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Gabby Petito

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
This is an old revision of this page, as edited by imported>Nix at 06:00, 2 October 2021. It may differ significantly from the current revision.
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Gabby Petito was a YouTube "van-life" creator, Instagram thot and at the moment, the most lucrative dead bitch in the entire world.


In September of 2021, Gabby was reported missing while "traveling" the country, in her van, with her prematurely balding fiancee, Brian Laundrie. As with every missing or murdered woman, she apparently "loved life" "had a smile that lit up the room" and the world collectively lost their shit when her body was found.

Brian Laundrie, a balding Manlet, returned with Gabby's van after no one had heard from her. He was extremely smart, despite how fucking dumb he looks, and STFU and refused to speak to the police.

We love our law enforcement

The cops and even the fucking FBI claimed to have been watching his house, yet somehow Brian managed to disappear completely. Millions have been spent searching for this idiot; helicopters, K-9 units, trackers, divers and anything else law enforcement in Florida can waste money on.

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