Kolkhoznik

Kolkhoznik, Formly known as cAssidy Rae Henry- is your typical teenaged dramu-whore, whiny, bratty, selfish, narcissistic wannabe hipster HIPSTER cuntfuck with nothing better to do during the day than sit on the computer 24/7 and baw about how terrible her life is. She has few IRL friends; but nobody likes her because they think she's fucking weird and has greasy, flat, hair; while all of them smell her god damn disgusting-as-fuck vagina from over 100 miles away. The only thing her fishy cunt will attract is bears.

Hint: when talking about wonders about communism, don't take pictures of yourself in a captalist grocery store.

Born from somewhere not in Russia, cAssidy grew up EXACTLY THE SAME as any other child ever. Despite her oh-so-sad stories about child BAAAAWWWUSE, cASSidy is nothing special in terms of a deep life story and her "significant other". Her "friend"-hunting techniques include picking a victim suitable to her selfish, single-minded lifestyle and ensnaring them in a web of candycoated bullshit. Eventually, she'll show her true colors, and all the victims will want to do is throw a fucking large brick at her head and hope she won't be able to go to the hospital. She primarily stalks around on dA for the 'silly haters and stupid 13 year old trolls' like every other teenage dramuwhore and produces BAWWW journals and wannabe communist 'propaganda art'.

It's obvious that a pornographic photographer is Cassidy Henry's Grandpa.

Facts about Cassidy - She is a Red, she can speak rzn, and she likes everything slavic. - She is egoistic. - She is a pretentious, haughty, and petty bitch bucket. - She is ALWAYS right because she SAYS SO and everything she SAYS or THINKS is FACT. She does not care what you say or think because she is ALWAYS right!!!1eleven!!! - She once wanted Bill Gates' dick. - She is the most obvious narcissist and elitist you will ever come across. - She is a slavboo. - She has no sense of humor and takes things too literally. - She has ABSOLUTELY never found something that she thinks is funny on the interwebs, well, maybe for goatse??? - She will be a straight up cunt to you if your views on anything differ from hers. - She is currently having a threesome with pedo commiefags and jews RIGHT NOW. - She WILL block you. It is inevitable. - She thinks that lacking shampoo and vitamin D is AWWWWWRIGHT. - She was voted to be crowned the next Queen of /v/. They trolled the shit out of her deviantfArt but she insists they were just being friendly! :) - She thinks she is very witty trololololol but she is just a dumb ignorant Russki american girl whom is addicted to browsing OhInternet/KYM. - She is a compulsive liar and loves to take advantage of people. - She thinks freedom of speech protects her from criticism of any form. - Her favorite colors are red and yellow <a>(Link to "fangirl") HMMM I WONDER WHY?</a> - She is NON REGLIGOUS!!!!111!q=1w - She mentally touches herself when exaggerating her few shitty talents. - Apparently, she is obsessed with portal/any non-shitty valve game. She says she torrents stuff (And, of course, never checks the comments on the download), so be sure to pack some trojans with your latest crack of portal 2 on tpb. - wait what communists use tpb, facebook, and twitter?????! - n_NN_n_n she is kawiaiwia desune hehe!!!! ^_________^ - She is also Hitler's mom

Ways to troll Cassidy Here are some one ups when you want to get delicious reactions out of her. - Say communism is broken. - Stalin > Lenin - Obama > Putin - Talk to her in Russian by using Google Tranny. - Spam the shit out of her dA [link] DEED DONE LOL DEACTIVATED!!! - Tell her that all teenagers hate their parents. - Send her messages claiming you accidentally found her nudes on a Russian porn site, she'll believe you and click the link. +1000 IF THE SITE CONTAINS A VIRUS!!!! - Ask her shit on tumblr and say "hey this kind of reminded me of you [link to virus site]". Be sure to lie about who you are!!!

Run in with /v/ Once upon a time some guy named Viktor decided to browse for some STALKER fan art on devianTart. As he was looking, he came across the atrocity known as Cassidy's dA. He took notice of the high faggotry level her ID was emitting and huried to 4chan to get /v/'s opinion. Unaware of the fuckery that was amidst, Cassidy noticed her pageviews rising rapidly and thus posted a journal about it. /v/ saw it, agreed with Viktor, laughed forever at her retardation, and ATTACKED.

