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Blake Judd

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File:Blake-judd-family-guy.jpg
the highlight of his career, being featured on Family Guy
File:Blakejuddmug.jpg
hello there ladies

Blake Judd is an untalented, bug-eyed junkie and an aspiring black metal musician, sometimes playing on a band called Nachtmystium to afford heroin. When he's not busy trying to find a healthy vein to shoot into, he tucks his balls between his thighs and crawls back to any music label willing to sign him, while sporting his best Bambi impression. All the while avoiding the kicks to his groin area by his 13-year-old fans, huge metal fans, friends and dealers whom he owes to.

Origins of a junkie

Nobody knows for sure when his saga started, but allegedly he started heroin because fiddling a guitar wasn't netting him any cooch. Being unable to afford this habit with his shitty music, sometime around late 2013 he shifted his 419 black metal scam magic into a high gear. Making lots of people upset by not sending them the signed pieces of merch they paid for.

The present day

At the time of writing this article, Blake has rebooted his band Shaftmystium for the 25th time. Which is bound to happen everytime his anus is too sore to be working as a male hooker.

Typical quotes from his remaining fans

   
 
Judd isn't done yet. He won't be able to help himself. Don't be a sucker.
 

 
 

   
 
Realistically, why is anyone trusting him in 2013? He’s been totally ripping people off for well over a decade now. It’s a well-known fact. He rips off his friends for fuck’s sake.
 

 
 

   
 
What's interesting here is that people do not have hard feelings for any musicians that spent time in jail for stabbing, killing, raping, burning churches or being racist, but rather hail them, while on the other side they are crying because some jerk ripped off them for 20 bucks.
 

 
 

   
 
Someone post the pictures of his giant, infected Mickey Mouse hands!

Hahaha.
 


 
 

Videos

he'll never see that $20 again

his artistic vision summed up

once again

Lemmy doesn't approve of heroin

Gallery

See also

External links


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