A Real Guy

A_Real_Guy (otherwise known as ARG or Victor_Mmm), is the alias of a 53-year-old pedophile who used to run the website Purple_PJs, and give advice on their lame Ask A Guy column, until he was BANNED when he cybered with a 13-year-old girl (who claimed she was 15) in the Purple_PJs IRC channel in late 2004. The Purple_PJs staff actually didn't give two shits about this, but acted out of a sense of obligation when Victor_Mmm shared the log with internet gossip whore Monique, in the hopes that it would, "turn her on".

Victor_Mmm lays a log

Artist's rendition of ARG's bedroom. The girl on the bed is the Purple PJs mascot.

<Masked_Man> *removes your top and undoes your bra*

<13_year_old_girl> *presses harder against you and goes down

<Masked_Man> *caresses your tits nd watches your mouth go down my body*

<13_year_old_girl> *starts using her tongue taking off your boxers

<Masked_Man> *feels my hard cock brushing against your face*

<13_year_old_girl> *starts to lick it then sticks it in my mouth and starts sucking on your cock

<Masked_Man> oh my, you're 13?

<13_year_old_girl> yeah?

<Masked_Man> you're such a horny little fuck ;) i love it

<13_year_old_girl> hahaha

<Masked_Man> *holds you hair pulling your face to my cock, feeling it in and out of your mouth as i fuck your mouth*

Sadly, after 53 years, Victor_Mmm still not only fails to grasp the proper use of the English language, but also fails to realize that women find it unappealing when you describe to them your desire to fuck their face.

The Cover Up

Interestingly enough, after dropping the ban hammer on Victor_Mmm, Martine chose not to publicize his ban, offering instead the following incredibly lame excuse:

"He wasn't banned. He felt like his rein here was done and it was time to move on. I think the tight schedule of Page Editing for PJs was the ultimate push for him to move on---it's hard to schedule dates with hot 30-somethings when you're online every night."

Other Evidence of Sick fuckery

For years, ARG posed as the fatherly figure of the site, running it behind the scenes while Martine, the editor, was too busy guzzling booze and semen (as well as fellating ARG's own son, Dan, at a Purple PJs convention in San Diego in the summer of 2001). ARG flirted incessantly with the teenage girls on her site, "a safe place for girls," telling one of them, just 18, that he had saved her picture to his harddrive to masturbate to (again, note his ability to tell women exactly what they want to hear), and had phone sex with a 16_year_old_girl, and later told another that he wanted to piss on her face (god, what a charmer). The number of girls that ARG had his hooks in is at this point unknown -- he collected groupies for years, many girls had crushes on him, and outwardly he maintained a level of propriety, to the point that even now, some are in denial about his sleaziness -- see Tara_the_High_Elf.

That pissed Martine off!

After being unable to manipulate any more teenage girls for a year, ARG has created his own | web address, which appears to be a full-scale girl-oriented website, rather than strictly an advice page. The advice column will open August 18th, troll plzkthx.

It can be safely assumed that Victor, despite being 53, has never done it for the lulz.