[ Gallery; 4chan Thread about her & Journal Screencaps ]

GETTING TROLLED Everybody wants to curb stomp Cassidy, but since most of them can't physically do this from a computer they just do what the internet has taught them: spam like hell.

DeviantTART vs Kolkhoznik Her haters are more apparent on here than anywhere else she resides at on the internet probably because she can't control who can or can not comment on her deviantart. Cassidy is typically spammed on a weekly basis by relentless yet determined trolls.

[ Gallery; contains the minor general spamothons we've had like tricia spamming scrotums ]

H4cked LOL At some point in time some anon gained access into Cassidy's deviantart account. Nobody knows the identity of the vigilante(s) or how he/she/it/they got in, but he/she/it/they left us with some priceless screen caps.

[ Gallery; consists of the caps we took while we were fucking her dA up ]

Deactivation During the early morning hours of February 3, 2011, two accounts under the names of sluttysheep5 and xxwillow-wispxx emerged from the deep dark pits of the internet and flooded her page, gallery, and russian group with sheer beauty. Her deviantart turned into a wriggling sausage collage. The comments consisted of advertisements claiming that she loves penis enlargement, and/or animations posted over 9000 times of gay men fucking. And some guy fapping.

Cassidy experienced being in the wrong place at the wrong time when she signed on to check her deviantart inbox that very morning only to discover she was being bombarded with male enhancement ads, dicks, and buttsex many times over. She freaked out, and immediately tried to hide all of the comments on her page. Sluttysheep5 spammed her gallery up so bad that she put all her deviations into storage. Sluttysheep5 and xxwillow-wispxx were posting faster than she could flag comments, so she just blocked them like the pussy faggot she is. In retaliation, more troll accounts were created within minutes of Cassidy doing this, and multiplied without mercy. Continuation of the spamming commenced with the arrival of these accounts, who were impersonation accounts with her name, Kolkhoznik, with various misspellings. For about 2 minutes, there was a stand still on both ends. The troll(s) awaited her next move, but it / they assumed she was crying like a baby and gave up since it / they remained unblocked for some time. The troll(s) lingered on her page for a brief moment, and then something unexpected happened; refreshing led it / them to a DEACTIVATED ACCOUNT page. Considering this a victory of sorts for now lawl she will be back, the troll(s) celebrated later that day. A huge internet feast was held and the troll(s) were praised for having achieved this amazing feat without even having to do much.

[ Gallery; consists of caps of this all going down ]

H4cked LOL At some point in time some anon gained access into Cassidy's deviantart account. Nobody knows the identity of the vigilante(s) or how he/she/it/they got in, but he/she/it/they left us with some priceless screen caps.

[ Gallery; consists of the caps we took while we were fucking her dA up ]

Deactivation During the early morning hours of February 3, 2011, two accounts under the names of sluttysheep5 and xxwillow-wispxx emerged from the deep dark pits of the internet and flooded her page, gallery, and russian group with sheer beauty. Her deviantart turned into a wriggling sausage collage. The comments consisted of advertisements claiming that she loves penis enlargement, and/or animations posted over 9000 times of gay men fucking. And some guy fapping.

Cassidy experienced being in the wrong place at the wrong time when she signed on to check her deviantart inbox that very morning only to discover she was being bombarded with male enhancement ads, dicks, and buttsex many times over. She freaked out, and immediately tried to hide all of the comments on her page. Sluttysheep5 spammed her gallery up so bad that she put all her deviations into storage. Sluttysheep5 and xxwillow-wispxx were posting faster than she could flag comments, so she just blocked them like the pussy faggot she is. In retaliation, more troll accounts were created within minutes of Cassidy doing this, and multiplied without mercy. Continuation of the spamming commenced with the arrival of these accounts, who were impersonation accounts with her name, Kolkhoznik, with various misspellings. For about 2 minutes, there was a stand still on both ends. The troll(s) awaited her next move, but it / they assumed she was crying like a baby and gave up since it / they remained unblocked for some time. The troll(s) lingered on her page for a brief moment, and then something unexpected happened; refreshing led it / them to a DEACTIVATED ACCOUNT page. Considering this a victory of sorts for now lawl she will be back, the troll(s) celebrated later that day. A huge internet feast was held and the troll(s) were praised for having achieved this amazing feat without even having to do much.

