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User:IncubatorKyubey/Randy Savage
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Last Thursday, Randy "Macho-Man" Savage spectacularly quit IRL by swerving his Jeep into a tree and snapping his neck into a Slim Jim. Although an autopsy yielded inconclusive results as to why the 248-pound wrestler died, we suggest it may have been something along the lines of smashing into a fucking tree.
Randy's wrestling career
Randy held numerous titles over his illustrious career. To his fans, he was known as "The Spider" because of the awkward position he assumed while being fisted by more famous wrestlers like Matt Hardy, Rey Mysterio, and John Cena.
He also got FIRED! by his boss Vince McMahon after getting word that Savage took an underage Stephanie's virginity before ol' Vinnie himself did first.