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Danni Ashe

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Warning!
Danni Ashe has accumulated every sexually transmitted disease known to man
Warning!
She once caught the diabeetus from a stripper pole
Lol, internets

Strippers aren't people, d00d

 
Keyboard on head Nao!!1!!1one1one

'Danni Ashe' is the name given to an enormous pair of sentient breasts hell-bent on taking over the internets. Attached to an aging coke-fiend stripper, Danni and Ashe were some of, if not the actual first members of the porn industry to move into a heavily internets based business model, and thus were some of the first to target the basement-dwelling, eternally-fapping, weeaboo nerd market. With an implacable and cold, calculating malignance Danni and Ashe moved from pimping their symbiotic host to pimping lost attention whores and then, in a stroke of pure maniacal genius, web infrastructure. Now worth probably in excess of US$200 million, the twin tits are some of the biggest players in the American porn industry.


At least 100 years ago, Danni Ashe was ranked by Guiness as the most downloaded woman evar, an honor meaning only that businessmen who wanted to bust off an easy one during their lunch breaks had noone else to fap to, internets pr0n being still in its larval stage. While little more than fap fodder, Ashe is nonetheless respected in her field for her amazing ability to stand still in front of a camera without fucking it up and for actually making money off her website, making her one of the only whores evar to not need to fuck a decomposing cadaver for teh moniez.


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