding on the coattails of their program's massive success, the creators at Adobe® thought that it would be interesting to start up their own competition with the people who use Photoshop®. They sent out e-mails to the people that actually registered the program to explain the rules. The ten people with registered copies worked day and night. No one won the competition, many [[Baw|bawwed]] and Adobe® ran away from the competition ideas that they had. | ||
==Asking for help | ==Asking for help== | ||
{{ | <center> | ||
{{scrollpic|NeverAskForHelpWithPhotoshop.jpg|850|400|If you suck at Photoshop®, never on any occasion ask for help online.}} | |||
Our rendition: | |||
[[File:Chrisandjacksonphotoshop.png]] | |||
</center> | |||
===Sites with Photoshop® Contests=== | ===Sites with Photoshop® Contests=== | ||
[[Image:photoshoop-cs4.png|thumb|right|IMA CHARGIN' MAH 3D TOOLS]] | [[Image:photoshoop-cs4.png|thumb|right|IMA CHARGIN' MAH 3D TOOLS]] | ||
* [[Something Awful]] | *[[Something Awful]] | ||
* [[Fark]] | *[[Fark]] | ||
* [[Worth 1000]] | *[[Worth 1000]] | ||
* Cracked.com | *Cracked.com | ||
*[[4chan]]'s /b/ board | |||
{{frame|<youtube>zmpt4T8Hyic</youtube>|margin=auto}} | |||
==People who use Photoshop®== <!-- add some notable lolcows here, i cant be arsed to look any up --> | |||
*Camwhores | |||
*/b/-tards | |||
*[[Loli|underage girls]] | |||
*[[Pedophiles]] | |||
*[[North Korea]] | |||
*[[Furries]] | |||
*[[weaboo|Weaboos]] | |||
*You | |||
==Free Alternatives to Photoshop®== | ==Free Alternatives to Photoshop®== | ||
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*The best [[butthurt|proprietary, patented, copyrighted, restricted, DRM-infected, homosexual]] alternative is [[Irfanview]]. | *The best [[butthurt|proprietary, patented, copyrighted, restricted, DRM-infected, homosexual]] alternative is [[Irfanview]]. | ||
*If you are looking for an [[MS Paint]] on steroids, you'd probably like [https://www.getpaint.net/ Paint.NET] | |||
==Gallery== | ==Gallery== | ||
<gallery> | {{cg|Photoshop® Gallery|photoshopgallery|center|<gallery perrow="5"> | ||
Image:Suparho.jpg|What happens when a [[16-year-old girl]] has enough [[prostitute|hard-earned]] money to buy Adobe® Photoshop®. | Image:Suparho.jpg|What happens when a [[16-year-old girl]] has enough [[prostitute|hard-earned]] money to buy Adobe® Photoshop®. | ||
Image:13yearoldwithphotoshop.jpg|What happens when a [[13-year-old boy]] pirates Adobe® Photoshop®. | Image:13yearoldwithphotoshop.jpg|What happens when a [[13-year-old boy]] [[BitTorrent|pirates]] Adobe® Photoshop®. | ||
Image:LOLZ-1.png|A [[camwhore]] will often deny using Photoshop®. | Image:LOLZ-1.png|A [[camwhore]] will often deny using Photoshop®. | ||
Image: | Image:4chan-photoshop.jpeg|What happens when these camwhores are too stupid to pirate software and go to [[B|/b/]] for help. | ||
Image:Scandalous_tabloid_pic.jpg|An illegitimate instance of use for image enhancement of Adobe® Photoshop®. | Image:Scandalous_tabloid_pic.jpg|An illegitimate instance of use for image enhancement of Adobe® Photoshop®. | ||
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5"> | |||
File:Could Have Had A VX.png|Coulda Had A VX | |||
File:Gaping Asshole Troll Shoop.png | |||
File:Into The Van Shoop.png|An alternate image. | |||
Image:Phail.jpg| [[Camwhore|Unacceptable]] [[Fail|usage]] | Image:Phail.jpg| [[Camwhore|Unacceptable]] [[Fail|usage]] | ||
Image:Anime Guys Wallpaper by MewMidnight.jpg | Image:Anime Guys Wallpaper by MewMidnight.jpg | ||
