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Loose Change

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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This page contains spoilers — important plot secrets and/or conclusions may be revealed. For example,
HOLY SHIT JEWS DID WTC!!!!!1
   
“ 		 
Jews are to blame. Anything else is scientifically impossible.
  		„
  		 

—Dylan Avery, Loose Change

The geniuses who know moar than every Professor of engineering, physics, chemistry, metallurgy, botany and women's studies. Also the world's three oldest virgins, excluding you, you 30 year old basement dweller.

Loose Change is the result of three college rejects discovering iMovie. Executive producer Dylan Avery developed the idea while masturbating furiously to 9/11 pictures and realized there was an unexplained puff of smoke coming out of the WTC during the collapse. He asked then Web designer, now controlled demolition expert, Jason Bermas for scientific evidence of Jew involvement; the rest is history.

Using groundbreaking original research this film has managed to convince 40% of Americans that Jews did WTC. Subsequently it has also convinced 60% of America that the editors of the film should be castrated to prevent any chance of a sequel to Dylan Gayvery.

Tinfoil hat wearer Alex Jones was brought on as an executive in the most recent version to help make it even more batshit crazy and remove any possible trace of actual science or sound reasoning.

The movie has been spawned eight sequels:

  • Loose Change II: Electric Boogaloo
  • Loose Change III: Looser than Ever
  • Loose Change IV: Live Free or Lose Change
  • Loose Change: I Don't Want to Get a Real Job
  • Loose Change: Holy Shit, People Will Actually Pay for this Crap?
  • Loose Change: What Do You Mean it's Copyrighted?
  • Loose Change: Any Which Way but Loose (Currently involved in lawsuit with the Clint Eastwood estate)
  • Loose Change: We Ain't Done Milkin' this Bitch Yet.
  • Loose Change: This Time, It's Personal


Prior to the release of Loose Change: Final Cut, Gayvery announced that Final Cut would be his last conspiracy movie, as he moved on to bigger and better projects using his newfound stardom.

He is currently working on another version of Final Cut. Called Loose Change: Final Cut: Retarded Physics Make Sense.

Despite his newfound stardom, Avery has still yet to be laid.

History

September 2001: Jews destroy World Trade Center

December 2005: The amazingly powerful global Jew conspiracy- with agents everywhere, unlimited funds at their disposal, and control of every government official from the President of the United States down to the dogcatcher of Bumfuck, Tennessee- somehow fails at stopping three douchebags from releasing a movie they cooked upon their MacBooks.

February 2006: YouTube becomes famous, people find out about movie from their fucktard friends.

June 2006: Second release. Revised claim "steel melts at like, 8 billion degrees Fahrenheit. My Dad said so and he's a scientist and stuff!" Removed Weekly World News as official reference.

November 2007: Final Cut released. Alex Jones introduces controversial "Loch Ness monster was actually flying the planes" theory.

August 2008: Final Cut: We really mean it this time released. Movie is just a recorded apology from Gayvery.

Actual Quotes from Film

This still from the movie shows where a Jew was suspected to have lived.

"It isn't immediately obvious why building 7 collapsed. From this we can infer that George W Bush under direction from leftist Nazi Jews from the year 3000 personally planted Thermite bombs in the basement of the building."

"Since the science behind the controlled demolition is obvious even to a 5 time college reject like myself, it must be overwhelming and irrefutably clear to every engineer, architect, construction worker and every guy who ever entered a building at some point in his life. Since none of them has come forward, we have to assume they are part of the Jew conspiracy. It follows that not only the entire federal government, but state and local governments have been contaminated by Jews reaching down as low as the assholes who check parking meters. Why it would even be necessary to hatch such an elaborate conspiracy if the Jews already had the unbelievable power needed to maintain it's secrecy, well we don't know. We don't pretend to have all the answers. "

"OMGZZZZ SILVERSTEIN SAID ___PULL___ THE BUILDING. OMG OMG OMGG!!!!!1!!1!!!!111!!1one!!!!1!(exp(0)) PULL CAN ONLY MEAN "JEWS DID IT" ROFLMAO WAKE UP PEOPLE SEE THE EVIDENCE FOAR YOURSELF!!!""

Terrorists

Even Bill O'Reilly believes in LC.

If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, and you think it's a duck? You're UnAmerican, lol After millions of people were convinced 9-11 was an inside job after watching Loose Change, it was only a matter of time before some celebrities committed political suicide. You must call them "UnAmerican" and "Terrorists" to be part of the cool kids club.

Cool People

Typical conspiracy theorist dumbfuck

The Second Edition

Due to Dylan Gayvery's obvious antisemitic ties and desire for attention, along with other things, he decided to create an even shittier revision inspired by posts on his forum.

The key difference between the first and second editions is that the first edition contained vandalized versions of Wikipedia pages as their chief evidence. The second edition took those out.

See Also

External Links

Loose Change is part of a series on

Truth

Visit the Truth Portal for complete coverage.

Loose Change is part of a series on

Television

Visit the Television Portal for complete coverage.

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