Spydar

Spydar is beaten by Hitler for being a jew, and having shit taste in clothes.

Spydar wishes he had a cock this big, whether attached or up his ass.

The poor dog he assrapes.

Spydar, the archetypical gaming LJer, quite literally a basement-dweller, is known for lusting after dinosaurs, Transformers, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and household pets.

Spydar also has an (incredibly small) artistic talent, most of which was pulled from the book Drawing the Marvel Way and gay or furry pornography. His VCL archive is composed entirely of a red and orange dinosaur-man with a metallic crab claw for an arm, screwing a black and blue striped spider-creature.

Despite having spent hours a day, for years, in various online mediums, Spydar looks down upon those who choose to seriously consider the emotional well-being of long-distance friends. Just like any typical gay jew.

Spydar claims to have major abusive tendencies and several emotional disorders. He is self-diagnosed as having bipolar, adult ADHD, and AIDS from a furpile orgy. He is on no antidepressants because they cause him an inability to orgasm during masturbation (there is no real-sex research on this, because Spydar so rarely engages in real sex, and when he does it is with male dogs). As for the ADHD, our sources believe that he spends hours in a row looking at furry porn so he can't have ADHD.

Recently surveilled activity: Getting all butthurt because his face wound up on Teh Intarwebz, then complaining because he forgot to lock down his gay dragon porn and zombie cosplay Photobucket accounts. Also, Zerocreature does not know when to let go of an old boycrush, and keeps posting to ED because she is attention whore.

TL;DR version of Spydar's BUTTHURTS

Log

4:47:02 AM) Zer0creature: Anyway, so Ni
(4:47:10 AM) Zer0creature: I still have not sent a reply to that email.
(4:47:13 AM) Zer0creature: Should I?
(4:47:41 AM) infinitival: I say, just let it rest.
(4:47:56 AM) infinitival: you're cool here with us, they can bitch over there.
(4:48:04 AM) Zer0creature: My but it's tempting to provoke him, though.
(4:48:15 AM) Zer0creature: No no it's not that anymore.
(4:48:26 AM) infinitival: I know, and that will just drag you into another flamewar.
(4:48:30 AM) eyeswideshut344: Who're you provoking?
(4:48:55 AM) Zer0creature: Actually after I settled down from the whole thing, it was funny. And brought closure to the whole issue.
(4:49:03 AM) infinitival: I'm telling you, brickwall him.
(4:49:18 AM) Zer0creature: To have him grovelling over here so that I might maybe take down a wiki entry on a satire site is so lame and sad.
(4:49:34 AM) Zer0creature: Okay, but the development is relevant regardless of what I do to the email.
(4:49:46 AM) infinitival: True.
(4:55:44 AM) Zer0creature: Does this mean no play moar with the ED entry?
(4:55:45 AM) infinitival: Ooo, just finished reading the spiral manga.
(4:56:16 AM) infinitival: No, we can have fun. If you want to continue provoking him.
(4:56:24 AM) Zaccamonst4r: The whole thing? All three parts? Damn you're wuick.
(4:56:38 AM) infinitival: No, just the first.
(4:56:50 AM) infinitival: I had to sign up for the site.
(4:57:40 AM) Zaccamonst4r: I'm on the secondlast chapter
(4:58:06 AM) Zer0creature: I am STILL waiting for confirmatino
(4:58:08 AM) Zer0creature: confirmation
(4:58:44 AM) infinitival: Check your spambox.
(4:58:49 AM) Zer0creature: Did that.
(4:59:50 AM) Zer0creature: lol I see you edited it later
(5:00:10 AM) Zer0creature: Edited for NUTS
(5:00:26 AM) infinitival: Indeed.
(5:00:50 AM) Zer0creature: I'm STILL giong to reinsert the general disclaimer.
(5:00:55 AM) Zer0creature: lol
(5:01:01 AM) Zer0creature: I should make every word link to it. XD
(5:01:24 AM) infinitival: Nah, that's fagpants.
(5:01:28 AM) Zaccamonst4r: Godamnit, what are you two talkinga bout? XP
(5:01:39 AM) infinitival: Zo, clue him in.
(5:01:49 AM) Zer0creature: What shall I do then? ED articles are shit until they reach at least 3 paragraphs.
(5:02:06 AM) infinitival: ... Ohhh, I only finished the first CHAPTER.
(5:02:20 AM) infinitival: *reads moar*
(5:02:34 AM) Zer0creature: Okay Zac:
(5:02:34 AM) infinitival: Twirly twirly twirly....
(5:03:40 AM) Zer0creature: Once upon a time 100_years_ago I was a stupid teenager. My dad was an abusive dick, so most of the friends I picked up were slightly less abusive dicks, and I didn't notice it until my twenties and junk.
(5:03:43 AM) Zer0creature: But anyway, I had such a friend named Spydar, who despite his abusive shit, was pretty cool, and hung around an ass long time.
(5:04:28 AM) Zer0creature: After I'd been talking to him nearly every day for about seven years-- and also in the middle of me being you know about a hair from mortally ill-- he stops talking to me.
(5:04:56 AM) infinitival: I seem to see more and more a synchronicity in our lives.
(5:05:02 AM) Zer0creature: There's been a lot of irrelevant emo shit on my side since then. Anyway, we had a mutual friend before he stopped talking to me who I'll just call JR.
(5:07:01 AM) Zer0creature: Spydar stopped talking to JR at about the same time as me, I kept JR around. JR was a manipulative little shit too, in his own way,
(5:07:02 AM) Zer0creature: but being he was an emo dramafag it didn't come across as too serious until a few weeks ago when he started calling people who go to furry cons pedophiles, etc etc etc.
(5:07:25 AM) Zer0creature: This from a guy who used to play a submissive purple and white racoon boy and do ageplay.
(5:07:51 AM) Zaccamonst4r: Heheh.
(5:07:53 AM) Zer0creature: but you know, he started converting to judaism and now he thinks he can be all self-righteous and shit.
(5:08:53 AM) Zaccamonst4r: Bleh
(5:09:04 AM) Zer0creature: So... whatever. I notice, in taking JR off of my watch list on FA, that he and Spydar JUST like three days ago started talking again. And almost as soon as this happens, I get this email in my box from Spydar...
(5:09:17 AM) Zer0creature: Because over 100 yrs ago, I wrote an ED article about him. I've occasionally updated it...
(5:09:34 AM) Zer0creature: With pics from his FA. Which has gay furry porn on it.
(5:09:47 AM) Zer0creature: "And he'sall BAAWW UR GON RUIN MY CAREER CALLING ME A DOG RAPIST"
(5:10:18 AM) Zer0creature: "I thought we were friends because you sent me email a couple of times over the past three years. *EMOTEAR*"
(5:11:16 AM) Zer0creature: Oh- and basically I was telling JR about the ED entry at one point. Spydar never would've noticed or cared on his own.
(5:11:57 AM) Zer0creature: I was kind of worked up about it RIGHT when it happened, but after I got my head back on, it's fucking lulzy as shit. Me and Ni have been beefing up his ED article since then.

See Also

• Furry
• Livejournal
• Boytaur
• Otherkin

External Links

Spydar on LJ

Spydar is part of a series on Furfaggotry Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage.