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Doc James: Difference between revisions

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imported>CurtainMan
James Heilman wishes his dick could do this. Because it can not, he wants to convince others that it is better that way.
imported>CurtainMan
James Heilman wishes his dick could do this. Because it can not, he wants to convince others that it is better that way.
 
(No difference)

Latest revision as of 14:16, 19 November 2023

Note: this is an article about an Encyclopedia Dramatica user. For more information, please see the appropriate user page. To leave this user a message, please visit their talk page.
Dr. Jellyfinger

link=https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Doc James James Doc James‎ (AKA User:Jmh649), is the pseudonym of Dr. James Heilman of Moose Jaw, Canada. A former shemale model he, is currently employed photographing indigent patients in the emergency room in Moose Jaw. He also is a circumphile and circumcision promoter, an Administrator and resident medical expert on Wikipedia, a scary Wikidragon, and an hero.

In 2009 Doc James posted the Rohrschach inkblots on Wikipedia, he felt that according to his expertise witholding this information would be like the "Chinese government's censorship of the Tiananmen Square Massacre. ..."[1]. He was on television and in the news all over the world which swelled his head and helped compensate for his feelings of inadequacy due to his small penis.

When not hard at work taking pictures of men's testicles [2], Doc James likes to relax by playing with his own balls. According to Doc [3] "one of my favorite activities, juggling five balls". WTF?.

On Wikipedia, Heilman is one of the leading promoters of cutting off the foremost part of the male reproductive organ. As a man with a foreskinless mushroom-shaped penis, he tries to keep inconvenient realities about circumcision out of Wikipedia since they represent a threat to his sense of completeness.

Psssst! Quick! Sweep it under the rug before anyone notices![1]

He also promotes the fraudulent studies by his circumphile buddy Brian J. Morris while trying to keep Morris' name out of the article so people don't begin to notice.[1]

James Heilman wishes his dick could do this. Because it can not, he wants to convince others that it is better that way.

His teenage years

Let's just say Heilman wasn't successful with girls.

James Heilman gets laughed at by three girls

Doc James' Dickisms

Doc James is also a Clinical Assistant Professor at the University of Saskatchewan and a Clinical Instructor at the University of British Columbia. Where he utilizes his amazing mastery of the English language to teach the next generation of doctors.

  • 20:44, 15 October 2010 (diff | hist) Cardiopulmonary resuscitation ‎ (advocated do not challenge stuff evidence challenges stuff)[4]
  • I do not know have [sic] an image of a dead person glamorizes suicide. Doc James (talk · contribs · email) 18:16, 26 July 2010 (UTC)[5]
  • The last change you made I find exceptable[4]. Doc James (talk · contribs · email) 13:53, 29 September 2010 (UTC)[6]
  • Give the details about research in a treatment section for stuff that is not treatments is miss leading. Doc James (talk · contribs · email) 06:43, 23 September 2010 (UTC)[7]
  • Wikipedia is in the public domain which means it belongs to all of use. Help protect and expand this attempt at the sum of all human knowledge.[8]
  • ...(expert opinion) as I have stated previously in no way justifies the senzorship of images on wikipedia for medical reasons. Cheers --Doc James (talk · contribs · email) 01:08, 25 June 2009 (UTC)[9]


Doc James Awards

For his outstanding contributions to assraping the "Sum of all human knowledge" Doc has been received many awards from his fellow Wikipedians, among them:

  • The Defender of the Wiki Barnstar (three of these, WOW)
  • The Special Barnstar
The Barnstar of Diligence
For your help on numerous articles undergoing good or featured article review and for spending so much time striving to keep balance on the Ass Rape articles despite people trying very hard to do otherwise. Literaturegeek | T@1k? 00:13, 20 May 2009 (UTC)
The Fat Whore Award
Even though you are an Fugly four-eyed attention whore, you act just like a Fat Whore...Like me, I a fat whore, LOL. SandyGeorgia (Talk) 01:51, 20 October 2010 (UTC)


Wikimedia Canada

Not content to contribute to the sum of all human knowledge on Wikipedia, our hero is also actively seeking to create "Wikimedia Canada", I am attempting to finish the process of creating Wikimedia Canada. I have a freind [sic] who is a corporate lawyer who has expressed interest in joining us.[10]

Hobbies

When not running a modeling agency out of the Five Hills Health Region E.R. by photographing ignorant poor patients and uploading their pictures to Teh Internets[11], juggling his balls or assraping the "sum of all human knowledge", Doc James likes to ride the local Mantrain and participate in friendly get togethers with fellow Wikipedians.

Mangering da Engrish

  • Regular Engrish:

Cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) is an emergency procedure to temporarily sustain the life of a person in cardiac arrest or respiratory arrest.[1] CPR is performed both in hospitals and in pre-hospital settings[12]

  • Doc James Engrish:

Cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) is an emergency procedure which is attempted to return life to a person in cardiac arrest or respiratory arrest.[1] It may be attempted both in and outside of a hospital.[13]

  • (cur | prev) 19:34, 24 October 2010 Jmh649 (talk | contribs) (43,150 bytes) (better wording) (undo)

Election and ejection from the WMF board

Doc James is something of a hero among Wikipedos, mostly for keeping their medical articles as free from fact as possible. So when he ran for the board of trustees of the Wikimedia Foundation, he won handily. This victory would prove to be short lived, however, as the board voted to summarily eject him from the board at his very first board meeting. There are no details about this embarrassing episode yet, although it has been speculated that Heilman declined to suck Jimbo's ass at his very first meeting. He has remained silent for the time being and we here at Encyclopedia Dramatica encourage him to anonymously provide details here.

External link

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