Encyclopedia Dramatica:Article of the Now/February 16, 2013

Hufflepuff

In the fictional world of Harry Potter, magically gifted youngsters upon visiting Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry for the first time put on an enchanted hat with a lisping faggy voice that sounds like he's been mongling like seventy dicks daily for the past seventy-five years, that then neatly categorizes them into one of four houses depending on ability and racial purity.

Courageous and heroic wizards likely to become main characters in overrated fantasy books find their way into Gryffindor. Sly, darkly inclined wizards are put in Slytherin. Scholarly, creative and eccentric types are lunajacked into Ravenclaw. The fourth house, Hufflepuff, exists primarily as a dumping ground for the remedial, unattractive and those with special needs and is where all the losers, aspies and fatties end up. Being sorted into Hufflepuff is the magical equivalent of having the word 'Fail' stamped on your head in permanent ink and is a convenient way of telling all the teachers at Hogwarts not to really bother trying with you, because you'll never amount to anything.

(( HUFFLEPUFF ))

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