Jack Vale

The Pooter is a fart gag toy designed by manchild YouTube celebrity Jack Vale^✡ that has been milked for its single-use, easily amused type of function for years now. It's been whored out on YouTube and featured on any TV network that had nothing better to report on that day.

The what?

The Pooter is named as such because it's guaranteed to be the most authentic-sounding fart producer known to mankind, or your wasted money back. It's a small handheld device made of plastic and rubber that basically acts like a concealable whoopie cushion when you squeeze it.

Its single function design can be compared to that of a yo-yo, but instead of swinging around a piece of plastic on a string, you walk around in stores or libraries and squeeze a piece of plastic to make fart noises like an immature douchebag. This of course inspires kids and manchildren from all over the US to record videos of themselves doing the same exact thing in the same department stores of their own individual towns and posting them on the internet.

Value

Jack Vale has his own site where he hawks his toilet humor creation, and is sure to mention in every single Pooter prank video that you should totally go check it out and buy one or ten for yourself.

According to the site, a single Pooter costs $9.95 plus $4.95 for shipping and handling ($9.95 if it's international). So instead of that $15 Starbucks gift card you were gonna get Dave for the office party, you can give him the gift of fake farts instead. Or you can enable your kid to get beat up and kicked out of school.

While the device itself has a monetary value to it, the amount of embarrassment and stupidity you end up feeling after using it in public is priceless.

Jack Fail

Most people fail at making funny or entertaining videos by using the Pooter in public, and that's not excluding inventor Jack Vale. He has over 9000 videos of himself fagging up various Targets, Walmarts, libraries, restaurants, beaches, and anywhere else where there is at least one other person who can be filmed reacting to a grown man making a fart sound right next to them.

Jack exposes himself as a pussy who can dish it but can't take it in at least two of his own videos. In one, he runs away scared after a fat middle-aged woman gets annoyed by him and goes into her house, threatening to return with her "gat" and shoot him if he's still near her porch when she comes back out. Even his cameraman mocks him for it.

In another, Jack decides it will be funny to pretend to fart on a fat old crippled lady cruising through a department store on a motorized shopping cart -- not once, not twice, but three times. While this is somewhat funny, what happens next completely rapes Jack of his credibility. The old lady's pot-bellied hillbilly husband rises up from his own motorized cart and hobbles over to Jack, calling him out for pooting in his disabled wife's face. He winds up punching him twice in the head, leaving Jack punked by a crippled old man. Jack later tells store employees and the police that the man assaulted him, making himself a victim of his own stupidity and immaturity. Showing his loyal subscribers how much of a good guy he is, he tells the camera that he decided not to press charges against the old disabled bastard for standing up for his crippled wife... oh, and don't forget to buy a Pooter.

As if flooding YouTube with these types of videos wasn't bad enough, Jack has such a hard-on for attention that he employs every shitty, annoying, and outdated prank possible in video form in an effort to boost his popularity and make money off of AdSense and selling fart toys. These include... no, that's a fart one... another fart one... ah, forget it.

The Junior Jackasses

Jack's target audience for his potty-themed product are mainly kids who still find fart jokes funny, and YouTube is home to plenty of "Jack Juniors" who hope to live up to their hero's legacy.