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Encyclopedia Dramatica:Article of the Now/May 13, 2013
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A pirate is a sea god messenger of the Most Holy One.
These most holy creatures of the sea rise up to pwn the wicked and steal all their cool shit. Whatever they can't steal and sell for more booze will be raped, burned, or raped then burned. If you're male you either join the crew or are raped and burned with the rest of the unsellable town. If you're a black male, you either join the crew or get sold as a slave.
What's that you say? They sing jaunty nautical tunes about the mystical nature of the sea? Fuck that! There's boats to steal, bitches to rape, and cities to burn! YARR!
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