Malber

THIS USER IS AN ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS FAGGOT!

This article exists in limerick form to ensure that Poetlister can't enjoy her sandwich.

Every Wikipedo
in lulz-less WP-ville
liked having autism a lot, and most of them do still

But the Malber, the Malber who lived
just North of Wikipedo-ville,
sure as hell did NOT!

Malber hated autistics and aspies!
His hatred was especially wild.
Looking at the WP Admin's Noticeboard
his temper grew quite vile.
'Cos he was sadly seein' people defending, Mistress Selina Kyle.

He knew Selina an asspie,
got on with fewer people as time went by.
So then without lube, the bureaucratic fucks thrust a banhammer up her ass
... her ass, her ass, her pretty little ass.[1]

He sat there reading slowly, hotly hating the Wikipedophiles.
Messages defending her, came flooding in their piles.
They said she had asperger's; she can't help it so hell,
and Kelly Martin who blocked her should know this all too well.

So the Malber he said, "No! She was just faking! She's only self-diagnosed!" [2];
and the wikipedos went bright red, wilting at the prose.

The trolling ignited a flame war.
Ambi and other cabalists chose to whore.
Phil Sandifer went so far as to lecture them, what a fucking bore.
He said "It's an unfortunate result, then, that Asspies, are rather less suitable to rule."
Then hanging over his keyboard, he proceeded to drool.

Not long after, Selina went to Wikipedia Review and did a whole lot.
That really pissed off the wikijews whose leader created a plot.
They appointed Malber as the "honoured troll," a cabalistic troll in shining armor.
That was when they couldn't stand to see him without admin powers any longer. [3]

In his Request for Adminship, SlimVirgin lathered on praise until her underpants became sticky.
Saying, "Support. Malber has been very helpful in opposing nonsense from troublemakers, both on and off-wiki."
She said, "He's got an excellent balance of edits between articles, article talk, user talk, and project space."
Then, "He's smart, has a lot of common sense, and I think he'll make a good admin." as her vote brought more support votes from Wikipedos all over the place.

When Malber's RFA lost, he got pissed off and decided that from Wikipedoville he'd finally go.
Good old Malber, trolling Wikipedia Review like a true pro.
Malber is known to Wikipedia Review as "Public Enemy number 2".
Which really sucks for Malber, as he is behind the infamous Grace Note, who spread the rumor that all WR staff denies the killing of six million Jew.
Although Grace had the advantage of a blog to brag about trolling in,
Some examples of Malber's Wikipedia Review trolling include this gem:
"There's that awful troll malber and evil SlimVirgin saying awful nasty things about her. We must help her!"

So WR banned Malber and to Wikipedo-ville he went,
Still unbannable and on a personal crusade he was bent.

He tried to regain posting rights,[4]
But they banned him from the sites.[5]

His first order of business was for everyone to buy
The notion that Daniel Brandt looks and stinks like a homeless guy. [6]

His second order of business was really quite textual,
He convinced people that Ann Coulter was a transsexual. [7]

His third crusade was well-thought out and had the wisdom of sages.
It was to spread Harry Potter spoilers, especially by putting them in "Requests for Adminship" pages.

Unfortunately, admin WJBscribe got the ending to Harry Potter spoiled.
And after crying, vowed revenge as his blood boiled.
So he banned Malber until a month would pass.
But then WJBscribe doubled it once Malber committed mod sass.

Feeling bored, WJBscribe filed a checkuser to find any socks.
Malber, of course, isn't some loser who is going to avoid editing during his blocks
And nobody ever fucking does.
When socks were found...

And what happened then...?
Well...in Wikipedo-ville they say
That the Malber's large e-penis
Shrunk three sizes that day!
And the minute his penis didn't feel quite so tight,
He whizzed with his load through the bright morning light
And said he revoked his GDFL licenses! Thinking that was possible at all!

Then to "Wikimedia Commons" his browser did fall
Which is where people upload pictures without a care
Of things like their Gynecomastia and worse
As free license for the whole world to share.

The Malber tagged all his uploads and said to delete all of it
But then WJBscribe put a stop to that shit.

"I will have none of this", said Malber the troll,
As he revoked all of his edits, GFDL and all.
TOW however, did not like this at all
And banned his ass, page protection and all.

External links

• "Can I be a sysop?" Malber asks on Blissyu2's Wikipedia Review.
• Malber's TOW talk -- major drama
• Malber's common talk
• The thread to beat all threads, Malber's rise to fame, his first serious trolling, Wikipedia Administrator's Noticeboard Incident's Archive, 9 January 2006
• Malber's trolling resulted in this policy being started on Wikipedia
• Commons block log
• Malber!

(Note: this luser was once an EDiot, but hasn't been back since the Great Girlvinyl Turd Explosion of 2011. So, he's a coward.)

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