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Image:jbsg.jpg|The first thing [[12 year old girls|12 year old girls]] will do with Photoshop®. | Image:jbsg.jpg|The first thing [[12 year old girls|12 year old girls]] will do with Photoshop®. | ||
Image:Photoshopfail.jpg|It's all a [[lie]]. | Image:Photoshopfail.jpg|It's all a [[lie]]. | ||
Image: | Image:Obama_gun.jpg|primates have yet to develop the brain functions necessary to operate firearms. | ||
Image: | Image:zuckerberg_unicorn.png|Zuckerberg confirmed for [[Brony|ponyfag]]. | ||
Image:AliVanderhyden.jpg|Hiding STD's since 1990 | Image:AliVanderhyden.jpg|Hiding STD's since 1990. | ||
</gallery> | Image:Female_normal.jpg | ||
Image:Badphotoshop.jpg|what [[You|a typical user]] will do with Photoshop®. | |||
Image:Iran_missile_photoshop.jpg|A poorly-drawn missile launch, courtesy of [[Iran]]. | |||
Image:Turtle_photoshopped.jpg | |||
Image:Hopingtomakeselflookbetterwithphotoshop.jpg | |||
Image:Sonmanic_photoshop_party.jpg|what happens when the [[Retard|Retards]] discover Photoshop®. | |||
Image:Lustifera_photoshop.jpg | |||
Image:Lolphotoshop.jpg|The proper way to use Photoshop® is with women who are hot to begin with. | |||
Image:Bitches_photoshop_template.jpg | |||
Image:Photoshop_-_Fails_-_01.jpg | |||
Image:Photoshop_-_Fails_-_02.jpg | |||
Image:Photoshop_-_You_Know_What_To_Do.jpg | |||
Image:Sharks_-_Fauxpics_-_07.jpg | |||
Image:Apple_-_iPhone_-_Hitler.jpg | |||
File:Photoshoop.PNG | |||
File:Photos8 headset internet woman.jpg | |||
File:Photoshop Fix.jpg | |||
File:Photoshop-lessons.jpg | |||
File:Photoshop-3d-design.jpg | |||
File:Shopped1.jpg | |||
File:Shoopdagirl.png | |||
File:Failed attempt at photoshopped beauty.jpg | |||
File:Adobe-photoshop-cs4.jpg | |||
</gallery>|}} | |||
==See Also== | ==See Also== | ||
[[File:JascGetOut.png|thumb|right|Some other company's inferior product]] | [[File:JascGetOut.png|thumb|right|Some other company's inferior product]] | ||
* [[MS Paint]] - Adobe® Photoshop®'s leading rival software. | *[[MS Paint]] - Adobe® Photoshop®'s leading rival software. | ||
* [[Gimp]] - Inefficient [[open source]] alternative. | *[[Gimp]] - Inefficient [[open source]] alternative. | ||
* [[Irfanview]] | *[[Irfanview]] | ||
* [[Nice try]] | *[[Nice try]] | ||
* [[Meme Combining]] - A good use. | *[[Meme Combining]] - A good use. | ||
* [[Garfield]] - A common target of Photoshop | *[[Garfield]] - A common target of Photoshop | ||
* ''[[Dragon Ball AF]]'' - All content for this urban legend created with Adobe® Photoshop®. | *''[[Dragon Ball AF]]'' - All content for this urban legend created with Adobe® Photoshop®. | ||
* [[Lotus Breast]] - Famous [[shock image]] made with Adobe® Photoshop®. | *[[Lotus Breast]] - Famous [[shock image]] made with Adobe® Photoshop®. | ||
* [[Interpol Hunt SwirL-Face]] | *[[Interpol Hunt SwirL-Face]] | ||
* [[This Looks Shopped]] | *[[This Looks Shopped]] | ||
* [[IMMA CHARGIN MAH LAZER|Shoop da whoop]] | *[[IMMA CHARGIN MAH LAZER|Shoop da whoop]] | ||
==External Links== | ==External Links== | ||
* | *'''{{archive|vbD5|PhotoshopDisasters}}''' A blog dedicated to the most impressive Shoop failures in the marketing industry. | ||
{{digital media}} | {{digital media}} | ||
{{softwarez}} | {{softwarez}} | ||
[[Category: Softwarez]] | [[Category: Softwarez]] |
Latest revision as of 07:21, 1 September 2023
- Shoop redirects here. You may be looking for shoop da whoop or this looks shopped.
—Typical. |
Adobe® Photoshop® is the internet's premier photo editing software. Its very advanced features, present in no other image manipulation software, allow you to perform complex tasks such as creating desktop wallpapers of your favorite Anime characters and airbrushing your webcam pictures to remove rolls of fat and pimples.
Nobody knows how much Adobe® Photoshop® costs or how Adobe® can still make money because nobody has ever actually purchased a copy of it before. Every copy of Adobe® Photoshop® in use today is actually the same pirated copy that has been in circulation for several years.
If you wish to indicate that an image has been altered using the Adobe® Photoshop® program, the only acceptable way of saying so is as follows: "This image seems as though it has been enhanced with Adobe® Photoshop® software." The term "photoshopped" is incorrect and a violation of the Adobe® Photoshop® trademark.
Photoshop® Contests
Recent™ versions of Adobe® Photoshop© have approximately® over 9000 features™. Exactly two of them (Rotate Canvas and Auto Levels©) are actually useful for touching up your vacation pictures. The only legitimate use® for the approximately 96,999,998© other features is to enter a "Photoshop® contest." Whoever spends hours® making the best fake photograph wins the prize©. Since the only advantage™ of photography over drawing is that it's faster and more accurate, this practice™ is unbelievably stupid.
Riding on the coattails of their program's massive success, the creators at Adobe® thought that it would be interesting to start up their own competition with the people who use Photoshop®. They sent out e-mails to the people that actually registered the program to explain the rules. The ten people with registered copies worked day and night. No one won the competition, many bawwed and Adobe® ran away from the competition ideas that they had.
Asking for help
Use scrollbar to see the full image
Our rendition:
Sites with Photoshop® Contests
- Something Awful
- Fark
- Worth 1000
- Cracked.com
- 4chan's /b/ board
People who use Photoshop®
- Camwhores
- /b/-tards
- underage girls
- Pedophiles
- North Korea
- Furries
- Weaboos
- You
Free Alternatives to Photoshop®
- The best open sores alternative to Photoshop® is The PIMP.
- The best proprietary, patented, copyrighted, restricted, DRM-infected, homosexual alternative is Irfanview.
Gallery
-
What happens when a 16-year-old girl has enough hard-earned money to buy Adobe® Photoshop®.
-
What happens when a 13-year-old boy pirates Adobe® Photoshop®.
-
A camwhore will often deny using Photoshop®.
-
What happens when these camwhores are too stupid to pirate software and go to /b/ for help.
-
An illegitimate instance of use for image enhancement of Adobe® Photoshop®.
-
Coulda Had A VX
-
An alternate image.
-
This is the first thing all teenage girls do when they get Photoshop®.
-
The first thing 12 year old girls will do with Photoshop®.
-
It's all a lie.
-
primates have yet to develop the brain functions necessary to operate firearms.
-
Zuckerberg confirmed for ponyfag.
-
Hiding STD's since 1990.
-
what a typical user will do with Photoshop®.
-
A poorly-drawn missile launch, courtesy of Iran.
-
what happens when the Retards discover Photoshop®.
-
The proper way to use Photoshop® is with women who are hot to begin with.
See Also
- MS Paint - Adobe® Photoshop®'s leading rival software.
- Gimp - Inefficient open source alternative.
- Irfanview
- Nice try
- Meme Combining - A good use.
- Garfield - A common target of Photoshop
- Dragon Ball AF - All content for this urban legend created with Adobe® Photoshop®.
- Lotus Breast - Famous shock image made with Adobe® Photoshop®.
- Interpol Hunt SwirL-Face
- This Looks Shopped
- Shoop da whoop
External Links
- PhotoshopDisasters A blog dedicated to the most impressive Shoop failures in the marketing industry.
Adobe® Photoshop® Digital Media
|
Adobe® Photoshop® • Android • BlackBerry • Blu-ray • Compact Disc • DesuRadio • DRM • Fairphone • FLAC • Fraps • Gimp • Internet DVD • K-LULZ • Irfanview • iPhone • iPod • iTunes • L0de • Microsoft Surface • Mixtapes • MKV • MP3 • MS Paint • Pivot Stickfigure Animator • Quicktime • RealPlayer • Reason • Sony Vegas • VLC Media Player • Windows Movie Maker • Windows Media Player • WMV • Zune |
Adobe® Photoshop® is part of a series on Visit the Softwarez Portal for complete coverage. |