User:Sm32r/MC Spitfire

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Behold, this is what happens when you think that those sexy girls you found on MSN or Yahoo are real girls that want to fuck you.

The Story

In early 2009, one of the users on Drum N Bass Arena forums got trolled hard. The user in question was a young pasty faced chav lad from Portsmouth, UK, who had dreams of rapping on stage at dnb raves as an MC.
These dreams were shattered when MC Spitfire was trolled over MSN and screenshots were posted online to the shitfest britfag forum Drum n Bass Arena of him fingering his dirty anus hole.

DNBA, Dogs On Acid, and all the other dnb forums went crazy with delight and the young faggot had all his bookings cancelled and went into hiding.
The following message appeared on his facebook fanpage shortly after the scandal exploded on the forums:

Mike Ripraw Deacon: mate im sorry to tell you on facebook but i have no other way of gettin hold of u......... i've been asked by sumeone above me to remove you from the bill on the coming rollin rave night due to a recent event. sorry mate. get in touch before the next one and il c wot i can do

His face was then shooped onto various pictures for the hilarity of forum members. This online hilarity even spawned a downloadable mp3 track featuring many of the DNBA forum members rapping, which still brings many lulz when posted today. Such was the online furour that the story was even covered by the BBC and the Telegraph who referred to the incident as a "forum massacre". Liam (MC Spitfire) had apparently angered a couple of creative trolls when insinuating that he'd had sex with one of their significant others in the missionary position for the purpose of procreation. The original poster of the screenshots "Mr Justice" posted the following explanation in the main DNBA thread:

ye it was girl related, a long time ago but i swore revenge....and the main fact i did it was to bring to the public attention how u dnt know what a 17 / 18 yr old drum n bass mc is thinking. For all of those that did b2b mcin with him and thought the mic smelt a bit off, you now know why

Apparently, as of 2012, Liam, (Born 13 December) is trying to make a comeback in the field of HipHop. He recently posted his shitty music videos to Facebook and thinks that everyone just forgot about his little episode, and is currently in a relationship with chubby slag named Chanice Barttelot. Troll him by asking about his sticky bum finger or asking his missus if he takes it in the bum. He is trying to sell his shitty album and clothing label (named "Out Da Booth"). Lolwut? He also hosts a student event, not ironically named "BTM HVY". Identified on his current Facebook (linked below), and confirmed for his awful "Spitfire" and "Annie Mac" tattoos, (not to mention the fact that there can only be one person called Liam Spitfire from Portsmouth), Liam seems to be continuing his quest for stardom, which is a shame because as soon as anyone realises who he is, he will forever be the boy with the shitty finger on the quest for starfish. This continues to give lulz to the dnb communities and several people still carry Liam's face as their sigs in the forums. This online drama will forever be remembered as a golden day in DNBA history even though the faggot mods deleted the original thread. Interestingly, the Dogs on Acid thread still exists and contains this lovely comment by Spitfire himself:

After the faggot mods at DNBA deleted the original thread, there was fury from the users and they did their best to preserve the original screen caps and shoops. One user contacted KrisisDnB (an internet based radio station that Spitfire performed on) and recieved this reply:

weve not spoke to him since it was posted on the krisisdnb forum on weds as his phone has clearly been swamped and that was only cos he spotted it and texted me to ask to remove it which we did as quick as we could. its entirely up to him how he deals with it but it will clearly take some time (maybe never) to shake it off (no pun intended). even tho not many people wud let themselves get in this situation in the first place but he has got an opportunity to make some money from it as a lot of promoters will know they will ram a venue out over this. its whether spitfire would want to put himself in that position and face people

Video of him doing his "music"

WARNING - THIS IS SHIT

Mod X sums up the story

ORIGINAL: Mod X

Guy one had a chick, guy two (Spitfire) tried to bang that chick and in the process slated guy one, guy two then went around bragging that he had banged guy one's chick.
Guy one then pretended to be a chick on MSN and convinced guy two to masturbate on camera, guy two did this and also stuck his finger up his arse.
Pictures then surface of guy two with cock in hand and finger up arse.
On Page 3 of thread is said picture.
Negus then knocked together a piss take tune of the situation.
Happyfeet being the the mong that she is then tried to hijack the thread with nonsensical drivel about mixdowns like Negus ever had any intention of putting said tune out .
Summary being: MC Spitfire from Portsmouth now has pictures of himself wanking with his finger up his arse all over DNBA because he wronged someone who clearly has some creative revenge capabilities.
Par of the highest order.

