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Eurisko97

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Ugly muppet or something a cat coughed up?

A hairy Greek, who, according to gaelfarce, is actually "a turk and should get down with that love rather than burning his dorm down while making gyros or moussakka." eurisko97 is obsessed with min_baro, on whom he has a childish, hair-pulling crush. Ehxigisis is his way of showing his devotion to her.

Details

His childish hair-pulling is further aggravated by the fact that the object of his attention seems to not care of his LJ slanders, and by the fact that despite his constant slander, she has been made a maintainer at the anthropologist community.

This has resulted in him mentioning min_baro every chance he gets, no matter how flimsy the excuse. He also attacks anyone who agrees with or tries to discuss the posts she makes to the community. Now banned from the community for breaking the "don't be a jerk" rule, this swarthy turd-burglar has since stated his ambition:

   
 
"You can't ban people under what they post in other journals

And I won't let you silence my voice. I will create new accounts as neccassary. Stop being a sdupid moderator. If you do not quit it I will get in touch with gwinna as soon as she is available again, and ask her to make me a mod herself. There are over 1000 people on the anthropologist community. A few people leaving, frankly, /doesn't/ matter."
 


 
 

—Eurisko, standing up for free speech

His image of self grandeur does not stop there. In fact, he is so sure of his influence over LJ Land that this apparently seasoned troll has even posted a message to the LJ Abuse team on his user info:

   
 
"Dear lj_abuse,

In the unlikely event that I have misinterpreted how you apply the TOS based on my own adventures with you, (And I have moved past that, I promise. Those were fun times, weren't they?) and that you actually take the complaint by the mods of anthropologist seriously, I will not be answering any of your responses to this Livejournal, or to the email associated to this Livejournal. Please direct all official correspondence between you and myself to ehxigisis and its associated email address. I thank you for following this request. It is not that I mean to be an inconviniance, it is so that I will definitley notice you if you try to contact me. Thank you again."
 


 
 

—Eurisko, conducting serious business

He has so far made four sock puppets ( exegisis00, ehxigisis, exegesis00, and exegesis01) to harass the maintainers of anthropologist, and will no doubt make more to prove his maturity, or lack thereof, to LJ Land.

He is currently sitting in the corner of a dark room, rubbing his hands, chuckling maniacally and waiting for min_baro's downfall:

   
 
I'm really hoping that This comment, in which min_baro calls the definition of "fun" hardwired into our brains, will prove to be her downfall"
 

 
 

—Eurisko, with unrealistic expectations

He has even dedicated his new sock puppet ehxigisis to her.

Eurisko97 has expressed an interest in anal sex by revealing his desire to anally rape people until their anuses are bleeding. Since he currently cannot do that, he is currently satisfied in merely revelling in his "obvious intellectual supiriority", which includes spending hours searching through web archives in an attempt to dig up dirty laundry on his "enemies", particularly min_baro, as if anyone were surprised.

In his blackmailing brilliance, he has apparently found out that min_baro used to have a slight crush on a professor who (according to her own open admission) "walks like he's got a big fat WET maxipad inbetween his legs". One wonders what other startling discoveries he will make next. This attempt at blackmailing is supposedly in retaliation for the use of his mugshot, of which he demands: "remove my copyrighted material, or I shall resort to using yours" (ala purelily) -- this despite the fact that someone else was responsible for uploading said picture, since min_baro herself refuses to even accidentally gaze at any mugshots of the hairy Greek.

Update

Having finally learned about the concept of a Sock Puppet Account, he has apparently taken the liberty of personally deleting exegisis00, exegisis01, and exegisis02. According to him:

   
 
The idea that I was using Sock Puppet Accounts was leveled against me in part of a justification that I was a troll. Like I said, I am not a troll, I am an anti-Troll. I eat Trolls for breakfast.
 

 
 

—Eurisko, who likes them with milk

That said, he intends to create another sock puppet (which he prefers to call "dogs") to troll (for which he uses the phrase "participating in Discourse") the community from which he has been banned. He also expects to be banned, again.

Further Update: Space Aliens!

Utilizing advanced tin-foil technology, he has apparently succeeded in preventing the Evil Space Aliens from realizing that he has finally found their weakness:

   
 
I-know-something-they-don't-think-I-know! I-know-something-they-don't-think-I-know!

I am so about to crush them.
 


 
 

—Eurisko, giddy with power

It is uncertain as to what this weakness is, as he seems leery of publishing his discovery online, for fear of dooming the Earth to an eternity of domination by non-anthropologist life forms.

Tidbits and Impressions

  • gaelfarce holds a degree in anthropology, unlike Eurisko97, who is demanding that only people with degrees post in anthropologist. Therefore, gaelfarce's claim that Eurisko97 is "a turk and should get down with that love rather than burning his dorm down while making gyros or moussakka," holds more weight than Eurisko97's claim that he is a Greek.
  • Eurisko97's pet peeve, asides from min_baro, is pop culture, of which he seems to be ignorant. This is demonstrated by the fact that he constantly refers to min_baro as a goth, when in fact, she is a patchouli stinking hippie.
  • A word from wickity, who also holds a degree in anthropology, to Eurisko97: 'ti epathe? then mpories na vries to boutso?'(which roughly transalated means: what happened? cant find your cock?).
  • According to karma_soupra, Eurisko97 is "kind of like the serial killer who screams 'i did it! i am the GENIUS!... why are you arrestng me? can't you see how great i am? hey! get your hands off me!'"
  • Believes that he knows the Bible better than the people who authored it. Attempted to translate the opening passage of St John's Gospel with words that weren't in the Greek. Claimed that he knows Koine Greek better than anybody else, meaning that he is able to write translations as they - and I quote - "were meant to be translated".
  • Has allegedly been so desperate as to have had to date people suffering from internet disease and morbid obesity. Further information may follow....
  • Smells like onions and gyrotrash.

Related links

Eurisko97's journal

Ehxigisis's journal