[ Gallery; consists of caps of this all going down ]

[[Image:Assidy Booby Ring.jpg|thumb|right| That ring looks like a bunch of cheetah tits. Kolkhoznik's "Significant Other" One day, approximately 2 weeks ago, Cassidy was browsing the interwebs (USING GOOGLE CHROME seW HIPStAr) on her srsly fucked-up-with-malware-laptop, she came across a new message on her messenger window. She was honestly confused, because she always said that she was busy doing homework because of her horrible grades ranging from D-Fs. (Babby grades: -, since she's PROBABLY still in elementary school). NOT; because she was actually "busy" going on omegle and sharing her nudes with pedophillic old men, saying she's HELLO ASL ME HORNIE GURL DU U LIK PEANUT BUTTER FARTS?! MEH 2. WATY HOEW DU I FUCK WITH COMPUTER anywaiiii__~__~_~ ^____^^;;;;;; i got nudes...... OH OH BABIE Y R U DUING THAT DU OMG MY FINGAH IS UP IN AMH PUSSIE., like a normal, lonely, teenage (Possibly 12 y/o) fuck. The message consisted of "Hey", "u gurl?", "young?" and "want 2 b frends?". She gladly said yes, due to her "Emotional ups and downs"/child bawwwuse" she had been putting up with lately. She ignored everything like HELLO I AM ASL??!?! :DDDDDDD ^^__^_^;;;;l and happily showed him her tits. They later had a happy chat about what method of birth control she uses when having sex with an older man, and how much shampoo does she use. He thought he had found the perfect one, and so did Cassidy, but in other terms, not for babby sex. TRUE LOVE KK. She later thought if she must be happy, she must marry him, get raped, and escape from this horrid world of child abuse and working at a walmart supercenter, receiving minimum wage due to her idocy. One day right after that, Cassidy woke up thinking about her knight in shining armor again, wondering how long it will take to escape from the hands of her horribly "abusive parents" whom spoil her like hell. They needed to be closer to each other, like two halves of the world. They had to be together, or life would never be right and chaos would occur each day in their little emotional hearts. She remembered her hotmail was hacked approximately 1 year ago by her friends at school. They might still know her password and get into the nudes she had been sharing with her significant other, she thought. Later, she made a new messenger account to only talk with her "Significant other" and abandoned the other one, including her contacts. After making a new messenger account, her significant other asked her her address. She didn't know exactly why, but she thought it was AWWWWWWWWWWWRIGHT! because she had only known him for a few days. She honestly loved him. She handed over the address like nothing, and then slowly waited if her significant other would come to her house. He ended up buying her a ring. A ring. It was a simply beautiful ring. It resembled 4 giant tits on one person's chest with leopard fur, and dimond nipples. She now happily keeps it on a necklace, reminding herself of how much that man wants to rape her. She writes poems for the one person she loves - HER SIGNIFICANT OTHER.

Today is the 25th anniversary of Chernobyl. It has brought the world tragedy, progress, and in some cases, lots of nice things. Chernobyl killed a lot of people and ruined a lot of lives. But it taught us how to make better reactor designs and how to avoid future instances of disasters like this. Progress! On a happier note, it brought us an amazing game series, an interest to many, a downfall to an already failing government, etc. It also gave me a few valuable things - including a few people I met/got closer to as a result of STALKER. One I know I couldn’t go without - my lovely significant other. <3 My life would SUCK if Chernobyl never happened. I’m sad about the tragedies. But we learned and gained a lot. As a whole and some as individuals -Kolkhozy

How to Write Poems Like Kolkhoznik In all honesty, Cassidy doesn't write her own poems on tumblr. They're Rumi's, but we can sure show you how to fake Rumi's poems, since OF COURSE THEY RESEMBLE cAssidy's child BAWWWWuse filled life, and true love. To put it simply, Rumi's poems make no fucking sense. Just put some random shit together so it'll sound like it was designed for an out of control tween who is experiencing puberty/I CAN LOVE.

Baby don't let go of me
I'm still making pancakes for you
I'm watching porn in my lonely hotel room
oh oh oh oh oh
OH
malaria is a parasite
malaria is deadly
oshawott
love love love
like diarrhea
i just can't get enough
i must
let it out for you
i am a plant
i am butcher
Falciparum malaria, one of four different types of malaria, affects a greater proportion of the red blood cells than the other types and is much more serious. It can be fatal within a few hours of the first symptoms.
peanut butter on my asshole
malariaaaaaaaa|Rumi COPYCAT ALERT!!!!