Screenshots of the convo =

Photobucket 1 Photobucket 2

Transcript of the MSN Conversation via Marley608

Emma - canny wait for zante in summer w00p xxxx says: touch urself
Emma - canny wait for zante in summer w00p xxxx says: i am
MC SPITFIRE /portsmouth , get ya rowdy rowdy rowdy -on the mina mica live in Southsea southsea... says: i ma
J babe says: I want to see you deep inside Emma
MC SPITFIRE /portsmouth , get ya rowdy rowdy rowdy -on the mina mica live in Southsea southsea... says: mmmmmm carry on
Emma - canny wait for zante in summer w00p xxxx says: and then i wnna slap ur dick off my tongue
Emma - canny wait for zante in summer w00p xxxx says: n look up at u
Emma - canny wait for zante in summer w00p xxxx says: and finger myself
MC SPITFIRE /portsmouth , get ya rowdy rowdy rowdy -on the mina mica live in Southsea southsea... says: hmmm carry on im gtn hard tinkn bw tplayin iwth both ur pussy's
MC SPITFIRE /portsmouth , get ya rowdy rowdy rowdy -on the mina mica live in Southsea southsea... says: i wna yu to kneel dwn in front of me as i storke my long hard cock
MC SPITFIRE /portsmouth , get ya rowdy rowdy rowdy -on the mina mica live in Southsea southsea... says: i wna yu to kneel dwn in front of me as i storke my long hard cock
MC SPITFIRE /portsmouth , get ya rowdy rowdy rowdy -on the mina mica live in Southsea southsea... says: hmmmm my cock is so hard
Emma - canny wait for zante in summer w00p xxxx says: make it squirt over our faces
Emma - canny wait for zante in summer w00p xxxx says: how long is that thing baby im so scared
MC SPITFIRE /portsmouth , get ya rowdy rowdy rowdy -on the mina mica live in Southsea southsea... says: i wnt yu ot grab my cock and pull mje towards u and suck on oni t while tyhe other grabs my bum
J babe says: You touchin yourself spit?
MC SPITFIRE /portsmouth , get ya rowdy rowdy rowdy -on the mina mica live in Southsea southsea... says: oh yes
MC SPITFIRE /portsmouth , get ya rowdy rowdy rowdy -on the mina mica live in Southsea southsea... says: i wnt yu to to abuse me rle take control hehe
Emma - canny wait for zante in summer w00p xxxx says: ur a bad bad boy mr spitfire
Emma - canny wait for zante in summer w00p xxxx says: u need to b punished
MC SPITFIRE /portsmouth , get ya rowdy rowdy rowdy -on the mina mica live in Southsea southsea... says: grab my cock whilst ur graB MY bum
rowdy rowdy rowdy -on the mina mica live in Southsea southsea... says: lay me dwn whilst i lick one of urs wet pussys and the others play wit my wit me hard n fast mm rubin all over my cock and my bum
Emma - canny wait for zante in summer w00p xxxx says: can i finger it
MC SPITFIRE /portsmouth , get ya rowdy rowdy rowdy -on the mina mica live in Southsea southsea... says:
mmmmm yes

Moar Spitfire

After a little digging, forum members discovered that MC Spitfire (or Liam pokey bum wank to his friends) had once met Annie Mac (famous UK DJ) and had her name tatooed on his chest. Sauce: https://twitpic.com/47fle
More hilarity ensued.
Urban Dictionary still displays the term "Doing a Spitfire" as:

To perform the sexual act upon yourself of self prostate massaging, live on webcam to someone who you don't know.
Liam had his life ruined by "Doing a Spitfire" by going on MSN to a load of guys he thought were girls and fingered his bot bot, which was then PrtSc and uploaded onto a dnb forum! "Ah f*ck, i've been Spitfired"

It looks like Spitfire is making a "cumback". Removing himself from the dnb scene and starting up in hiphop, yet failing to change his name. What a tool. Listen to his shitty tracks here: http://spitfireukofficial.bandcamp.com

Gallery

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Quotes

	“	When I say biddy biddy bum, you say finger	„
	—STIMPY

Previous Quote | Next Quote

Spitfire Bel-Air

On the south coast, Portsmouth born and raised
Myspace, where I spent most of my days
Chilling out, maxing, relaxing all fun
With my finger half the way up my bum
When a couple of guys who were up to no good
Chatting on msn as a girl going to zante woop!
Showed my cock and arse on screen and mum said im gay
Now I got a 19 page thread on dnba

User generated lyrics in tribute to MC Shitfire

I spit fire, but my index is never coming outty
here tell these people something they dont know about me

MC Spitfire, lyrical genius.
Finger up my bum, hand wrapped round my penis.
I was just fingering my bum, trying to get nudes
I didn't know i was on webcam to a load of dudes.

Spitfire about to roll on
now i bust 2 bars like i'm exploring my colon
ram it up there, this is how i roll
want you to to abuse me, really take control
get ya rowdy rowdy rowdy,
hang on, this cams a bit bait
oh shit you caught me,
massaging my prostate

My name is mc spitfire n lyrically I'm dappa,
But but i can't keep my finga out my muthafukinin crappa.
caught on camera, epic fail
chunks of poo under my fingernail
I spit lyrics like their dynamite
hold on let me shine a light
right inside my shit hole where my fingers like to play at night

Getting rinsed on the web is my game,
Even Jupiter can’t hide my shame.
I inserted a digit and didn’t even fidget,
Now I think I’m gonna change my name.

Watch the ride
I stick my stinky index finger inside
slip a hand around my cock just like i'm grippin' a mic
But i ain't bussin bars
i'm literally busting my arse
When it comes to bludgeoning anus i'm in a whole different class.

When my finger penetrates, I feel a pooey sensation
Gettin' closer to bowel, in a tight situation now
Take these words go home and think it through, or the next rhyme I write might stink of poo

I keep missing bookings
still at home when the shows on
too busy exploring the contours of my colon
You think i'm only one digit deep when i get live in the session?
I wont stop until i reach my small intestine.

MC STAMINA CONTRIBUTES

I reckon Spitfire can spit flame - that's the prick's name
Lyrically a bit tame but kinda big in the shit game
Well up for chatting to chicks probing his gaping anus
But yo, the scat in these pics will go and make him famous
His baiter's nameless, preserving his anonymity
But blatant shameless in merking a young silly MC
The thing that's killing me is how the vague prospects
Of hot sex made him self-par so willingly!
A story so funny I had to go an tell a friend
Time is a healer but blatantly this will never mend
Don't be reckless up on MSN
I reckon I might be triple-checking every message I ever send
All the fun that we've had from one screen grab
Liam: forget MCing, consider rehab
Deaded your own career, something to think about
What's your next move? Think fast - and get you finger out!

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