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Alpha geek

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
This is an old revision of this page, as edited by imported>Killerratte at 06:59, 17 February 2013. It may differ significantly from the current revision.
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An alpha geek is a geek who sets the example among all the other geeks he hangs out with. While his friends look up to him because he always carries around a Powerbook, a PDA and an iPod running Linux, only his dorky friends think he's cool, since in reality, he's just a lame loser who never saw a pussy in his whole life.

A standard dominance display. The alpha geek stands awkwardly behind a female, while using his hidden erection to fend off the beta geeks

Alpha geek can also refer to a geek that is unstable, that is, one who isn't ready yet. You're best to wait for the beta geek unless you're a geek developer.

The alpha geek will often reinforce his status by Pwning non-believers in the head with a gun at school.

It's a well known fact that the alpha geek will hurry to inject him or herself into any and all conversations in which computer technology is invoked. This is done to establish or reinforce the alpha geek's supremacy in the technological arena, since the alpha geek detests any degree of one-upmanship in the realm of tech. What will often occur, is that someone will make a passing remark about an OS, a feature or voice an opinion on a particular feature of a computer or OS. At this point, the alpha geek will descend like a cock hungry dockside whore, consuming the opinion and ego of the person voicing the opinion, reducing them to insanity and tears as they are swamped in mind numbing "133t5p33|<" and specs they cannot possibly understand. As the victim descends further and further into madness, an interesting side effect on the part of the alpha geek is sexual arousal of monumental proportions which the alpha geek will relieve via the violent rape, usually anal due to there being no girls on teh internets, of the nearest pwned moderate or non-geek. This is believed to be the primary reproduction mechanism of the alpha geek.

The alpha geek is made of epic fail and is true sadness in motion.


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