Claudia Conway

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ATTENTION!
The subject of this article is a lolcow, and is currently ripe for milking.
You can help by trolling the shit out of them whenever you see them, then laughing at their lulz-inducing theatrics.


Claudia Conway = infected with GOTIS
You can help by not giving her any attention.


Claudia Cuntway, ready for that libdick in her mouth

Claudia Conway, aka Claudia Cuntway, is a 19-year old libtard Karen in training that suffers from one of the worst cases of autism related GOTIS that the world has ever seen. She is a spoiled rich bitch / social media whore that dedicates her time to complaining about Donald Trump, pretending to want to run away from her home in Washington DC, and actively trying to ruin both of her parents lives. She dreams of one day munching Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez's carpet while Barack Obama fucks her in the ass.

   
 
"reminder that a third party vote is a vote for trump!! don’t feed into the fire. we must get him OUT. i am compelling my younger audience, if you can, to VOTE. every vote counts."
 

 
 

— - Claudia on Twitter pretending she isn't 15 years old and that she can legally vote.

Her Parents

A short fat goombah marrying a tall skinny blonde hooker. Big surprise.

Claudia was the result of a coke orgy where her parents, Kellyanne and George Conway, met, fucked, and couldn't afford an abortion after blowing all of their money on booger sugar. Nine months later she was spawned from her mother's tired, wrinkled snatch that had already pushed out multiple kids after a lifetime of republican dick pounding. Both of her parents were quiet old at the time of Claudia's birth; Kellyane was around 38, and her Husband, George Conway, was around 42. George's grandpa sperm combined with Kellyanne's dusty eggs and yeasty old uterus are probably why their daughter came out so incredibly autistic.

Despite their daughter being unplanned, unwanted, and born mentally retarded, they decided not to throw her into Paula Jones' trash bin and gave her a cozy life as a privileged white female. They later moved to DC where Claudia could live in a nice home and attend private school. Her response to this loving care and money that she received from her parents was to become a liberal shill and publicly complain about them on several online platforms in an attempt to ruin their careers. Since she has several thousand followers this slowly worked over time, culminating in both of them quietly leaving their positions getting fired in disgrace. Should have dumped her in the trash when you had the chance, mom and dad!

Kellyanne Conway: A hooker skeleton that was found under an old dumpster behind Trump Tower. Trump necro'd her (after Ted Cruz was done having sex with the corpse) and made her his personal ball washer, (and we don't mean his golf balls, wink wink!) She resigned from Trump's office in August 2020 to "spend more time with her family", which basically means Trump canned her ass due to her daughter Claudia's liberal chimping.

George Conway: A short, fat, greasy eyetie who looks like the stunt double for Joe Pesci in Casino. He is also a founding member and advisor of the Lincoln Project; a conservative Super PAC formed in December 2019 that is dedicated to fisting Trump in the upcoming election. Ashamed of his daughter's asspie behavior, as well as being tired of getting mooned by republicans on the golf course, he also "stepped down" (totally wasn't fired) from his position to also "spend time with his family", which we can only hope is guido code for killing Claudia and burying her in the desert next to Jimmy Hoffa.

Emancipation

Claudia loves to talk about how she is getting an emancipation from her parents, as if she would ever be able to survive a day without leeching off of them like the teenage Karen that she is. To make this even more unbelievable she has repeatedly said that her mother Kellyanne is her "best friend" despite their difference in political views. However, after ruining both of her parents' careers it would seem that her chances of getting kicked out of her house and living in a refrigerator box might be a real possibility in the near future.

In reality, however, her parents will probably just write "tell all" books while they sit at home and smoke crack during Fox News commercial breaks. Meanwhile Claudia will continue to pretend to hate them on social media while attempting to fool people into believing that she could survive five minutes without them and their internet connection. If she did move out and get away from her parents she would have nothing else to talk about because she's as shallow as a hangover puke puddle on a bathroom floor.

Slacktavism

File:Claudia Conway Protest.jpg
Claudia being edgy AF. Note the empty street they are standing on.

When she's not too busy begging AOC to adopt her so that they can scissor each other all night, Claudia loves to play pretend and act like she's an activist that does more than post shitty TikTok videos from her parents' house while constantly bitching about Trump. To her this counts as "activism" when in reality it accomplishes absolutely nothing.

Her idea of "protesting" is her and her other teenage pals standing on an empty sidewalk/street, probably right outside of her house since she's too scared to truly defy her parents and attend any REAL protests, holding up a sheet (probably from her mom's bed) with "Black Lives Matter" spray painted on it, and dancing to pop music while wearing masks and chanting "fuck 12". This attempt to be edgy takes cringe to the next level, raising the bar for teenage faggots across the globe. Better step it up, kids. It's gonna take a lot of lead paint in your diet to get this retarded.

How To Troll Claudia

Like most teenage twats online, Claudia is easy to get blocked by when you do any of the following:

  • Point out the fact that she is only 15 and that she should stop acting like she's not a minor.
  • Point out the fact that she is a rich spoiled brat that couldn't live without her parents' money.
  • Talk about how tremendous Trump is.
  • Tell her that she owes everything to Trump because he is the one that signs signed her mom's paychecks.
  • Tell her that her dad is going to kill her and give her some concrete shoes so she can sleep wit da fishes.
  • Tell her that she has her mother's messed up teeth/smile and that she's fucking ugly because of it.
  • Make fun of AOC.
  • Ask her if she's every actually gone to a BLM protest and demand proof.
  • Tell her that she should kill her mom.
  • Tell her that she is autistic because her parents had her when they were older than Gandalf's balls.

See Also

  • GOTIS - What Claudia suffers from.
  • Liberals - What Claudia desperately pretends to be.
  • Autism - The main cause of Claudia's problems.

External Links

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