Jeffrey Epstein

Jeffrey Epstein^✡ was an American financier and registered sex offender, and is the Final Boss of American Pedophilia, a title he earned by molesting at least 100 children and getting away with it because of a combination of Jewgold and being Bill Clinton's BFF and on top of that him being Jewish.

Molesting more kids than Pedobear and Jimmy Savile combined, the motherfucker had it down to a science. Not only would he fly kids around on his plane dubbed the 'Lolita Express' so that he could play doctor with them on his own private island, he actually paid these girls to then go back home and convince their friends to let him fuck them, too! One would think that this would earn him an Over 9000-year long sentence of sharing a cell with Bubba, but instead, he only served one year in a federal country club, where he got to leave for 12 hours six days out of the week for "work release," the kind of sentence Jerry Sandusky only dreams he could have had.

Of course, because of all his power and wealth, he'll probably just weasel out of it once again with just a slap on the wrist again. Maybe the slap will actually break the skin for once, but not until the slapper apologizes for slapping a bit too hard. Watch this space in 2025 when he'll be arrested for a fifth time despite assuring us this time that he's super sorry and he swears he won't do it again, honest, cross my heart, hope to die... by the way how many zeros are in "five hundred million dollars"?

The Guy Qanon Warned You About

Jeffrey's Magical Kiddie Playhouse is home to such impeccable decor as a life-sized mannequin in a wedding dress hanging from a chandelier, an entire wall made out of glass eyeballs intended for wounded British soldiers, and an oddly prophetic mural of him in prison, surrounded by barbed wire and guard towers, but conspicuously absent of a marauding horde of angry, horny niggers eager to show a rich Jew what happens to pedophiles in prison.

As if intentionally designed to get the Qanon and Pizzagate faggots at 8chan to furiously masturbate over the implications of creepy-ass, edgelord designs that would have been considered too on-the-nose even for a fucking Saw movie, his 7-story townhouse in Jew York City would have made the perfect Halloween attraction had it not been declared a crime scene for hosting more CP than AllTheFallen.ninja and Sarah Butts' harddrives put together. Cleverly hidden on compact discs labeled 'nude girls', either the guy is an absolute fucking retard when it comes to hiding his CP stash, or he was just that confident that the Party Van would never come for him again, and if it would, he'd get off scott-free once more.

Wikipedia Shilling

Almost instantaneously with the charges and arrest, mentions of Bill being with Kevin Spacey on Jeff's rape island were removed from the Wikipedia page while keeping a mention of him meeting Trump once years ago still there. (Clearly nothing sinister here, folks)

The Lolita Express

This being the nickname for the private plane in which Epstein's guests were shuttled back and forth to his private pedo paradise, Little St James, one of the smaller of the Caribbean Virgin Islands.

Given who his friends are, it's probably the latter.

The Lolita Express

• Someone who understands high finance tries to make sense of the Epstein saga (Archived:  1  2)